HOUSE OF SIN - The Diary of Uke Yutaka : CHAPTER 19 PART 2

[luna_no_koibito]

Title: HOUSE OF SIN - The Diary of Uke Yutaka
Chapters: 19.2 / 22
Author: luna_no_koibito
Genre: Human drama, romance, war, angst.
Warnings:  men/men relationship, cursing, sex, violence, incest.
Rating: from PG -15 to NC-17 (Depending on chapter)
Pairing: Revealing this might spoil the story just yet ... suggest looking at the character list (^_^)!
Bands: the GazettE, Dir En Grey, X-Japan, Nightmare, An Cafe', Alice Nine, Kra, SuG.
Disclaimer: I don't own them, and don't wish I did because I'd be sorry for what could befall them （・＿・；）！
Summary:
  MAIN

CHAPTER 19 PART 1


How was he not supposed to rejoice in the happiness of his loved ones? Especially now that all his siblings, one by one, seemed to be finding some sort of happy ending, or encouraging new beginning. Was this not the reason why he had endured all the craziness he'd seen unfolded under the roof of his once beloved home? Was it not for this? Was it not because there was nothing as important to Kazuhiro as the happiness of his family as a whole? Was it not?

He has something special, that kid, I tell you had said Dr. Niikura describing Yutaka before he had been commissioned to come. According to the doctor, the apprentice's simplicity and inexperience was bound to start a chain reaction of changes, and whether these changes would have been of the good or bad kind, the doctor did not know. It was the only thing he was not quite sure about, but they both, him and Kazuhiro, hoped in best, and agreed that some change, at this point, was better than none.

As he stood there, well hidden, dazing at the newly found happiness of his brother Akira, and their apprentice, he wondered why his own face seemed to be permanently fixed in almost appall, instead of a content smile. Why was he feeling something more akin to despair and rage, rather than relief and gratitude. So then he wondered and questioned; why had the wave of changed stopped just before it reached himself? He had indeed promised the apprentice that he would have changed as well, he would have been more active, but how was he to do that in clothes that weren't his? And there it was, a bittersweet smile surfacing into his rigid features, changes? For himself? Finally getting read of being Ayumi, in such a way, risking having his mother commit who knew what other atrocity towards her beloved, not to mention herself?

No he could not. Differently from everyone else, there was no "naïve apprentice", no sweet talk, no confession that could get him out of his own predicament. As long as there would be a Lady Namie Hayashi, so would Ayumi Hayashi.

“Who would have said ...” suddenly spoke a somewhat jovial voice from behind the blond, whom lost in his thought, quickly turned to face none other than his Uncle Kouyou “... those two, kneeling in each other's embrace, instead of getting at each other's neck ...” nonchalantly kept professing the elder, glancing at Kazuhiro every now and then.

“And it is great, is it not? ...” cheerfully exclaimed the long haired blond with a broad smile, decidedly picking up his gown, swiftly turning around, and beginning to speedily walk away. The last thing he needed was an someone, who was incredibly clever in rubbing in the obvious “... but spying on others isn't a good manner, particularly for a lady” he forcefully chuckled, once he sensed the elder brunette, calmly following him

“Then, good a thing either of us in one, is it not … Kazuhiro?” nonchalantly stated the brunette, at which the blond bitterly smirked to himself, but kept quiet “... have you any urgent business Kazuhiro? You seem in great hurry all of a sudden … ” loudly inquired the elder “because if not, I demand you keep me company” he then requested in a slight forceful way. Kazuhiro could have lied, come up with something as he had been used to for the past eighteen years. Yet, something told him that the elder would have not cared for any of his reason. Thus, trying to avoid unnecessary complications, against his will, the blond stopped, and awaited for the elder to join his side. At his arrival, they smiled at each other, in the unnervingly polite way in which two ladies were apt to in order to avoid having to speak ill of each other, and then, silently, they simply stood there “Uh ...” loudly and listlessly sighed the brunette, looking around a bit, and then scrupulously inspecting his nails. Kazuhiro had no idea what was on his uncles mind, but whatever it be, he seriously wasn't in the mood to be toyed with at the moment, which was very likely to be the case.

