Smallville Fic - Baby Love (Sequel to Anticipation)
On MPREG day, I posted Anticipation. I thought that would be it. However, dolimir_k, who is slightly evil, along with enderwiggin24, who is also slightly evil, wanted a sequel. Here it is.
Title: Baby Love
Author: mahaliem
Fandom: Smallville
Pairing: Clex
Rating: Mature
Warnings: This is not quite as cheery and light as you might suspect from the title.
Summary: Zod was a slut. Lex is pregnant. Clark feels responsible. Lex manipulates Clark into wooing him. This is the result. (Sequel to Anticipation)
This has not been beta read.
Baby Love
Lex studied Clark. Clark was willing to woo him. Powerful, alien Clark was willing to do whatever Lex wanted him to.
The thought flitted through Lex's mind that if he played his cards right within six months he'd be ruling the world. It would be so easy.
Lex distrusted things that were easy.
Life was supposed to be a struggle. Additionally, if he used Clark's powers to control the world then it wouldn't be so much his achievement as Clark's.
Instead he would use this unique opportunity to humiliate Clark. Clark had lied and lied and lied to him. He'd ruined their friendship. The last straw was Clark treating him like he was brain-dead just because he was carrying an alien spawn thanks to Zod's slutty ways. Clark deserved this treatment.
Besides, it's not like he wouldn't rule the world eventually on his own.
"I've always wanted to be serenaded," Lex confessed to Clark.
The color disappeared from Clark's face and Lex felt a thrum of satisfaction.
"Y-you want me to sing?"
"That's usually what's involved in serenading."
Clark was rapidly shaking his head and backing away from Lex. "I d-don't sing. I can't sing."
"I'm sure you're just being modest," Lex said.
"I'm not," Clark protested. "I really can't sing."
Lex allowed his gaze to drop to the floor. "Oh,' he said quietly, feigning disappointment.
"I'll do something else," Clark said fervently. "Anything else."
Lex raised his eyes. "Anything?"
* * *
"We're going to die," Clark muttered as he and Lex walked into the Wild Coyote. "Even though you have mutant healing powers and I'm invulnerable, we're going to die."
"Don't be so negative," Lex reassured him. "This is the twenty-first century. I'm sure that social progress has come to even so backward a place as Smallville."
"Can't we do something else?" Clark pleaded. "One that doesn't involve us being killed?"
"You said you'd do anything besides serenade me," Lex reminded Clark. "I don't think taking me dancing is too much to ask when you're supposed to be wooing me."
"Yeah, but I thought we'd go someplace in Metropolis. A gay club or something. Not the Wild Coyote."
"You mean you wanted to go somewhere no one knew you." Lex's bottom lip trembled slightly. "Because you're ashamed of me."
Damn he was good at manipulation, Lex thought, as Clark looked guilty.
"I'm not."
"It's because I'm bald. And I'm pregnant, but people don't know I'm pregnant so they just think I'm fat. That's why you don't want to be seen with me."
"That's not it," Clark insisted.
"Then you will dance with me?"
Clark let out a long sigh. "Yes. Afterwards I'll probably die with you, but if it makes you happy...."
Lex smiled. "Thank you, Clark."
* * *
They'd been dancing for only five minutes when a man so large that he made Clark seem petite tapped Clark on the shoulder. The man was as broad as the proverbial side of a barn and his build was shown off by a sweaty t-shirt advertising Harley-Davidson. The sleeves had been ripped off exposing tattooed biceps the size of gallon milk jugs
"What do you think you're doing, boy?" the man growled at Clark.
Lex watched in fascination as the shy, bumbling, bashful man he'd been dancing with only a moment earlier became hard and unyielding as he squared off against the newcomer.
"I'm dancing. What's it to you?"
The stranger took a step closer, Clark's tougher demeanor doing nothing to dissuade him.
"Maybe I don't want to watch you dance with your friend," the man snarled. "It's disgusting."
Clark got right back in the man's face and Lex couldn't help but be impressed.
"Well, maybe I don't care what you think. Maybe my friend and I think it's a free world and we should be able to do what we want. We're not hurting anyone."
Clark was practically nose to... well, nose to neck with the man. Lex had thought that making Jonathan Kent's son get involved in a bar fight over dancing with a Lionel Luthor's son would be a certain type of justice. A sort of 'fuck you' to Clark's father and all of his prejudices. Now that it was about to happen, he was beginning to get nervous at the thought that soon there would be blood flying.
Lex quickly stepped out of range of any spurts of blood.
Now they could fight.
"It turns my stomach," the behemoth was shouting. "And I aim to put a stop to it."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah!"
Clark was watching the man carefully and Lex figured he was being noble and letting the guy throw the first punch. Of course, it wasn't that noble when one knew the man was likely to break all the bones in his hand.
"Rule number one," the man yelled at Clark. "You've got to listen to the music."
