[Chaptered] The Bet 19 (completed)
Title : The Bet [chap.19]
Author : lovu_lovu_aiba
Beta : ice_colour *we started and finished it together, otsukare XD
Pairing : Sakuraiba? Junba? you will see XD
Genre : AU, Romance
Rating : PG13 [Sho`s POV] and NC17 [Aiba`s POV]
Disclaimer : Just own the plot XD
Summary : Six years after Sakurai Sho and his friends were betting to make Aiba Masaki fallen for one of them, they met again. Brought their hurt, pain and grudge. Everything around them had changed, everything...except their love...
banner by. sakumo114
Sho`s POV
Did his apology change anything between us? I wasn’t really sure about that. Even if I had a lot of questions for him - like how did he find Aiba - I couldn’t stop but feel irritated and angry every time I saw him. I didn’t blame him for everything that happened between me and Aiba, because I knew it was my fault. It was my fault for not confessing to him earlier and saving him a lot of things that hurt him, it was my fault for not believing him and breaking our relationship. It was even my fault for letting him go and leave me for 6 years.
For a few minutes we just stood and kept quiet, without either one trying to open the conversation. I was so tired of everything… I didn’t mind to be called a loser because of running away from this problem. I had had enough with all the pain and regret. I wanted to forget about it but I couldn’t forgive myself, and the main point of this all was I didn’t want to forget about Aiba, even it meant I had to bear the same pain for forever.
“I know it may be too late to do it…” he broke the silence and I looked at him, I didn’t see any happiness in his eyes at all, in fact he looked hurt. “But I couldn’t forgive myself for causing a lot of pain for you and Masaki…”
“You`re right…it`s too late,” I answered him.
He looked at me and still…I saw a lot of pain in his eyes, “I was too egoistical to understand love, I know it… I did a lot of cruel things to separate you from him, I wanted him so badly, to the point where I didn’t even think twice before destroying you…”
“This confession doesn’t change anything, he chose you already…” That was true, even though he separated me and Aiba, the fact that Aiba chose him didn’t change.
“You…you don’t want him anymore?” he asked.
“This is not about me, it’s about him! He left me again, and he did it because he wants to be with you!” I yelled in frustration.
He shook his head, “He never wanted to be with me, no matter how long I’d wait his heart will still belong to you…”
My hands clasped till I started to feel them hurt, “This is conversation useless--”
“I hid him from you for 6 years… I`m sorry…” he cut me off.
“You…what?” I asked.
“I hid him…for these past 6 years…from you…” he repeated.
I shuddered, “How…?”
He smiled, but again, it was a smile filled with pain, “I wanted to be with him no matter what… When he left you that day…I was still outside your room. He passed me like I was a wall but I stopped him and offered to protect him from you. He smirked at me and said that he hates me, he said that he knows about the bet and asked me if I was satisfied after I saw him leaving you and said that there is no difference between you and me… I understand what he meant, we’re both jerks…”
“I answered that he couldn’t run away from you if you wanted him to come back, you would do whatever it takes to make him go back to you. I said that I have a way to make sure you’d never find him and that way is to let me hide him, because you would never think that he’s with someone who ruined his relationship with you,” he took a deep breath and continued, “I said that accepting my protection couldn’t make anything worse. I knew he hated me, and he knew everything about the bet already so I couldn’t do anything else to hurt him, but I could hide him from you…”
I couldn’t even say anything at this.
“I promised him that I wouldn`t do anything to him, I thought that he probably felt like he couldn’t believe anyone, but he didn’t have any place to go, so he said he’d take the offer. It wasn’t like you think, like after that he forgave me… No, he didn’t talk to me at all for 2 years. Even though he was hiding in one of my houses, I never really visited him, partly because I knew that he didn’t want me to…but at least I knew that he was okay…”
“After 2 years he slowly started talk to me. It wasn’t because he forgave me, it was because he forgave you…and he realized he still loved you…” he stopped and bit his lower lip.
“Those 2 years I thought I had won him from you, but I was wrong…you still own his love.”
“I started to regret all the things that I did to both of you. Every time he watched television and they talked about your corporation he would smile…he just smiled when he heard a piece of information about you. Then I thought it’s the time to let him go, I asked him if he wants to meet you again…but he smiled and shook his head, he didn’t want to disturb you anymore…”
I closed my eyes, we loved each other…for a very long time, even though we got separated. Half of my heart couldn’t believe that he was still thinking about me after all the things I did to him, after I hurt him so much.