“I was of the impression you had something to tell me Uncle Kouyou ...” cautiously observed the blond, turning to look at the elder, who blinked a couple as if he had suddenly acknowledged his presence “... well perhaps I was wrong, so if you would excuse me” he said in a hurry, bowed, and was about to resume walking when the elder began to speak once more.

“It irks me to a great extent when you act like a lady around me Kazuhiro ...” plainly stated the brunette “... you never do that, so why right now? I am seriously irritated ...” kept professing the elder, as he held that smile, which Kazuhiro was sure was meant to repress a very unsightly scowl “but … it is not your fault I suppose, you did not choose to be a woman … who does? ...” he then spoke in a more neutral tone, as if talking to himself “However, my dear Kazuhiro ...” smiled the elder, taking the blond arm under his, directing them towards the front of the house, as if they were a couple of betroth taking a stroll “... this will end today” he concluded in high spirits, widely smiling at the younger.

“Excuse me? ...” quickly replied the blond, whom halted them both, by keeping his stance, and firmly looking up at the elder, while forcefully withdrawing his arm. He knew he was up to something, and a big part of him also knew exactly it was a matter concerning his being Ayumi. The same part of him that deep deep down inside was currently beginning, imploring, his uncle to free him from all of these. But the risks were too great. He just couldn't, and the sooner he accepted it, the better.

“I said ...” firmly repeated the elder, opening the front door, and taking a peek outside “... This. Ends. Today.” repeated the elder, putting emphasized on each word, as he looked sternly into Kazuhiro's trouble gaze “... do not look at me with those indignant eyes my young lad, as if you had not seen this coming …” seriously expressed the brunette “... as if there were not a part of you, just dying to kill Ayumi if it could” he then concluded, newly turning to peek out.

“I cannot see how you could decide such a thing Uncle, without my consent” rigidly exclaimed the blond “... do you understand what you are saying? Do you not care about mother's well being? I will not stop being Ayumi, and that is it” challenged Kazuhiro, half hissing in a slightly over angry tone, glaring up at the brunette, whom however look unaffected, and seemingly searching for something out in the distance.

“Should be right about ...” lowly stated Uncle Kouyou, pulling out his pocket watch, and then looking up “... now. Never too early, never late” he satisfyingly smiled, then took a couple of steps away from the opened door, towards Kazuhiro “So my darling here is the deal. We can do this two ways ...” he sarcastically smiled, and as usual to the blond's dismay, he completely disregarded what he had to say in the matter “The better way, or my way, and believe me, knowing you, my way is probably to be avoided … even though if you ask me, my way is uh ...” he terminated in a obscene sigh, fanning himself as if he'd just seen something very lewd present itself in front of him “... now the better way, would be you coming up with me to your mother and telling her that you have been, you are and always will be … a boy” he then concluded, standing up straight, silent and smiling, waiting for a reply from the beetle-browed blond.

“You have heard my reply in the matter Uncle Kouyou ...” blankly replied Kazuhiro, strongly keeping his ground, as he suddenly heard the sound of a carriage approach their estate.

“Well then … my way it is” disappointingly grinned the elder “... I wonder though … when will you all ever learn, to listen to some of your elders … I mean you listen to Kaoru all the time, what is that supposed to mean?” he accused in feign offense as he turned towards the doors. Kazuhiro turned to make a speedy retreat, when he felt his uncle pull him by the wrist, and drag him outside the mansion where a seemingly quite costly carriage entered their estate, a few second later stopping right in front of them. Then, with an elegance and regard which he probably had only witnessed the royal family assume, one of the most handsome man he'd seen was ushered from the carriage by its driver. He was a stunning man indeed, and for some reason, he had the feeling they had met before.