Lex blinked.
Clark blinked.
"If you don't listen to the music," the man continued, "there aint no way you're going to ever be able to dance to the rhythm."
Lex groaned and covered his face with a palm. It wasn't the fact that two males were together that had raised the man's ire. It was Clark's abysmal dancing.
* * *
Lex sipped his incredibly inferior bottle of water and scowled at the dance floor.
Clark was still dancing, his body gleaming with sweat (and why did a super-powered alien sweat anyway, Lex grumbled to himself) while his current partner guided his hips to the music.
Clark's partner was going for the cowboy look, completely with boots, large belt buckle, and hat. Being a backwater town like Smallville, it was completely possible that it wasn't just a look.
Throughout the night, Clark had been passed from partner to partner, males and females, who'd each done their best to teach him how to dance. Clark had listened carefully to their advice, tried to follow their instruction, and still danced like a monkey on crack.
Lex, needing no dance lessons himself, had been relegated to a table to the side with orders not to drink anything alcoholic. Like he'd even consider drinking the swill in this place. Then he'd sat back and watched Clark.
Clark had smiled and nodded and laughed good-naturedly at his inability with everyone, which had completely charmed them. Meanwhile, Lex was trying not to grind his teeth when hands trespassed on territory that belonged to him. Like the one that was currently more on Clark's ass than hip.
Velma, Elliot the behemoth's short, round girlfriend, patted Lex's arm and he stifled the urge to move out of her reach.
"Don't you mind Larry." She pointedly looked at the cowboy Clark was attempting to dance with. "He's just being friendly."
"If he's any friendlier, he's going to lose that hand," Lex threatened.
Velma laughed. She obviously had no idea who he was and how easily he could arrange for that to happen.
"Believe me, sweetie, you've got no reason to be jealous. That boy of yours has eyes only for you. I've seen the way he keeps glancing over here. And how many times has he stopped by to make sure you're okay - Four? Five? He wouldn't be out there at all if you hadn't told him it was okay."
Clark had asked Lex if it was all right with him and been told it was fine. But that was before Lex had been forced to watch men and women paw Clark, their hands touching him all over.
Fed up with the situation, Lex rose from the table and strode toward Clark. When he tapped Clark on the shoulder, Clark spun around and grinned excitedly at him.
"Lex, I think I'm finally getting it."
Larry, the cowboy, gave Lex a small smile and a shake of his head, negating Clark's statement.
"Let's go," Lex ordered.
Moving to leave, Lex was stopped by Elliot's Harley-Davidson-clad bulk.
"You boys can't leave without dancing again."
"I don't think-" Lex began but Elliot interrupted him.
"I know what your problem is and don't you worry none. I'll handle it."
Elliot began motioning to the disk jockey, then cupped his hand around his mouth to yell, "Hey, Jake. Play a slow one for these fellows."
Jake nodded and a slow song was soon playing.
"I think this is more your speed." Elliot smiled at Clark and Lex benevolently.
Lex was going to kill him.
"Lex?"
Clark was standing there, arms out, waiting. With a sigh of resignation, Lex moved close to him.
"Fine, but I lead."
"Okay," Clark agreed readily.
* * *
It was a dance, Lex reminded himself. Just a dance. Two bodies swaying together to the music.
It didn't matter that Clark's body next to him was firm and warm. It made no difference to any of his plans that he could feel Clark's breath against his ear. And he wasn't going to dwell at all on the hardness that was pressing against his belly.
Well... he wasn't going to dwell on it much.
Okay, he admitted to himself, he was thinking about it a lot. But he could think of other things to like... like...
"Damn," Lex swore under his breath.
"You okay?" Clark asked, separating a bit so that he could see Lex's face. "I didn't step on your feet, did I?"
"I'd like to go home after this," Lex said quietly.
Clark looked at him for a moment longer then nodded. "Sure."
For the rest of the dance, Clark kept his body separate from Lex. Without Clark's warmth, without Clark pressed against him, Lex felt very cold and alone.
Obviously pregnancy was causing his hormones to be seriously out of whack.
* * *
The next morning, Clark wandered into Lex's bathroom at the worst possible time. Lex would've been less embarrassed if Clark had caught him masturbating to a photo of Dick Cheney rather than leaning over the toilet being sick.
"I brought you some of those pastries you like from Metropolis," Clark said as Lex heaved a second time.
Lex wiped his face with a cloth. "I'm afraid now's not a good time."
"You're really sick, aren't you?" Clark asked, looking concerned. "There's nothing wrong with the baby, is there?"
"I've talked to Toby and he said it was perfectly normal. That all males who have been impregnated while possessed by evil aliens lose the contents of their stomach approximately every twenty-four hours."
"Oh," said Clark. "I guess that's okay, then."