“I took him with me and we left Japan for a while, to continue my studies, but at some point I realized I did it because I didn’t want you to find him… Even though I knew both of you were suffering and I hurt, too, I still couldn’t let him go…”
“We lived like you`re just a piece of our memories, we lived together and started dating. But it was only because he thought he owes me, or probably just because I said that he doesn’t need to push himself to love me, and I would wait until he could forget you. Day after day passed and I realized…he couldn’t forget about you. Every time he opened his eyes he would sat on his bed and close them again, then he would smile, the smile that always appeared when he heard something about you…”
I realized how painful it was for Jun, although the person he loved was always beside him, he never loved him back…or probably Jun just didn’t know that Aiba loved him back…
“We came back to Japan about 6 months ago and he started to work at that café until we met you…and I thought it’s a warning from God to me, that I can`t separate two people who had fallen for each other, longer than this…”
“I didn’t want to see his pained expression anymore… I bore it for 6 years, seeing him in that state, seeing him hurt because of my egoism, I couldn’t bear it anymore, I can`t bear that I am the reason why he feels all that pain… I love him, but I could never make him happy, in fact I just hurt him again and again…” It was the first time I saw him crying.
“He loves you, Sho… Have always loved you…” for a few minutes his sobbing filled the room.
He raised his head and looked at me, his expression looked like one asking for help. I moved closer to him and took a deep breath before I talked, “I already heard everything that happened during those past 6 years from you; it doesn’t matter whether he loves me or not now, he chose to be with you, and I know he always has a reason to do something… Sometimes being with the person we love will hurt us more than if we are separated from them… Maybe he loves me, it`s just a possibility now, but there is a truth about him now, he wants to be with you…if he really loves me, but he chose you over me, doesn’t that mean he loves you more?” I asked.
“Don’t get me wrong, it`s not because I don’t want him or I don’t love him anymore… I do want him and love him so much…I just want to let him do whatever he wants. He has suffered a lot, if he thought that he will be happy by being with you, then I`ll try to be happy for him."
"I want just one thing from you, please don’t let him suffer anymore. We can`t bear when he is hurt, right?” I asked and he nodded, I smiled to him, the first smile after these past 6 years. A smile that erased all the grudges between us, a smile that was the same as a sign…that I let Aiba Masaki go, completely…to pursue his own happiness, because he deserved it, he deserved more than happiness…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~********~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I didn’t bring a lot of stuff, just a suitcase with my clothes, which I packed some days ago. I walked slowly and stopped near my window, the snow had piled up outside. My thoughts were wandering around again, to the day when I was still together with him. When I could still hug him freely, or the taste of his lips on mine… Could I forget about him someday? And think about him while smiling or think of everything I did with him as of just a memory? Will a day come, when I can move on?
Someone knocked on my door.
“Come in…”
My butler opened the door and bowed, “It`s time, young master. Two hours earlier, just as you asked.”
I nodded, “Okay. We will stop at my high school.”
He bowed, “Yes, young master.”
The snow made the pace the car was riding become slower. But after 15 minutes my car stopped in front of my high school’s gate. I lift my hand to sign that there’s no need to open my door for me, nor follow me inside.
I opened the door by myself, it was hard to walk through the snow piles. My pants were damp when I reached the building, it was Sunday so no one was there. I walked slowly along the corridor and felt lot of memories flooding my head. I passed my resting room, they had kept that useless room exactly like how I left it, I thought; they hadn’t changed it.
I kept walking and climbed the stairs to the rooftop. It was probably crazy to go there while it was snowing like there’d be no tomorrow. But I had no time… I opened the door and walked out. There were some snow piles in the corners of the rooftop, I stood up there, it was funny how I could fill my heart with the warmest memory of him in the coldest place.
When I thought it was enough, I walked back to my car. I couldn’t really remember what I did after that, but I reached the airport early. I walked slowly while my butler followed me from behind. I told Nino and Ohno not to escort me to the airport, but we had a party, I didn’t understand the purpose of the party, probably just a farewell party? Because we never really had been separated before, at least I had never left Japan for such long time before.
“Do you want to wait here, young master?” my butler asked me.
“Yes,” I thought about it for a while, “Yes, I`ll wait here…”
It was really stupid as I’d made sure before that no one would stop me this time, but I really wanted someone to stop me and persuade me to not leave Japan. I wanted to be stopped by someone who would say that he needs me here. Or probably I just wanted to be stopped by Aiba, though I knew it didn’t even make sense, we were over…
I glanced at my watch, it was time to go, I stood up, “Have a nice trip, young master…” my butler said and bowed.