“Gackt ...” serenely called Uncle Kouyou, smiling at the guest, whom lightly bowed at them, and returned the warm smile.

“As soon as I had known had returned I tried my best to get a moment to come and see you ... Kouyou” calmly stated the newly arrived, whom the blond couldn't stop dazing at, in an attempt to recall where had he seen such an illustrious looking person.

“Never mind that, the important matter is that you made it ...” reassured the long-haired brunette, after which he took a step aside to put Kazuhiro in full view, and resumed talking “... and here, as you may remember, is my most adorable, precious and beautiful niece … Ayumi” concluded the elder, at which the other man gracefully walked towards Kazuhiro, skilfully grabbed his hand, and kissed it.

“Hardly am I apt to forget the face of beauty when seen once ...” he confidently stated, releasing Kazuhiro's hand, whom suddenly was feeling incredibly uncomfortable, as he watched his Uncle Kouyou walk to stand next to their guest.

“These notable presence my dear Ayumi, is Dr. Gackt Camui … from what I heard, he had been here once already … during Takeru's birthday I believe ...” nonchalantly introduced the shorter brunette.

“On that occasion however, I spent most of my stay talking to another of your siblings Miss Hayashi, the incredibly talented Takanori Hayashi … whom I wish would still change his mind and join us but ...” carefully stated the doctor, at which Kazuhiro politely smiled.

“Enough with that ...” quickly announced Uncle Kouyou “... let us go inside” he then stated as they began to walk inside.

“I shall go and call father and mother-” instantly suggested Kazuhiro, who however was swiftly interrupted by the shorter brunette.

“That will not be necessary my darling, you see ...” he then took her arm into his, as they continue to walk inside the mansion, in a direction of the house that would never be used to welcome such a notable presence like Dr. Camui, Kazuhiro observed “... Dr. Camui came here on my account, but mostly … on yours” he finally smiled, as they stopped in front of one of their rarely used small living rooms, in the east wing of the mansion.

“M-mine? ...” stuttered the blond in a mist of shock, and horror, quickly glancing up at the doctor, whom stood amidst them keeping his peace. Uncle Kouyou merely smiled, opening the door to the cute little living room, which main theme was white, with intricate design of red roses, on couches, table clothes, and the wallpaper as well, the carpet was salmon color. It had two very wide windows which faced the garden of red flowers, and on the right side against the wall, there was a white pianoforte. Kazuhiro couldn't remembered having entered this living room at all.

“Well then if you would excuse me, I will go check on the condition of my two Indian men, whom need to be ...” suddenly paused Uncle Kouou seemingly trying to search for an appropriate word to use “... fed” he then concluded with a wide grin, and before Kazuhiro could even react to anything at all, the shorter brunette was outside the now closed door, a second after which a clicking sound could be heard. Uncle Kouyou had just locked him inside, with Dr. Camui. His corset suddenly became incredibly tight and majorly uneasy.

Out of instinct, Kazuhiro rushed to the door, and pressed the handle, just to find out what the he had previously already concluded. They truly were locked inside, and now he had no idea what to do. Though he had been trained in the proper mannerism to assume when around a gentlemen, he never had an occasion to properly do as much. He never thought he'd have to. His plan was to maybe join the church, or anything that would prevent her himself from being in any situation which could rapidly become intimately, since unlike ninety-nine percent of his family; he was actually heterosexual “It appears that we are lock--” tried to point out the blond, but he was properly interjected by the tall brunette, whom was standing in the middle of the room, staring him down.

“I hear, that you play the piano … Miss Hayashi” he began “... in fact, your Uncle Kouyou, talked so much and extensively about your piano skills … I would love to hear you play” he finally smiled, in a very genuine, quite harmless way. Yet, the last thing Kazuhiro wanted, was to get anywhere close to that piano where the man was now standing expectantly, and still, sweetly smiling. Undoubtedly, he was scared. Suddenly, the blond wished that the house could fall upon them, that the ground could collapse; that he could vanish. Just what exactly was his dear Uncle Kouyou thinking of? Oh, he had an idea alright.