Lex didn't have the energy to roll his eyes. He hated it when his sarcasm was wasted on the stupid.
Clark placed the bag he'd been carrying on the counter and picked up a fresh washcloth. He wetted it with cool water, wrung it out, and then placed it on the back of Lex's neck. His hands trailed down Lex's back and began to rub soothingly.
Lex decided he could forgive Clark this one time for being stupid.
* * *
Two days later Lex was dressed and waiting for Clark to take him to his favorite restaurant in his continued effort to woo him. He planned to order the most expensive item on the menu and watch Clark squirm. Clark foiled his plan by showing up carrying a picnic basket.
"What's that?" Lex asked, staring at the basket.
"Our lunch," Clark said. "I thought we could go on a picnic instead."
Lex turned his stare onto Clark. Pretty made up for a lot of things, but this wasn't one of them.
"A picnic as in outside? As in sitting on the ground and eating?"
"That's what's usually involved in a picnic," Clark explained patiently
"There's dirt outside. You want me to sit on dirt."
"Actually I have a blanket that you can sit on."
"The sun is shining outside," Lex pointed out. "I'll get sunburned."
"I have lotion. If that's not good enough we can set up under a tree." There was an edge to Clark's words as his patience wore thin.
"There are bugs outside. Ants. Gnats. Bees. Worms."
"Worms aren't bugs."
Lex scowled. "That still doesn't mean I want to eat my lunch with them."
"Were you this bitchy before you got knocked up?" Clark snapped.
Lex was about to complain some more, but quickly decided not to.
"Fine," he said, once he'd reined in his temper. "We'll have a picnic if that's what makes you happy."
"It's not about what makes me happy, Lex," Clark replied. "It's about what makes you happy. And I think you'll like this. My mom made all your favorite things."
Lex harrumphed. He refused to be happy, even if it killed him.
* * *
Lex's bad mood was attacked by Martha Kent's fried chicken. It began to falter when assailed by her homemade potato salad. By the time they ate the apple pie she'd baked, the bad mood had been completely obliterated.
Life really wasn't fair.
As he lay in the grass and stared up at the branches of the tree above him he decided that maybe picnics weren't so bad after all.
Clark plopped down on the grass next to him.
"What are you thinking about?" Clark asked.
Lex frowned. He hadn't been thinking about much, which was unusual. He'd been enjoying the weather and relaxing.
"I'm planning how to take over a competitor's business. I'd explain it to you, but it's quite complicated," Lex lied.
Clark looked disappointed. "I was hoping you were thinking about us."
"Us? Why would I be thinking about us?"
"You do remember the whole 'I'm wooing you so that you'll marry me' thing, right?"
"Of course."
Clark propped himself on an elbow and leaned closer to Lex. "When we get married, the pastor will tell me to kiss the bride."
"No, he'll tell me to kiss the bride. That's you. You're the girl."
"You're the one who's pregnant."
Clark did have a point. Damn it.
Lex decided to drop the bride argument. "And you're telling me about this because...."
"Because we've never kissed," Clark stated.
"We have too."
"No. We haven't."
"On the riverbank the day we met," Lex said. "You kissed me."
"I performed CPR."
"I felt tongue."
Clark reared back. "You so did not!"
"I did. I was dying and a fifteen-year old pervert molested me."
"In your dreams," Clark said, scathingly.
Lex paused to consider. There had been several dreams like that. Clark had made another point. Damn it.
"Be that as it may, I still don't understand why you brought up the matter," Lex told Clark.
"Because I wanted to kiss you."
"You wanted to? Does that mean you don't want to now?"
"I'm not in the mood anymore."
A moment passed before Lex spoke again.
"Clark?"
"What?"
"Will you kiss me?"
Clark moved nearer again then halted and pulled back. Lex was a little shocked at how disappointed he felt.
"I'm waiting," Lex said.
"It feels weird."
"Come on, pucker up. Plant one on me."
Clark glared at Lex, and then straightened up again.
"Now I'm definitely not in the mood."
Another moment passed.
"Clark?"
Clark let out a sigh of resignation and turned back towards where Lex lay. "What?"
"I really want you to kiss me," Lex said huskily. "I want to feel your warm breath caressing my skin before your lips meet mine. I want to taste you. Lick you. Nibble your lips. Let your tongue invade my mouth, thrusting inside. I want to be devoured by you. Kissed to the point that the world melts away around us and all that exists is your mouth on mine."
Clark's eyes widened. "Fuck," he breathed.
"Later," Lex murmured. "For now, just a kiss."
After that build-up, Lex expected the kiss to be disappointing. It wasn't. All he knew was that when their mouths separated several minutes had passed and somehow his right leg had wound around Clark's waist.
"Fuck," Lex breathed.
Clark grinned. "Later."
* * *
The pain started around bedtime and the thought flitted through his head that perhaps Martha knew what was going on between her baby boy and Lex and had purposely poisoned the picnic food.
