circumstance conspires against all my unthinking resolutions; radical u-turns are halfway appropriate ( Read more... )

"lately i'm into circuitry;
what it means to be
made of you but not
enough for you"

sitting up here at work, talking to jane about old films. (she made me a cup-a-soup, and didn't crease or stutter when i told her that my appointment next tuesday is at chorlton house, the manchester mental health hq.) outside, there's a car alarm, or maybe it's the reverse signal on one of the diggers on the construction site, which is sounding a ( Read more... )

what do you expect me to say?

the thunder sounds like explosions, a faraway war; a tiger's growl; running across an echoey room.

the air is electric. i'm trapped up here in this tiny room, tense. the air is still.

i'm getting used to splashy days again, but rain in this city is duller; less lush than exeter rainstorms. i showered during an exeter rainstorm on saturday; bathroom window open, clouds darkening the sky. and then, as saturday and sunday blurred into an indiscriminate sleeplessness, i lit sparklers in a bus-shelter, staring at the puddles ( Read more... )

everything is somewhat beautiful, in a poignant and / or confusing sort of way. i love making plans, i love to be this loved. i had a gorgeous two weeks at anne's house, and i'm going there again soon ('random night' with anne + spiller = conceptual heaven ( Read more... )

this entry is gone, because nobody seems to know when to keep their fucking mouth shut.

(least of all myself!!)

x

( Read more... )

today was a band practice day (i'm a member in spirit if not in instrumentation, and besides, mark was playing my bass guitar). it was overwhelming in a lot of ways, not least of which was the realisation that ohmygoodness they could really do something with this. and they've always been good, but today they were beyond that, and i closed my eyes ( Read more... )