Hardly swallowing, he slowly approached the pianoforte, in the same way a death penalty prisoner would have approached their room were the sentence would be carried out. Once he sat, he pulled up the wooden cover of the piano, removed the red Velcro that served to cover the keyboard, and stared at the keys. Before he began, he slowly breathed and looked up at the elder, his eyes pleading, for what he had no idea, because as it was, the situation was nothing more than a man asking a miss to play the piano. Perfectly innocent. But the door of the room was locked, he had not known about the sudden interest of the doctor; and he wasn’t a woman.

Sitting on the far end of the stool, on the opposite of where the doctor was, he began a sonata, which was meant to sound more cheerful, but ended up having a rather dark tone to it, because of the low octaves he was playing on. Then, somewhere in the middle of the piece Dr. Camui suddenly sat next to him, which made him stop abruptly, and turn towards the elder, leaning away in fear. However, all that the doctor did was place his hands on the keyboard and began to play a melody that went along with what he was playing. He then turned towards him, smiled, and made sign for him to continue. So Kazuhiro did. They played together for a good amount of time, simply played, and all along, Kazuhiro couldn't help but think that what they were doing was quite nice, even endearing.

“Well was that not invigorating?” he then exclaimed more than question when they had finished, turning to serenely grin at the blond.

“Yes, yes indeed ...” genuinely replied Kazuhiro, not quite knowing how to behave from now on.

“You are a very charming person ...” then stated Dr. Camui, as he resumed to play, a slow piece, very light sounding because of the side of the piano he was on “... making this so very complicated for me” he then smirked, keeping his focus on the keyboard “... if I were to follow your uncle's antics, right now ...” he paused for a second, performing a rather skilful maneuver, which brought his left hand back and forth from the low octaves to the middle ones “... I should be flirting you into submission, and if like predicted you were to resist ...” he newly paused, performing a more dramatic part of the sonata “... I was to attempt raping you” he calmly stated, as if he were explaining the regular procedure of a surgical operation “... some interesting character your uncle do you not think?” he then questioned, as he relaxingly proceeded his performance, but Kazuhiro couldn't reply. He was scared out of his mind, and even though it seemed he was going to be abused, he still feared that something else would be done.

Why was he petrified? He was supposed to find a way to bolt out of the room, instead of simply staying there, terrifyingly silent, staring at the piano keys waiting for something to befall him. God, what had he done to deserve this? Most of all, how could his uncle do this to him. Gradually, the sonata was coming to an end, and after the doctor had played a few single notes, his fingers then stopped. The elder then breathed out, regularly, slowly, and calmly, after which he turned towards the blond, whom jolted at the action.

“Are you sexually attracted to men … Kazuhiro?” suddenly questioned the elder, a hinge of seriousness in his question, as the blond stared at him wide-eyed, wondering why he knew his name, which meant he also knew he wasn't a woman. What exactly was going on? As he kept silent, the brunette resumed playing.

“No … I am not” suddenly replied the blond, almost in a whisper, as he stopped gawking at the elder, while turning to look forward.

“I am ...” calmly replied the man “... actually I also fancy women … so I do not know how you would define me … I guess you could say I am a spirit lover? I am happy with whatever body I am presented to love, and go straight for their soul. I attack, and make it mine ...” he began to explain, with a touch of hilarity in his voice tone “... but I know my boundaries … so please do relax, nothing is going to happen to you, not with your uncle around, that is a certainty ...” he then reassured, with a slight playful wink “... I am surprised you even went as far to believe that this uncle of yours would allow me to even touch a hair of yours, not to talk about rape” he then professed in a lightly disbelieving tone “... he would have my head on a silver platter … and my genitalia for dessert” he concluded, as he kept playing.