She'd get away with it, too. No one would suspect that she'd risk poisoning her own son to get at Lex. Only she and Clark would realize that Clark had never been in any danger because he was an alien.
The pain came a second time and Lex threw out that scenario. It wasn't his stomach that was hurting, but below.
During the third onslaught of pain Lex staggered to his phone, forcing himself to move despite the agony shooting through him. With fumbling fingers he dialed a familiar number. From what seemed like a great distance he heard it ring twice.
By the time it was answered Lex had lost consciousness.
* * *
Lex woke up in a bed at Smallville General Hospital. It had happened so many times before that he recognized the room.
"Lex?"
Turning his head, he saw Clark sitting next to him.
"Why...." he managed to say weakly.
"I-I'm s-sorry, Lex," Clark said, stumbling over the words. "The baby... you lost the baby."
Lex knew that he'd plan to get rid of it. He'd been researching ways for the past few months. He'd never wanted it in the first place.
But... but... the news that he'd lost it made him feel hollowed out and empty. He understood what it all meant, but his mind couldn't come to grips with it. He felt disconnected from everyone and everything in the world.
Two warm hands settled around one of his and squeezed gently.
"Are you okay?"
Lex pushed the loss down deep inside of him. No matter how hurt, a Luthor was never weak, never emotional.
"This proves my theory that males aren't meant to bear children," he said. Despite his best effort, he couldn't force more than a tightening of the lips as a smile.
Clark pulled back and stared at him. "I thought that you cared."
"I do, but I'm sure I'll bear other children in the years to come. No. Wait. Maybe not."
"Lex-" Clark began before being interrupted.
"Don't tell me you're actually sorry I lost the brat. After all, it lets you off the hook."
Clark stood up, sending the chair he'd been sitting in screeching back.
"What are you talking about?"
Lex let out a put-upon sigh. "You felt responsible for me being knocked up. It was the only reason you were wooing me. Now you don't have to pretend to care about me." Lex's tone hardened. "And I don't have to pretend to care about you, either."
The hurt in Clark's face was so evident, so plain to see, that Lex felt a moment of misgiving. He opened his mouth thinking that maybe he could take it back, but it was too late.
With a whoosh, Clark raced off.
* * *
Lex scanned the headlines of various newspapers. They'd all reported that he was in the hospital, though most had cited unknown causes. A few had listed possible reasons as intestinal blockage, tumors, and cancerous growths. The only paper that had come close to getting it right was the Weekly World News.
Bald Billionaire Has Alien Baby
Underneath was a manipulated photo showing him holding an alien similar to those in Independence Day.
Lex scanned the article then carefully folded up the paper. This one he would save, even if the alien baby looked nothing like the small lump that had been confiscated from the hospital by his security personnel.
Rising from his desk, he picked up the object he'd requested earlier from his staff and strode outside. Within minutes he was under the tree where he and Clark had picnicked.
It would've been smarter to incinerate all evidence that he'd ever been pregnant. Secretly purchasing a small coffin and burying the baby had been beyond foolish.
Lex laid down the white lily he'd carried from the mansion on the small, unmarked mound, glad that no one was around for miles to witness his grief.
He'd completely forgotten about Clark's superb eyesight.
* * *
Lex woke to the sound of cats yowling outside his window. It took a minute for him to realize that there were no cats involved.
Wincing at the noise, he made his way to his window and opened it. Leaning out he saw Clark standing on his front lawn.
"What the hell are you doing?" he yelled.
Clark stopped making the horrendous noise and smiled up at Lex. "Wooing you."
"Wooing me? That was you wooing me?"
"You said you wanted to be serenaded."
"Serenaded, yes. Death by exploding ear drums, no. Usually my spouses wait until after we're married to kill me. What song was that supposed to be anyway?"
Clark grinned. "If you don't know, I guess that means I'll have to sing it again."
"No!" Lex shouted, but it was too late.
"But all you do is treat me bad," Clark warbled. "Break my heart and leave me sad."
"Aargh!" Lex covered his ears. "Whatever you want - money, power, all the pie you could ever eat - I'll give it to you if you quit singing."
"Does that mean you'll marry me?" Clark asked.
"Yes! Yes! Just as long as you stop."
Clark made a giant leap and grabbed onto the edge of the window sill. In a split second he'd climbed inside. "If we're getting married," Clark said, "then I think you should kiss me some more."
Lex kissed Clark thoroughly and deeply.
He figured if Clark's mouth was busy, then he couldn't sing.
In an unspoken agreement, they both started drifting toward the bed.
Clark broke away, breathing heavily. "The last time an alien was in you, you got pregnant."
"That was different. I was possessed," Lex murmured, then let out a low moan.
Clark paused in laying kisses along Lex's throat. "We should use a condom. Just in case."
