Old Habits Die Hard

Im Sorry. I've had a bad day again.

Hello LJ.

I forgot about you.

Am I in need of a rant??

Yes.

Am I too sober at the moment?

Yes.

See you again in an hour or two :)

Love is just a hoax so forget everything that you have heard

I won't speak
I won't cry
I won't admit I feel broken
& lost
& feel so pathetic just for feeling like this.

I'll just smile
& pretend that im okay.

If you looked Inside a girl;
you would see how much she really cries,
you would find so many secrets and
lots of lies but what you'll see most is how hard it is to stay strong

when nothing is right and everything is wrong
 

I refuse to let you drag me down again.

I’m in a good place now

I’m happy

With wonderful friends

& I have long moved on from you.

But when yr standing in front of me like that

Screaming at me.

I fell like that stupid pathetic little 16 yr old girl again

& I hate you for that

You are just fucked up beyond repair.

You are poison

You kill everything you touch

& ( Read more... )

The water is rising.

But I'll drown before I cry for help.

I feel so alone.

Fuck it.

*waves white flag*

Each and every time I turn around to leave
I feel my heart begin to burst and bleed
So desperately I try to link it with my head
But instead I

fall

back to my knees
As you tear your way right through meI forgive you once again
Without me knowing
You've burnt my heart to stone

I guess you can change the place.
But nothing else.

I just figured some things out.
I’m going to fix some things.
Get some things back
Start feeling some things again.
& Bob the builder myself up.

Because you never know how long its really gna last.

Today a number of things are causing me to smile in bounce...

Paula getting into her course has to be number one!!!!!!
Also how drunk I was on Saturday is making me smile!
& the fact I woke up in the barmans bed :D
And Im meeting Rory to get high & got the VIP on Wednesday!

I like this week

xx