I Gave At The Office (One Day At A Time)
Note: times given were recalculated from RRS (Imperial Main Time), which is 26.7 hours, and not this godless, nightmare, 32.3 hour ShaKwai cycle. To compensate for lack of available data, times RRS have been transposed into the 'Fleet 24-hr structure as much as possible.
Text only, very simply encrypted on the only available input device.
[[01:00]] Bolt awake. Roll over. Stare intently to determine if captain is breathing.
[[01:15]] Definitely breathing, if restless. Relax very slowly. Roll the other way. Keep between captain and the door.
[[01:28 - 04:15]] Doze. Dream. Watch that door. It's planning something. Fall asleep for good and end up rolled flat on your stomach.
[[04:15 - 05:00]] The sun's not up yet and it's already too hot. There also seems to be wood in this pencil...
[[05:00 - 05:08]] Meh. Ignore.
[[06:00]] Breakfast should be here by now. They like to start early.
[[06:15]] Breakfast still hasn't arrived. Is this the day--have they finally poisoned the food?
[[06:20]] Captain's awake, scowling and muttering about which Thaessu to kill for a decent cup of hholaer. It is now officially Tuesday.
[[06:45]] Breakfast. You can tell it's breakfast because breakfast leaves are wrapped in white paper instead of brown.
[[07:10]] Really would kill some Vulcans for that coffee. Tell the guard this in Standard.
[[07:15]] Guard never says anything. Never even blinks. Not even for funny faces.
[[07:21]] Begin calling him Rob and asking how he likes it here, just for conversation.
[[07:25]] So, Rob. What are your thoughts on yaoi?
[[07:28]] Ushered out in record time! Rob sure is pushy. It's always the quiet ones.
[[07:35]] We're always the only prisoners hitting the showers. We're probably the only prisoners in the whole facility. It's eerie.
[[07:38]] Soap does not belong on the floor. It is only natural to bend down and retreive it. Slowly.
[[07:42]] At least the captain is finally laughing at something. And, after all, you did do it on purpose.
[[07:50]] Did that really just happen? Nose kisses are glorious. ♥
[[08:15]] Yardwork is not nearly as glorious. Hedge duty.
[[08:18]] Glare at housing units.
[[08:21]] Resist urge to trim lovely white picket fence. By stomping on it.
[[08:21 --]] Pruning and other duties executed flawlessly, until...
[[09:15]] Frightened infant sehlat will not come down from tree. Boy is visibly distressed about this, despite stiff expression.
[[09:17]] Reassure boy awkwardly, while while trying to look capable climbing this tree's meaner older brother. In only leather pants and a harness. (Stay clothed? And risk THIS jacket? Not on your life!)
[[09:21]] Sehlat appears to be laughing. Only, silently. It's definitely grinning its smug bear face off. Boy does not look impressed. Or remotely convinced. Soldier bravely onward and upward! Those fucking bears can smell fear.
[[09:28]] Nearly lose an eye to a backlashing branch. Angry tree is angry!
[[09:31]] Sehlat still won't come down. By this time, captain has arrived to assist and there seem to be more onlookers.
[[09:34]] ...Sir? Wh-where you going?
[[09:43]] More gear is the solution! Captain is brilliant.
[[09:45]] Behold, the power of chainsaw!
[[09:46]] And of falling to own doom.
[[10:00]] Elements, if you have any mercy within you, you will let me die.
[[10:15]] Sehlat returned to boy. Thorns mostly removed. Dignity: will never recover.
[[10:25--]] Lunch. Spent mostly trying to find new position to sit.
[[11:15--]] Why do they want these in triplicate? The anklets constantly transmit where we are.
[[12:21]] Seriously, what is the purpose of this activity?
[[12:45]] Almost finished!
[[12:46]] System dump?! SYSTEM DUMP!?
[[13:30]] That parameter is invalid; please standby indefinitely.
[[13:38]] It seems to be some kind of infinite loop calling out instead of in.
[[13:50]] Fail to isolate loop because the fvadta thing IS ALL IN VULCAN. OLD HIGH VULCAN. G SHARP? HOW DOES THAT HELP.
[[14:04]] This. Must be what going mad feels like.
[[14:10]] Substitute the following message in all corrections department timesheets for today's date: /* Decalithium (n.): 1. The cause of, and solution to, all our problems. */
[[14:15]] Break for water.