"Fine, but what are the odds of male becoming pregnant? Twice?"
Lex had to remind himself of those odds again and again after the condom broke.
The End
Title: Baby Love
Author: mahaliem
Fandom: Smallville
Pairing: Clex
Rating: Mature
Warnings: This is not quite as cheery and light as you might suspect from the title.
Summary: Zod was a slut. Lex is pregnant. Clark feels responsible. Lex manipulates Clark into wooing him. This is the result. (Sequel to Anticipation)
This has not been beta read.
Baby Love
Lex studied Clark. Clark was willing to woo him. Powerful, alien Clark was willing to do whatever Lex wanted him to.
The thought flitted through Lex's mind that if he played his cards right within six months he'd be ruling the world. It would be so easy.
Lex distrusted things that were easy.
Life was supposed to be a struggle. Additionally, if he used Clark's powers to control the world then it wouldn't be so much his achievement as Clark's.
Instead he would use this unique opportunity to humiliate Clark. Clark had lied and lied and lied to him. He'd ruined their friendship. The last straw was Clark treating him like he was brain-dead just because he was carrying an alien spawn thanks to Zod's slutty ways. Clark deserved this treatment.
Besides, it's not like he wouldn't rule the world eventually on his own.
"I've always wanted to be serenaded," Lex confessed to Clark.
The color disappeared from Clark's face and Lex felt a thrum of satisfaction.
"Y-you want me to sing?"
"That's usually what's involved in serenading."
Clark was rapidly shaking his head and backing away from Lex. "I d-don't sing. I can't sing."
"I'm sure you're just being modest," Lex said.
"I'm not," Clark protested. "I really can't sing."
Lex allowed his gaze to drop to the floor. "Oh,' he said quietly, feigning disappointment.
"I'll do something else," Clark said fervently. "Anything else."
Lex raised his eyes. "Anything?"
* * *
"We're going to die," Clark muttered as he and Lex walked into the Wild Coyote. "Even though you have mutant healing powers and I'm invulnerable, we're going to die."
"Don't be so negative," Lex reassured him. "This is the twenty-first century. I'm sure that social progress has come to even so backward a place as Smallville."
"Can't we do something else?" Clark pleaded. "One that doesn't involve us being killed?"
"You said you'd do anything besides serenade me," Lex reminded Clark. "I don't think taking me dancing is too much to ask when you're supposed to be wooing me."
"Yeah, but I thought we'd go someplace in Metropolis. A gay club or something. Not the Wild Coyote."
"You mean you wanted to go somewhere no one knew you." Lex's bottom lip trembled slightly. "Because you're ashamed of me."
Damn he was good at manipulation, Lex thought, as Clark looked guilty.
"I'm not."
"It's because I'm bald. And I'm pregnant, but people don't know I'm pregnant so they just think I'm fat. That's why you don't want to be seen with me."
"That's not it," Clark insisted.
"Then you will dance with me?"
Clark let out a long sigh. "Yes. Afterwards I'll probably die with you, but if it makes you happy...."
Lex smiled. "Thank you, Clark."
* * *
They'd been dancing for only five minutes when a man so large that he made Clark seem petite tapped Clark on the shoulder. The man was as broad as the proverbial side of a barn and his build was shown off by a sweaty t-shirt advertising Harley-Davidson. The sleeves had been ripped off exposing tattooed biceps the size of gallon milk jugs
"What do you think you're doing, boy?" the man growled at Clark.
Lex watched in fascination as the shy, bumbling, bashful man he'd been dancing with only a moment earlier became hard and unyielding as he squared off against the newcomer.
"I'm dancing. What's it to you?"
The stranger took a step closer, Clark's tougher demeanor doing nothing to dissuade him.
"Maybe I don't want to watch you dance with your friend," the man snarled. "It's disgusting."
Clark got right back in the man's face and Lex couldn't help but be impressed.
"Well, maybe I don't care what you think. Maybe my friend and I think it's a free world and we should be able to do what we want. We're not hurting anyone."
Clark was practically nose to... well, nose to neck with the man. Lex had thought that making Jonathan Kent's son get involved in a bar fight over dancing with a Lionel Luthor's son would be a certain type of justice. A sort of 'fuck you' to Clark's father and all of his prejudices. Now that it was about to happen, he was beginning to get nervous at the thought that soon there would be blood flying.
Lex quickly stepped out of range of any spurts of blood.
Now they could fight.
"It turns my stomach," the behemoth was shouting. "And I aim to put a stop to it."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah!"
Clark was watching the man carefully and Lex figured he was being noble and letting the guy throw the first punch. Of course, it wasn't that noble when one knew the man was likely to break all the bones in his hand.
"Rule number one," the man yelled at Clark. "You've got to listen to the music."
Lex blinked.
Clark blinked.
