If he was an awful person and you left because he was so terrible.. what is the problem? You left him, he moved on, sure it was with another office girl, but he moved on. You need to leave it be, leave them be, and find happiness elsewhere. It's hard, but it's for the best.
Forgive me this stereotype Nope. Being upset doesn't mean you get to perpetuate racial stereotypes. Don't project things onto her because you're unhappy with the way things ended.
Believe it or not, people do understand what you are feeling. It happens to pretty much everyone at some point.
Their relationship is none of your business. None. His personal relationships are none of your business. "Digging" on Facebook is not doing you any good. There is zero possibility of anything positive coming out of doing that. If you are "SURE" this is to get back to you, wouldn't it have been a situation in which you wouldn't have to dig around on Facebook to find out about it? Leave it alone.
You don't know anything about what they do or do not feel about each other. They might be in love and they might just be keeping things casual, but again, it is not your business. You wouldn't be saving anyone from any pain. Don't cause drama. If he is completely ignoring then don't bother with contacting him.
And, a word of warning, do not diagnose people with mental disorders unless you have both the education and license to do so. Imagine which checklist he could go through and tell people you fit in.
A) you don't know anything about their relationship, sticking yourself into their business will get you fired. This will go down in one of two ways - first, you obsessively talk to her about his horribleness, about the way he used to treat you and the way he is using her. She files for harassment and you're gone. Second - she listens to everything, doesn't say a word because it's not good to antagonize the obsessive ex girlfriend, she goes home and tells her boss boyfriend and boss boyfriend goes on the warpath to find something legitimate to fire you for. Either way, he is still with the new girl, they are still flaunting everything around the office and you are out on the streets. The girl has plenty of people to save her if she needs it, the ex girlfriend is NOT one of them
( ... )
Completely agree with porcelain_ocean's comments. No mortgage, no job, is worth you staying in this situation. It is incredibly toxic, and change is needed. SappireLuna, you're in complete danger of losing yourself from the good person you are, and risk a very hard future path that can smear you with maliciousness and possible legal troubles. At the very least, as several posters have commented, find someone you can talk to, professional preferred, so you can vent and get some outside perspective here.
You're obsessed with him. It's not healthy. I don't think anything we can tell you will help; we're just a bunch of strangers on the Internet. I really, really think you need to talk to a qualified counselor or therapist
( ... )
Thank you. When I feel like I miss him, I re-read your comment and it makes a lot of sense. I know and can see myself that everything you said is true. But there's always the part of me that thinks of "maybe" "what if". Part of me wants us to stay friends so we still keep some kind of bond. But it's a stupid part of me and i wish I could discard it.
I didn't talk to her, but I did tell him I knew who the girlfriend was and he didn't care. He just said "you can believe whatever you want to believe." And he also said he never thought like he went too far (regarding the way he treated me when we were together). But now he doesn't talk to me at all, unless necessary for work reasons.
Right now there's no way I can quit this job. I'll never find a salary like this elsewhere, and I can't survive alone with minimum wage. It's just so hard to see how fast a relationship can go downhill. Right now the rational part of me wants to let go and never talk to him again, but the emotinal part doesn't want to =(
I don't know. I guess I don't imagine myself finding or wanting anyone else right now. But it's more like I want to believe that at some point he'll realize what he's done and that I've always been there for him, although he made it very clear himself that will never happen. And deep down I also know he never will.
But then I ask myself: If through some miracle he said he was sorry and wanted to be back with me, would I take him back with open arms or would I spit in his face and say fuck you? Of course I know which one is the right thing to do, but would I do it? I don't know. Not that it's ever gonna happen.
Comments 12
Reply
Nope. Being upset doesn't mean you get to perpetuate racial stereotypes.
Don't project things onto her because you're unhappy with the way things ended.
Reply
Their relationship is none of your business. None. His personal relationships are none of your business. "Digging" on Facebook is not doing you any good. There is zero possibility of anything positive coming out of doing that. If you are "SURE" this is to get back to you, wouldn't it have been a situation in which you wouldn't have to dig around on Facebook to find out about it? Leave it alone.
You don't know anything about what they do or do not feel about each other. They might be in love and they might just be keeping things casual, but again, it is not your business. You wouldn't be saving anyone from any pain. Don't cause drama. If he is completely ignoring then don't bother with contacting him.
And, a word of warning, do not diagnose people with mental disorders unless you have both the education and license to do so. Imagine which checklist he could go through and tell people you fit in.
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
I didn't talk to her, but I did tell him I knew who the girlfriend was and he didn't care. He just said "you can believe whatever you want to believe." And he also said he never thought like he went too far (regarding the way he treated me when we were together). But now he doesn't talk to me at all, unless necessary for work reasons.
Right now there's no way I can quit this job. I'll never find a salary like this elsewhere, and I can't survive alone with minimum wage. It's just so hard to see how fast a relationship can go downhill. Right now the rational part of me wants to let go and never talk to him again, but the emotinal part doesn't want to =(
Reply
Reply
But it's more like I want to believe that at some point he'll realize what he's done and that I've always been there for him, although he made it very clear himself that will never happen. And deep down I also know he never will.
But then I ask myself: If through some miracle he said he was sorry and wanted to be back with me, would I take him back with open arms or would I spit in his face and say fuck you?
Of course I know which one is the right thing to do, but would I do it? I don't know. Not that it's ever gonna happen.
Reply
Leave a comment