[[14:18]] We have another twelve minutes; Rob and Company appear sufficiently preoccupied.
[[14:21]] HOSE FIGHT! :D
[[14:28]] Half-drowned by captain. Clotheslined by Rob. Written up. I regret nothing.
[[14:31 --]] Act contrite. Captain rolls eyes, apparently to be certain that they are in working order.
[[15:30]] Mow lawns. Such lawns as there are. Stone-gardens are the captain's department.
[[16:15]] Break for water. Guards are "perfectly aware of" us--Rob's exact phrase--and staring like hungry mogai.
[[16:16]] Captain formally forbids attacking Rob with hose.
[[16:17]] Captain is just out of sorts because I was winning that time.
[[16:17:50]]...Captain heard that.
[[17:23]] If they plan to kill us with boredom, they're going to succeed.
[[18:00]] Finished for the day.
[[18:05]] Ah, civilization! Hot and cold running sand-fleas and all the concrete we'd ever want to sleep on.
[[18:08]] Except, of course, showers first.
[[18:12]] Rob does not seem fond of Who Let The Dogs Out. Judging by the way he's pounding on that door.
[[18:16]] Seriously, Rob? Who doesn't like Klingon opera? Besides you.
[[18:17]] Captain, it is a proven scientific fact: your face will stick that way.
[[18:20]] Have you talked with Helen about this irrational urge to drown me?
[[18:50]] I regret nothing. Also, finally dry.
[[18:52]] And dressed. And singing.
[[19:00]] Rob is going to put in for a transfer. Soon. I can sense it.
[[19:05]] Dinner! It always arrives in mysterious brown packages. What could it be?
[[19:06]] No, no, there has to have been some mistake.
[[19:07]] Why yes, yes it is! MORE LEAVES.
[[19:18]] Unfortunately, sir? Murder is not the path to eggs instead.
[[19:30]] Nap. Carefully. On any place not aching from thorns. Right. Bridge of the nose it is.
[[20:20]] Screw it, awake now. Backdating this log. Another nice note may also be in order, too.
[[21:00]] A psychiatrist has transferred you to a Starbase! Is this awesome y/y?
Last Entry at [[22:50]]
Dear Diary,
Today, I was pompous and the captain was crazy. We were kidnapped by station folk, never to be seen again, and it was the best day ever.
Text only, very simply encrypted on the only available input device.
[[01:00]] Bolt awake. Roll over. Stare intently to determine if captain is breathing.
[[01:15]] Definitely breathing, if restless. Relax very slowly. Roll the other way. Keep between captain and the door.
[[01:28 - 04:15]] Doze. Dream. Watch that door. It's planning something. Fall asleep for good and end up rolled flat on your stomach.
[[04:15 - 05:00]] The sun's not up yet and it's already too hot. There also seems to be wood in this pencil...
[[05:00 - 05:08]] Meh. Ignore.
[[06:00]] Breakfast should be here by now. They like to start early.
[[06:15]] Breakfast still hasn't arrived. Is this the day--have they finally poisoned the food?
[[06:20]] Captain's awake, scowling and muttering about which Thaessu to kill for a decent cup of hholaer. It is now officially Tuesday.
[[06:45]] Breakfast. You can tell it's breakfast because breakfast leaves are wrapped in white paper instead of brown.
[[07:10]] Really would kill some Vulcans for that coffee. Tell the guard this in Standard.
[[07:15]] Guard never says anything. Never even blinks. Not even for funny faces.
[[07:21]] Begin calling him Rob and asking how he likes it here, just for conversation.
[[07:25]] So, Rob. What are your thoughts on yaoi?
[[07:28]] Ushered out in record time! Rob sure is pushy. It's always the quiet ones.
[[07:35]] We're always the only prisoners hitting the showers. We're probably the only prisoners in the whole facility. It's eerie.
[[07:38]] Soap does not belong on the floor. It is only natural to bend down and retreive it. Slowly.
[[07:42]] At least the captain is finally laughing at something. And, after all, you did do it on purpose.
[[07:50]] Did that really just happen? Nose kisses are glorious. ♥
[[08:15]] Yardwork is not nearly as glorious. Hedge duty.
[[08:18]] Glare at housing units.
[[08:21]] Resist urge to trim lovely white picket fence. By stomping on it.