"If you don't listen to the music," the man continued, "there aint no way you're going to ever be able to dance to the rhythm."
Lex groaned and covered his face with a palm. It wasn't the fact that two males were together that had raised the man's ire. It was Clark's abysmal dancing.
* * *
Lex sipped his incredibly inferior bottle of water and scowled at the dance floor.
Clark was still dancing, his body gleaming with sweat (and why did a super-powered alien sweat anyway, Lex grumbled to himself) while his current partner guided his hips to the music.
Clark's partner was going for the cowboy look, completely with boots, large belt buckle, and hat. Being a backwater town like Smallville, it was completely possible that it wasn't just a look.
Throughout the night, Clark had been passed from partner to partner, males and females, who'd each done their best to teach him how to dance. Clark had listened carefully to their advice, tried to follow their instruction, and still danced like a monkey on crack.
Lex, needing no dance lessons himself, had been relegated to a table to the side with orders not to drink anything alcoholic. Like he'd even consider drinking the swill in this place. Then he'd sat back and watched Clark.
Clark had smiled and nodded and laughed good-naturedly at his inability with everyone, which had completely charmed them. Meanwhile, Lex was trying not to grind his teeth when hands trespassed on territory that belonged to him. Like the one that was currently more on Clark's ass than hip.
Velma, Elliot the behemoth's short, round girlfriend, patted Lex's arm and he stifled the urge to move out of her reach.
"Don't you mind Larry." She pointedly looked at the cowboy Clark was attempting to dance with. "He's just being friendly."
"If he's any friendlier, he's going to lose that hand," Lex threatened.
Velma laughed. She obviously had no idea who he was and how easily he could arrange for that to happen.
"Believe me, sweetie, you've got no reason to be jealous. That boy of yours has eyes only for you. I've seen the way he keeps glancing over here. And how many times has he stopped by to make sure you're okay - Four? Five? He wouldn't be out there at all if you hadn't told him it was okay."
Clark had asked Lex if it was all right with him and been told it was fine. But that was before Lex had been forced to watch men and women paw Clark, their hands touching him all over.
Fed up with the situation, Lex rose from the table and strode toward Clark. When he tapped Clark on the shoulder, Clark spun around and grinned excitedly at him.
"Lex, I think I'm finally getting it."
Larry, the cowboy, gave Lex a small smile and a shake of his head, negating Clark's statement.
"Let's go," Lex ordered.
Moving to leave, Lex was stopped by Elliot's Harley-Davidson-clad bulk.
"You boys can't leave without dancing again."
"I don't think-" Lex began but Elliot interrupted him.
"I know what your problem is and don't you worry none. I'll handle it."
Elliot began motioning to the disk jockey, then cupped his hand around his mouth to yell, "Hey, Jake. Play a slow one for these fellows."
Jake nodded and a slow song was soon playing.
"I think this is more your speed." Elliot smiled at Clark and Lex benevolently.
Lex was going to kill him.
"Lex?"
Clark was standing there, arms out, waiting. With a sigh of resignation, Lex moved close to him.
"Fine, but I lead."
"Okay," Clark agreed readily.
* * *
It was a dance, Lex reminded himself. Just a dance. Two bodies swaying together to the music.
It didn't matter that Clark's body next to him was firm and warm. It made no difference to any of his plans that he could feel Clark's breath against his ear. And he wasn't going to dwell at all on the hardness that was pressing against his belly.
Well... he wasn't going to dwell on it much.
Okay, he admitted to himself, he was thinking about it a lot. But he could think of other things to like... like...
"Damn," Lex swore under his breath.
"You okay?" Clark asked, separating a bit so that he could see Lex's face. "I didn't step on your feet, did I?"
"I'd like to go home after this," Lex said quietly.
Clark looked at him for a moment longer then nodded. "Sure."
For the rest of the dance, Clark kept his body separate from Lex. Without Clark's warmth, without Clark pressed against him, Lex felt very cold and alone.
Obviously pregnancy was causing his hormones to be seriously out of whack.
* * *
The next morning, Clark wandered into Lex's bathroom at the worst possible time. Lex would've been less embarrassed if Clark had caught him masturbating to a photo of Dick Cheney rather than leaning over the toilet being sick.
"I brought you some of those pastries you like from Metropolis," Clark said as Lex heaved a second time.
Lex wiped his face with a cloth. "I'm afraid now's not a good time."
"You're really sick, aren't you?" Clark asked, looking concerned. "There's nothing wrong with the baby, is there?"
"I've talked to Toby and he said it was perfectly normal. That all males who have been impregnated while possessed by evil aliens lose the contents of their stomach approximately every twenty-four hours."
"Oh," said Clark. "I guess that's okay, then."
Lex didn't have the energy to roll his eyes. He hated it when his sarcasm was wasted on the stupid.