“Then ...” hesitantly began to speak the blond, trying to make sense out of the whole situation, and suddenly feeling incredibly guilty and ashamed for having regarded his truly dear Uncle Kouyou so lowly “... for what reason are we here … locked in this room?” he finally inquired, quickly glancing at the elder, whose eyes turned in his direction for a second, and then back to the keyboard.

“Right at the moment ...” solemnly began the elder, as the sonata slowed down in pace “... your uncle is telling your mother, that Ayumi died in a tragic incident” he concluded, making Kazuhiro instantly stand on his feet, dash towards the locked door, and use all the force he had to try and open it.

“No ...” he angrily hissed “No!” he then shouted a little louder, as he began to hit the door with his shoulder “... No, Uncle Kouyou do not! God! No!” he desperately shouted, hitting the door with his hands in all his frustration, and stopped for a second suddenly feeling a wave of nausea take him over “... Why … why … why would he do so? Mother …” he then painfully whispered, sliding down to the ground, and stayed there absently staring at the salmon carpet.

The room gently went still, as the doctor calmly concluded his sonata, and finally closed the piano. What was Kazuhiro to do now? His mother would certainly have a fit, she would go crazy, and then … and then …

“Is it really? …” suddenly inquired Dr. Camui, as Kazuhiro heard a few steps waking further from himself “... is it the well being of your mother you are truly concerned with, Kazuhiro?” he then inquired, his voice almost accusing, held a rigidity, which for some reason awakened an anger that the blond had no idea he harbored.

“What do you mean sire?” angrily retorted Kazuhiro, snapping his head at the elder “... whom else would I be distressing over?! “ he then shouted, his voice almost chocking in his throat as signs of a stressful cry appeared.

“Yourself”{ plainly and calmly stated the doctor, whom was facing the window, and slowly turned around to look down at Kazuhiro, whom was still on the floor looking up at him in disbelieve and offense.

“Myself ...” slowly repeated the blond, lightly shaking his head at the absurdity he thought he just heard the elder say. How dare he?

“Children are meant to outlive their parents ...” resumed the doctor, folding his arms behind his back, his gaze still quite fixed on Kazuhiro “... either it be today, either it be in thirty years time, both your parents will perish, that is just the nature of things. There is not a parent, in a normal and healthy state of mind, whom would want to see their children perish before themselves ...” continued the elder, as he began slowly walking towards the blond “... thus parents provide their children with all the means necessary to be able to maintain themselves in that event … health, a good education, moral and financial support, all in order to someday rest in peace knowing that they will be alright” he paused for a second as he then stood right in front of Kazuhiro “... what can you tell for yourself Kazuhiro? What is your plan? What does your future entail? What will you be when your mother will follow the natural course of time and die?” he then concluded, looking down at the younger.

Try as he might, Kazuhiro didn't know how to reply, for the reality of things was that he hadn't thought of it, and as he quickly thought about it, he absolutely had no idea of what would become of him, when that day would arrive. And whose fault was that? He hadn't chose to live this lie, he had been force into this life, he was trying to do good, he'd been convinced that he would be doing the right thing by doing so. Thus, how dare did this doctor, or anyone else in fact, judge him? They had no idea of the hell he'd gone true all these years, for something he hadn't brought on himself. As things were standing in that very moment, he hated everything and everyone, because nobody would and could understand. They should all perish. He himself should perish.

“Meant you were not to live for your mother Kazuhiro ...” kindly stated the doctor stooping besides him “... Human beings  make innumerable and grandiose mistakes, and what they have done to you is unmistakably one. Your mother is mentally ill. Refusing to see such a obvious fact, and having allowed her to proceed in life as if it was normal, by ruining your life, should not have been allowed, but it is not too late ...” he softly stated, as tears silently streamed down the blond's cheeks; tears of joy for an unexpected freedom “... you need to feel no shame in wanting to grab your life in your hands, it is your right, and you should do as much” he explained, as the blond breathed out, and looked up at the doctor, whom extended a hand at him, which Kazuhiro accepted as he was brought back on his feet. Was he truly being told that he could live life for himself? Was he being told that he had a life?