[[08:21 --]] Pruning and other duties executed flawlessly, until...
[[09:15]] Frightened infant sehlat will not come down from tree. Boy is visibly distressed about this, despite stiff expression.
[[09:17]] Reassure boy awkwardly, while while trying to look capable climbing this tree's meaner older brother. In only leather pants and a harness. (Stay clothed? And risk THIS jacket? Not on your life!)
[[09:21]] Sehlat appears to be laughing. Only, silently. It's definitely grinning its smug bear face off. Boy does not look impressed. Or remotely convinced. Soldier bravely onward and upward! Those fucking bears can smell fear.
[[09:28]] Nearly lose an eye to a backlashing branch. Angry tree is angry!
[[09:31]] Sehlat still won't come down. By this time, captain has arrived to assist and there seem to be more onlookers.
[[09:34]] ...Sir? Wh-where you going?
[[09:43]] More gear is the solution! Captain is brilliant.
[[09:45]] Behold, the power of chainsaw!
[[09:46]] And of falling to own doom.
[[10:00]] Elements, if you have any mercy within you, you will let me die.
[[10:15]] Sehlat returned to boy. Thorns mostly removed. Dignity: will never recover.
[[10:25--]] Lunch. Spent mostly trying to find new position to sit.
[[11:15--]] Why do they want these in triplicate? The anklets constantly transmit where we are.
[[12:21]] Seriously, what is the purpose of this activity?
[[12:45]] Almost finished!
[[12:46]] System dump?! SYSTEM DUMP!?
[[13:30]] That parameter is invalid; please standby indefinitely.
[[13:38]] It seems to be some kind of infinite loop calling out instead of in.
[[13:50]] Fail to isolate loop because the fvadta thing IS ALL IN VULCAN. OLD HIGH VULCAN. G SHARP? HOW DOES THAT HELP.
[[14:04]] This. Must be what going mad feels like.
[[14:10]] Substitute the following message in all corrections department timesheets for today's date: /* Decalithium (n.): 1. The cause of, and solution to, all our problems. */
[[14:15]] Break for water.
[[14:18]] We have another twelve minutes; Rob and Company appear sufficiently preoccupied.
[[14:21]] HOSE FIGHT! :D
[[14:28]] Half-drowned by captain. Clotheslined by Rob. Written up. I regret nothing.
[[14:31 --]] Act contrite. Captain rolls eyes, apparently to be certain that they are in working order.
[[15:30]] Mow lawns. Such lawns as there are. Stone-gardens are the captain's department.
[[16:15]] Break for water. Guards are "perfectly aware of" us--Rob's exact phrase--and staring like hungry mogai.
[[16:16]] Captain formally forbids attacking Rob with hose.
[[16:17]] Captain is just out of sorts because I was winning that time.
[[16:17:50]]...Captain heard that.
[[17:23]] If they plan to kill us with boredom, they're going to succeed.
[[18:00]] Finished for the day.
[[18:05]] Ah, civilization! Hot and cold running sand-fleas and all the concrete we'd ever want to sleep on.
[[18:08]] Except, of course, showers first.
[[18:12]] Rob does not seem fond of Who Let The Dogs Out. Judging by the way he's pounding on that door.
[[18:16]] Seriously, Rob? Who doesn't like Klingon opera? Besides you.
[[18:17]] Captain, it is a proven scientific fact: your face will stick that way.
[[18:20]] Have you talked with Helen about this irrational urge to drown me?
[[18:50]] I regret nothing. Also, finally dry.
[[18:52]] And dressed. And singing.
[[19:00]] Rob is going to put in for a transfer. Soon. I can sense it.
[[19:05]] Dinner! It always arrives in mysterious brown packages. What could it be?
[[19:06]] No, no, there has to have been some mistake.
[[19:07]] Why yes, yes it is! MORE LEAVES.
[[19:18]] Unfortunately, sir? Murder is not the path to eggs instead.
[[19:30]] Nap. Carefully. On any place not aching from thorns. Right. Bridge of the nose it is.
[[20:20]] Screw it, awake now. Backdating this log. Another nice note may also be in order, too.
[[21:00]] A psychiatrist has transferred you to a Starbase! Is this awesome y/y?
Last Entry at [[22:50]]
Dear Diary,
Today, I was pompous and the captain was crazy. We were kidnapped by station folk, never to be seen again, and it was the best day ever.