Clark placed the bag he'd been carrying on the counter and picked up a fresh washcloth. He wetted it with cool water, wrung it out, and then placed it on the back of Lex's neck. His hands trailed down Lex's back and began to rub soothingly.
Lex decided he could forgive Clark this one time for being stupid.
* * *
Two days later Lex was dressed and waiting for Clark to take him to his favorite restaurant in his continued effort to woo him. He planned to order the most expensive item on the menu and watch Clark squirm. Clark foiled his plan by showing up carrying a picnic basket.
"What's that?" Lex asked, staring at the basket.
"Our lunch," Clark said. "I thought we could go on a picnic instead."
Lex turned his stare onto Clark. Pretty made up for a lot of things, but this wasn't one of them.
"A picnic as in outside? As in sitting on the ground and eating?"
"That's what's usually involved in a picnic," Clark explained patiently
"There's dirt outside. You want me to sit on dirt."
"Actually I have a blanket that you can sit on."
"The sun is shining outside," Lex pointed out. "I'll get sunburned."
"I have lotion. If that's not good enough we can set up under a tree." There was an edge to Clark's words as his patience wore thin.
"There are bugs outside. Ants. Gnats. Bees. Worms."
"Worms aren't bugs."
Lex scowled. "That still doesn't mean I want to eat my lunch with them."
"Were you this bitchy before you got knocked up?" Clark snapped.
Lex was about to complain some more, but quickly decided not to.
"Fine," he said, once he'd reined in his temper. "We'll have a picnic if that's what makes you happy."
"It's not about what makes me happy, Lex," Clark replied. "It's about what makes you happy. And I think you'll like this. My mom made all your favorite things."
Lex harrumphed. He refused to be happy, even if it killed him.
* * *
Lex's bad mood was attacked by Martha Kent's fried chicken. It began to falter when assailed by her homemade potato salad. By the time they ate the apple pie she'd baked, the bad mood had been completely obliterated.
Life really wasn't fair.
As he lay in the grass and stared up at the branches of the tree above him he decided that maybe picnics weren't so bad after all.
Clark plopped down on the grass next to him.
"What are you thinking about?" Clark asked.
Lex frowned. He hadn't been thinking about much, which was unusual. He'd been enjoying the weather and relaxing.
"I'm planning how to take over a competitor's business. I'd explain it to you, but it's quite complicated," Lex lied.
Clark looked disappointed. "I was hoping you were thinking about us."
"Us? Why would I be thinking about us?"
"You do remember the whole 'I'm wooing you so that you'll marry me' thing, right?"
"Of course."
Clark propped himself on an elbow and leaned closer to Lex. "When we get married, the pastor will tell me to kiss the bride."
"No, he'll tell me to kiss the bride. That's you. You're the girl."
"You're the one who's pregnant."
Clark did have a point. Damn it.
Lex decided to drop the bride argument. "And you're telling me about this because...."
"Because we've never kissed," Clark stated.
"We have too."
"No. We haven't."
"On the riverbank the day we met," Lex said. "You kissed me."
"I performed CPR."
"I felt tongue."
Clark reared back. "You so did not!"
"I did. I was dying and a fifteen-year old pervert molested me."
"In your dreams," Clark said, scathingly.
Lex paused to consider. There had been several dreams like that. Clark had made another point. Damn it.
"Be that as it may, I still don't understand why you brought up the matter," Lex told Clark.
"Because I wanted to kiss you."
"You wanted to? Does that mean you don't want to now?"
"I'm not in the mood anymore."
A moment passed before Lex spoke again.
"Clark?"
"What?"
"Will you kiss me?"
Clark moved nearer again then halted and pulled back. Lex was a little shocked at how disappointed he felt.
"I'm waiting," Lex said.
"It feels weird."
"Come on, pucker up. Plant one on me."
Clark glared at Lex, and then straightened up again.
"Now I'm definitely not in the mood."
Another moment passed.
"Clark?"
Clark let out a sigh of resignation and turned back towards where Lex lay. "What?"
"I really want you to kiss me," Lex said huskily. "I want to feel your warm breath caressing my skin before your lips meet mine. I want to taste you. Lick you. Nibble your lips. Let your tongue invade my mouth, thrusting inside. I want to be devoured by you. Kissed to the point that the world melts away around us and all that exists is your mouth on mine."
Clark's eyes widened. "Fuck," he breathed.
"Later," Lex murmured. "For now, just a kiss."
After that build-up, Lex expected the kiss to be disappointing. It wasn't. All he knew was that when their mouths separated several minutes had passed and somehow his right leg had wound around Clark's waist.
"Fuck," Lex breathed.
Clark grinned. "Later."
* * *
The pain started around bedtime and the thought flitted through his head that perhaps Martha knew what was going on between her baby boy and Lex and had purposely poisoned the picnic food.