“What about … mother …?” he then hesitantly questioned, perhaps out of habit; that had been his major concern himself for over eighteen years now.

“The object of my visit today, under consent from your father, is to take you mother to a mental institution ...” he cautiously stated, and quickly resumed before Kazuhiro could question anything “... she will be in special care, I will personally be taking care of her, and I'll do all in my power find any treatment if any ...” he began to explain “... to think that al of this could have been avoided by simply admitting that there was a problem …” he sighed perhaps thinking about his father, Kazuhiro conjectured “... but love, love will do this to people as well, it will blind your mind, silence reason, and any a time cause dismay, so if you can in future … do not resent your father too much for the choice he made, which was wrong indeed, but not meant in with bad intentions” he concluded, drying a few tears from the blond visage “... your heterosexuality is such a let down at the moment my dear” he then joked, making the younger slightly smile.

Then the doctor went past Kazuhiro, ringing out a small key from his pocket he unlocked the door “... I will not inquire as to why you had a key to this room ...” calmly smiled the blond, suddenly fearing having to actually exit the room, to enter into the same old mansion, which however, would never be the same “I-” tried to resume the younger when a scream suddenly broke out. Kazuhiro quickly paled.

“This should be my cue ...” seriously stated the doctor “... I will be taking your mother with me, and it may not be the best sight, so you can choose to stay here if you will, until we are gone ...” he professed, at which Kazuhiro swallowed. He was sure that the sight would have been ugly, it probably would have broke him down on the spot, but for some reason he needed, wanted, to see. As if seeing her mother been taken away was a true proof that Ayumi wold finally be gone as well.

As the walked towards the main stair, almost every other inhabitant of the house had gathered as the angry and desperate string of “Liar!”, “How dare you!”, “Ayumi!” filled the house, and son approached the ramp of stairs. Then all his siblings joined, and as he looked up the stairs there was his mother being held by his father. She was being brought down the stairs uncle Kouyou in tail.

“Stand away … she most not see you ...” quickly whispered the doctor, and before he stepped forward, he looked at him and whispered “... good luck with your life young man” he concluded smiling at him, after which he speed walked towards the stairs passing through the see of servants and house attendants to join the woman on her other side where the husband wasn't holding her, while Kazuhiro retreated behind on of the big columns a bit away from the ramp of stairs, silently watching as his mother was being brought down.

“Ayumi! My dear Ayumi … why?!” his mother kept crying out and screaming, as tears rolled down his own face. All of a sudden feeling the urge to run to her and tell her that he was alive and okay. Telling her to stop crying and that everything was going to be alright. Thus, he turned away, completely hiding himself behind the column, and silently cried his sorrow, his old life ... Ayumi ... away. Then the doors finally closed, the sound of a retreating carriage could be heard for a while, and no more. Silence.

Kazuhiro breathed in an out tentatively, staying still for a while, as he heard the scattering of servants and attendants. A few second later, he moved away from the column, and reappeared in the corridor, as he observed his siblings and father standing in the middle of the hallways right in front of the stairs silently staring at the closed door.

“Kazuhiro ...” gently called a mortified looking uncle Kouyou, making everyone turn in his direction “... darling ...” continued the long-haired brunette, as the blond finally joined them, and was embraced be his uncle, whom whispered in his ear “... it is all over now ...” and at those words, Kazuhiro hugged him back as if he were holding tight for his dear life, as his tears came out stronger and faster “... no more Ayumi, never again ...” he happily stated, pulling away from the younger, and cupping his face “... now it is only you Kazuhiro, finally only you” he concluded, all his siblings, Yutaka included, attempted a smile, seemingly not knowing quite what to say, but clearly happy for him.