“Thank you,” I walked slowly to the gate… I slowly closed my eyes and opened them again. I would leave this place, the place where Aiba existed… I’d strengthen my heart to walk in the world without him…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~********~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aiba`s POV
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~********~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I`ll disable the comment on this POV...prepare your weapon, I`m ready if you want to kill me...XD
go ahead on Aiba`s POV, and you`re free to kill me after you read it ^.^
Author : lovu_lovu_aiba
Beta : ice_colour *we started and finished it together, otsukare XD
Pairing : Sakuraiba? Junba? you will see XD
Genre : AU, Romance
Rating : PG13 [Sho`s POV] and NC17 [Aiba`s POV]
Disclaimer : Just own the plot XD
Summary : Six years after Sakurai Sho and his friends were betting to make Aiba Masaki fallen for one of them, they met again. Brought their hurt, pain and grudge. Everything around them had changed, everything...except their love...
banner by. sakumo114
Sho`s POV
Did his apology change anything between us? I wasn’t really sure about that. Even if I had a lot of questions for him - like how did he find Aiba - I couldn’t stop but feel irritated and angry every time I saw him. I didn’t blame him for everything that happened between me and Aiba, because I knew it was my fault. It was my fault for not confessing to him earlier and saving him a lot of things that hurt him, it was my fault for not believing him and breaking our relationship. It was even my fault for letting him go and leave me for 6 years.
For a few minutes we just stood and kept quiet, without either one trying to open the conversation. I was so tired of everything… I didn’t mind to be called a loser because of running away from this problem. I had had enough with all the pain and regret. I wanted to forget about it but I couldn’t forgive myself, and the main point of this all was I didn’t want to forget about Aiba, even it meant I had to bear the same pain for forever.
“I know it may be too late to do it…” he broke the silence and I looked at him, I didn’t see any happiness in his eyes at all, in fact he looked hurt. “But I couldn’t forgive myself for causing a lot of pain for you and Masaki…”
“You`re right…it`s too late,” I answered him.
He looked at me and still…I saw a lot of pain in his eyes, “I was too egoistical to understand love, I know it… I did a lot of cruel things to separate you from him, I wanted him so badly, to the point where I didn’t even think twice before destroying you…”
“This confession doesn’t change anything, he chose you already…” That was true, even though he separated me and Aiba, the fact that Aiba chose him didn’t change.
“You…you don’t want him anymore?” he asked.
“This is not about me, it’s about him! He left me again, and he did it because he wants to be with you!” I yelled in frustration.
He shook his head, “He never wanted to be with me, no matter how long I’d wait his heart will still belong to you…”
My hands clasped till I started to feel them hurt, “This is conversation useless--”
“I hid him from you for 6 years… I`m sorry…” he cut me off.
“You…what?” I asked.
“I hid him…for these past 6 years…from you…” he repeated.
I shuddered, “How…?”
He smiled, but again, it was a smile filled with pain, “I wanted to be with him no matter what… When he left you that day…I was still outside your room. He passed me like I was a wall but I stopped him and offered to protect him from you. He smirked at me and said that he hates me, he said that he knows about the bet and asked me if I was satisfied after I saw him leaving you and said that there is no difference between you and me… I understand what he meant, we’re both jerks…”
“I answered that he couldn’t run away from you if you wanted him to come back, you would do whatever it takes to make him go back to you. I said that I have a way to make sure you’d never find him and that way is to let me hide him, because you would never think that he’s with someone who ruined his relationship with you,” he took a deep breath and continued, “I said that accepting my protection couldn’t make anything worse. I knew he hated me, and he knew everything about the bet already so I couldn’t do anything else to hurt him, but I could hide him from you…”
I couldn’t even say anything at this.
“I promised him that I wouldn`t do anything to him, I thought that he probably felt like he couldn’t believe anyone, but he didn’t have any place to go, so he said he’d take the offer. It wasn’t like you think, like after that he forgave me… No, he didn’t talk to me at all for 2 years. Even though he was hiding in one of my houses, I never really visited him, partly because I knew that he didn’t want me to…but at least I knew that he was okay…”
“After 2 years he slowly started talk to me. It wasn’t because he forgave me, it was because he forgave you…and he realized he still loved you…” he stopped and bit his lower lip.
“Those 2 years I thought I had won him from you, but I was wrong…you still own his love.”
“I started to regret all the things that I did to both of you. Every time he watched television and they talked about your corporation he would smile…he just smiled when he heard a piece of information about you. Then I thought it’s the time to let him go, I asked him if he wants to meet you again…but he smiled and shook his head, he didn’t want to disturb you anymore…”
I closed my eyes, we loved each other…for a very long time, even though we got separated. Half of my heart couldn’t believe that he was still thinking about me after all the things I did to him, after I hurt him so much.
