Six months as of today. Longer than other boys have lasted.

I've been so mad at him lately. I've been thinking that I wish that I could get away from him, leave him, let him leave me, but I can't because I need him to help pay my rent. Feel so incompatible sometimes. Feel so stuck.

I was reading his old writing. This is my favorite passage:

I love ( Read more... )

Today I was looking for a store that I couldn't quite remember the location of.  While searching for it I passed by several good coffeeshops, which had been thriving in Tucson for upwards of ten years, and found out that they had closed their doors. One of them had a sign out front which read: "We are the 64th restaurant in Tucson to go out of ( Read more... )

A friend of mine was found dead in his room this morning. No one knows the cause of his death yet, but most theories revolve around alcohol ( Read more... )

Living with Cole has become very frustrating. He is such a stick in the mud. This is not what I signed up for. Cole is a writer, a very good writer, who writes about exciting things he'd like to do. His writing is poetic and funny and adventurous. This is how I came to know him ( Read more... )

Cole came home from work today and curled up on the bed and said "I want to die" and hasn't moved at all since then ( Read more... )

Craig showed up at our house earlier, unexpectedly, with sockboy's dog. "We need a place to leave her," Craig said. "It's better if you don't ask why."
"Is [sockboy] ok?"
"No. And don't answer the phone if he tries to call you."

The dog, Cash, is a sweet dog but she is antsy here. She wants to know where her people are. Trevi the resident puppy is ( Read more... )

Drinking supposedly interferes with one medication I am on and smoking interferes with another and yet I do both, I really do not have the willpower to resist these things something. Maybe I am on too many medications, maybe that is the problem ( Read more... )

I had a really incredible good week in Colorado with Cole and his friends and Ditzy-Jessie and her cousin and his friends and lots of interesting people and lots of hookah-smoking and cafe-sitting. We drove back down to Tucson on Thursday,16 hours of boring scenery for the most part but a beautiful sunset over the mesas in southern New Mexico. ( Read more... )

I can't sleep.  There are strange noises in my room. There are all these click-click-clicking noises moving around my room, usually right near my head or from somewhere in my bed but also above me, below me, and across the room from me. Every time I turn on the light to investigate, the noises stop. It is really baffling. When I was here for ( Read more... )

Where the fuck is my wallet. Why the fuck are the people who might know something about the location of my wallet not answering their phones. What the fuck was I thinking scheduling a flight the morning after new year's eve. WHERE IS MY FUCKING WALLET