“I may not in the position to say anything ...” began his father, standing a few feet away from the group, as if to keep a safety distance “... I do not expect you to forgive me either, but for what it is worth ...” he then paused and breathed out “... I am … immensely … sorry, Kazuhiro” he professed, and simply stood there, with Atsushi standing just a few feet behind him. Kazuhiro had never seen his father cry in his whole life, did not think he never would, and was suddenly wondering just how much self-restraint he'd always have to exercise in moments such as this, in which his eyes were clearly lucid. Then, without himself even acknowledging himself moving he walked towards his father and hugged him. His father silently, and strongly, embraced him as well.

Finally, the moment he had been waiting for all his life had arrived. They were all happy, or working towards being so, including himself. Things had finally changed, and it felt wonderful, such as his prospect for his new life, it almost sounded surreal. Finally, they had their happy ending.

Or at least so he had thought.

Carefully releasing himself from the embrace, his father lightly smiled at him, and silently took a few moments to look at all all his children. Then, he took a few steps backwards towards where Atsushi was standing, holding a folded roll of paper. Genral Hayashi then nudged his head slightly forward, towards his them, and Atsushi walked forward, unrolled the paper, which had been sealed by the royal emblem, and began to read.

Yasuno Hayashi, Akira Hayashi, Takahiro Hayashi

you are here being personally summoned,

by his highness King George II,

to join the war front in Spain, along side of the Kingdom's army.

Youa re to join Genral Yoshiki Hayashi's troops,

and report immediately.

Refusal to do so, will be regarded as betrayal,

you shall be persecuted, and imprisoned for treason.

May God bless England.

George 11 King of England.

Concluded Atsushi, rolling back the paper, and walking back to General Hayashi's side, as silence settled among them. Then, their father spoke “You have a day, to sort out any business or matter you need to attended … we shall be on her way the day after tomorrow. That is all” he concluded, and with Atsushi in toe, he walked away, none of brothers making a singe movements, or speaking a single word,

Kazuhiro looked at the faces of those whom had been summoned, and painfully witnessed no sign of shock, same as his other siblings. They had all known, from the very moment their father had returned, himself included, they had all known. All but their apprentice, whom had suddenly released his grasp around Akira's hand, and was looking as if someone had told him that someone dear had died, which sadly enough, could turn into a reality.

“You have a day ...” listlessly announced Uncle Kouyou, as if their father's words hadn't sunk in “... make the best of it” he then concluded, firmly holding Kazuhiro by his hand, whom was surprised to feel it slightly shaking, as he dragged them both away, leaving the rest of his siblings still silent and standing in the middle of the hallway “It is hard … I know … and I might sound insensitive at the moment, and I am sorry ...” he then lowly spoke, keeping his face away from the blond's sight “but life will have to continue, and yours has just began ...” he concluded, as they walked towards his own room.

Kazuhiro took a last look behind himself, as they walked up the ramp of stairs, for the first time in his life, not knowing what to wish for, and for whom, finding it now more than ever hard to rejoice in his little victory, realizing just how far their happy ending had been suddenly shoved. And at this point, he was seriously begin to wonder whether the gods, the stars or whomever and whatever, had ever even wrote one for them …

Was there ever going to be a happy ending for his family?

CHAPTER 20 PART 1

A/N: Finally, about time!!! some might say~! DON'T BLAME YOU And I apologize for the long wait.

Yet, it took me a while to properly write this, to convey Kazuhiro's feelings. No matter how much he wanted change, he hadn't included himself in the picture, and even though he subconsciously wanted to, and even though he had promised he would, Ayumi and his mother, were still a great wall, and a great excuse for him to not do so. So bye bye Ayumi, and bye-bye mother for now. Hello Kazuhiro and … hello war. (T T” ) ... Some of you had already known form the time he set foot into the house that it wasn't right, and had already connected it with war. Well for one I will promise that a couple is going to have a day to remember for sure (looks around wonders who …. lol)!

Three chapters to go! We are almost there … is there a happy ending for the Hayashi family? We'll find out.

Much Love -LnK♥(~_^ )/-