She'd get away with it, too. No one would suspect that she'd risk poisoning her own son to get at Lex. Only she and Clark would realize that Clark had never been in any danger because he was an alien.
The pain came a second time and Lex threw out that scenario. It wasn't his stomach that was hurting, but below.
During the third onslaught of pain Lex staggered to his phone, forcing himself to move despite the agony shooting through him. With fumbling fingers he dialed a familiar number. From what seemed like a great distance he heard it ring twice.
By the time it was answered Lex had lost consciousness.
* * *
Lex woke up in a bed at Smallville General Hospital. It had happened so many times before that he recognized the room.
"Lex?"
Turning his head, he saw Clark sitting next to him.
"Why...." he managed to say weakly.
"I-I'm s-sorry, Lex," Clark said, stumbling over the words. "The baby... you lost the baby."
Lex knew that he'd plan to get rid of it. He'd been researching ways for the past few months. He'd never wanted it in the first place.
But... but... the news that he'd lost it made him feel hollowed out and empty. He understood what it all meant, but his mind couldn't come to grips with it. He felt disconnected from everyone and everything in the world.
Two warm hands settled around one of his and squeezed gently.
"Are you okay?"
Lex pushed the loss down deep inside of him. No matter how hurt, a Luthor was never weak, never emotional.
"This proves my theory that males aren't meant to bear children," he said. Despite his best effort, he couldn't force more than a tightening of the lips as a smile.
Clark pulled back and stared at him. "I thought that you cared."
"I do, but I'm sure I'll bear other children in the years to come. No. Wait. Maybe not."
"Lex-" Clark began before being interrupted.
"Don't tell me you're actually sorry I lost the brat. After all, it lets you off the hook."
Clark stood up, sending the chair he'd been sitting in screeching back.
"What are you talking about?"
Lex let out a put-upon sigh. "You felt responsible for me being knocked up. It was the only reason you were wooing me. Now you don't have to pretend to care about me." Lex's tone hardened. "And I don't have to pretend to care about you, either."
The hurt in Clark's face was so evident, so plain to see, that Lex felt a moment of misgiving. He opened his mouth thinking that maybe he could take it back, but it was too late.
With a whoosh, Clark raced off.
* * *
Lex scanned the headlines of various newspapers. They'd all reported that he was in the hospital, though most had cited unknown causes. A few had listed possible reasons as intestinal blockage, tumors, and cancerous growths. The only paper that had come close to getting it right was the Weekly World News.
Bald Billionaire Has Alien Baby
Underneath was a manipulated photo showing him holding an alien similar to those in Independence Day.
Lex scanned the article then carefully folded up the paper. This one he would save, even if the alien baby looked nothing like the small lump that had been confiscated from the hospital by his security personnel.
Rising from his desk, he picked up the object he'd requested earlier from his staff and strode outside. Within minutes he was under the tree where he and Clark had picnicked.
It would've been smarter to incinerate all evidence that he'd ever been pregnant. Secretly purchasing a small coffin and burying the baby had been beyond foolish.
Lex laid down the white lily he'd carried from the mansion on the small, unmarked mound, glad that no one was around for miles to witness his grief.
He'd completely forgotten about Clark's superb eyesight.
* * *
Lex woke to the sound of cats yowling outside his window. It took a minute for him to realize that there were no cats involved.
Wincing at the noise, he made his way to his window and opened it. Leaning out he saw Clark standing on his front lawn.
"What the hell are you doing?" he yelled.
Clark stopped making the horrendous noise and smiled up at Lex. "Wooing you."
"Wooing me? That was you wooing me?"
"You said you wanted to be serenaded."
"Serenaded, yes. Death by exploding ear drums, no. Usually my spouses wait until after we're married to kill me. What song was that supposed to be anyway?"
Clark grinned. "If you don't know, I guess that means I'll have to sing it again."
"No!" Lex shouted, but it was too late.
"But all you do is treat me bad," Clark warbled. "Break my heart and leave me sad."
"Aargh!" Lex covered his ears. "Whatever you want - money, power, all the pie you could ever eat - I'll give it to you if you quit singing."
"Does that mean you'll marry me?" Clark asked.
"Yes! Yes! Just as long as you stop."
Clark made a giant leap and grabbed onto the edge of the window sill. In a split second he'd climbed inside. "If we're getting married," Clark said, "then I think you should kiss me some more."
Lex kissed Clark thoroughly and deeply.
He figured if Clark's mouth was busy, then he couldn't sing.
In an unspoken agreement, they both started drifting toward the bed.
Clark broke away, breathing heavily. "The last time an alien was in you, you got pregnant."
"That was different. I was possessed," Lex murmured, then let out a low moan.
Clark paused in laying kisses along Lex's throat. "We should use a condom. Just in case."
"Fine, but what are the odds of male becoming pregnant? Twice?"
Lex had to remind himself of those odds again and again after the condom broke.
The End