god. life is killing me.

it just takes a weekend, ive seen her twice, and i cannot think of anything else. i want her so much. i was stoned walking next to her and all i could think of was fucking her, kissing her, mouths and arms and breasts and smooth smooth skin. god i wish things were different. i wish she was with me. but circumstances and other people get in the way ( Read more... )

i feel it's going the same way as all the others. i refuse to be controlled.

yet another new relationship and i am in love. really. i am. god. i feel so fake, how many times can i say it? i am in love this time. i alway think im in love this time, and every time it feels good and new and like nothing ive ever felt before. then something happens and it turns itself off like a tap, and i am left, loveless, empty inside, with ( Read more... )

yes fucking yes! they broke up. i have no guilt. shes coming to visit, and im not sure what will happen but yeah. hmm. the ex is also coming to vist. im caught in the middle, i love them both equally, i want them both. im planning on asking them if they will try a poly relationshipw ith me, either that or i wont be with either as i refuse to choose ( Read more... )

oh god, i am about to do what i said id never do. i am well on my way to becoming 'the other woman'. and its with a close friends s/o. shit. she deserves it, she has repeatedly cheated on her s/o, not even with anyone worth it. she treats her badly. i dont know. i just cant stop myself. i want her so much it hurts. three years this has been coming ( Read more... )

i wish i could stop saying my head is fucked, but i cant. its so true. i dont seem to be contributing to my life anymore, im just floating along, having stuff happen to me. i need to get away from here like i need air. im going to go insane if i stay much longer. small house, different rules, no independance. its driving me round the bend. and i ( Read more... )

text moo sent me : 'lets fuck, damn the consequences i want you!damn it!' well that's head fucking. things are fucked up there ( Read more... )

i don't know what is wrong with me, i cried for 3 hours last night, over what, i'm not quite sure. but i think it was just everything. i feel so overwhelmed at the moment; uni, leaving for wales, money, brewer, scott (and his disappearance), everything seems to be happening all at once, and i'm finding it difficult to cope. thankfully today has ( Read more... )

i need to rave and rant. why wont he stop touching me? we are not together, i know things are difficult for both of us, but he is making it more difficult for himself and for me by being the way he is. hugs every two minutes, stroking my skin when we are sitting next to each other, a hand on my knee, kissing my lips, i dont want him to do it, when ( Read more... )