“I took him with me and we left Japan for a while, to continue my studies, but at some point I realized I did it because I didn’t want you to find him… Even though I knew both of you were suffering and I hurt, too, I still couldn’t let him go…”
“We lived like you`re just a piece of our memories, we lived together and started dating. But it was only because he thought he owes me, or probably just because I said that he doesn’t need to push himself to love me, and I would wait until he could forget you. Day after day passed and I realized…he couldn’t forget about you. Every time he opened his eyes he would sat on his bed and close them again, then he would smile, the smile that always appeared when he heard something about you…”
I realized how painful it was for Jun, although the person he loved was always beside him, he never loved him back…or probably Jun just didn’t know that Aiba loved him back…
“We came back to Japan about 6 months ago and he started to work at that café until we met you…and I thought it’s a warning from God to me, that I can`t separate two people who had fallen for each other, longer than this…”
“I didn’t want to see his pained expression anymore… I bore it for 6 years, seeing him in that state, seeing him hurt because of my egoism, I couldn’t bear it anymore, I can`t bear that I am the reason why he feels all that pain… I love him, but I could never make him happy, in fact I just hurt him again and again…” It was the first time I saw him crying.
“He loves you, Sho… Have always loved you…” for a few minutes his sobbing filled the room.
He raised his head and looked at me, his expression looked like one asking for help. I moved closer to him and took a deep breath before I talked, “I already heard everything that happened during those past 6 years from you; it doesn’t matter whether he loves me or not now, he chose to be with you, and I know he always has a reason to do something… Sometimes being with the person we love will hurt us more than if we are separated from them… Maybe he loves me, it`s just a possibility now, but there is a truth about him now, he wants to be with you…if he really loves me, but he chose you over me, doesn’t that mean he loves you more?” I asked.
“Don’t get me wrong, it`s not because I don’t want him or I don’t love him anymore… I do want him and love him so much…I just want to let him do whatever he wants. He has suffered a lot, if he thought that he will be happy by being with you, then I`ll try to be happy for him."
"I want just one thing from you, please don’t let him suffer anymore. We can`t bear when he is hurt, right?” I asked and he nodded, I smiled to him, the first smile after these past 6 years. A smile that erased all the grudges between us, a smile that was the same as a sign…that I let Aiba Masaki go, completely…to pursue his own happiness, because he deserved it, he deserved more than happiness…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~********~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I didn’t bring a lot of stuff, just a suitcase with my clothes, which I packed some days ago. I walked slowly and stopped near my window, the snow had piled up outside. My thoughts were wandering around again, to the day when I was still together with him. When I could still hug him freely, or the taste of his lips on mine… Could I forget about him someday? And think about him while smiling or think of everything I did with him as of just a memory? Will a day come, when I can move on?
Someone knocked on my door.
“Come in…”
My butler opened the door and bowed, “It`s time, young master. Two hours earlier, just as you asked.”
I nodded, “Okay. We will stop at my high school.”
He bowed, “Yes, young master.”
The snow made the pace the car was riding become slower. But after 15 minutes my car stopped in front of my high school’s gate. I lift my hand to sign that there’s no need to open my door for me, nor follow me inside.
I opened the door by myself, it was hard to walk through the snow piles. My pants were damp when I reached the building, it was Sunday so no one was there. I walked slowly along the corridor and felt lot of memories flooding my head. I passed my resting room, they had kept that useless room exactly like how I left it, I thought; they hadn’t changed it.
I kept walking and climbed the stairs to the rooftop. It was probably crazy to go there while it was snowing like there’d be no tomorrow. But I had no time… I opened the door and walked out. There were some snow piles in the corners of the rooftop, I stood up there, it was funny how I could fill my heart with the warmest memory of him in the coldest place.
When I thought it was enough, I walked back to my car. I couldn’t really remember what I did after that, but I reached the airport early. I walked slowly while my butler followed me from behind. I told Nino and Ohno not to escort me to the airport, but we had a party, I didn’t understand the purpose of the party, probably just a farewell party? Because we never really had been separated before, at least I had never left Japan for such long time before.
“Do you want to wait here, young master?” my butler asked me.
“Yes,” I thought about it for a while, “Yes, I`ll wait here…”
It was really stupid as I’d made sure before that no one would stop me this time, but I really wanted someone to stop me and persuade me to not leave Japan. I wanted to be stopped by someone who would say that he needs me here. Or probably I just wanted to be stopped by Aiba, though I knew it didn’t even make sense, we were over…
I glanced at my watch, it was time to go, I stood up, “Have a nice trip, young master…” my butler said and bowed.
“Thank you,” I walked slowly to the gate… I slowly closed my eyes and opened them again. I would leave this place, the place where Aiba existed… I’d strengthen my heart to walk in the world without him…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~********~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aiba`s POV
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~********~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I`ll disable the comment on this POV...prepare your weapon, I`m ready if you want to kill me...XD
go ahead on Aiba`s POV, and you`re free to kill me after you read it ^.^