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Ok so i started umass and i am loving. I can't wait for all my hcc friends to get up there bc it will make it more fun. i am finally getting back to being myself and loving it. back to the old school matt that everyone has missed . -
another shit night
well i got through the last weekend of underage drinking after wesenday i will be legal. wow what a surprize instead of just leave everything alone and just relaxing at andy's no i have to try to make everyeone happy. relizing chris was pissed at me i drove from east long to his house and then saw someones car. then did stop went to andy's housegot ( Read more... ) -
idk anymore
I don't know what is going to happen right now do i fight or do i die is the stand i might have to take. i have so much to fight for but dieing is so much eaiser. and idk. i guess one day we all just will have to die -
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.....i can't wrtie alot but there is only one thing that could make it worse and i just reliezed what it was and if that happens. I will like flip out no more birthday no being happy if that happens i will be a wreck and destory me and idk what i will do -
lost
So i turned my phone on and saw the text from last night that i felt so bad. I am not happy with what i did at all thats why i left. I walked the whole way to my car. Freezing thinking deserving it each and every step. I hurt her so bad and deep without thinking. i was drunk he texted i called him and then downhill. i dont' even know what i was ( Read more... ) -
lost more
so all i wanted to do is chill with friends and have a fun weekend. does that ever fucking happen anymore nope. For some fucking reason where the fuck i go i cause drama. Last night i hurt someone so bad. She is never going to talk to me again and idk how i am going to deal with that. I didn't mean to do it. It just happened. I think i am just ( Read more... ) -
damn
I haven't worte in this thing in like fucking forever and i know no who i talk to will even read this. So..... life just suck an every and any way it could. When ever i try so hard to fix one thing it feels like 2 more break. my "friends" I don't know who is and who isn't. Lately it seems as if the people who i fucked up the most are still here for ( Read more... ) -
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holy shit i forgot all about this. I really haven't change much. everything is stil the same. I don' know why i try when i know that i have no chance yet i have alittle bit of hope. My friends always support that idea yet now i am really sure that i was right but idk. I don't think someone to beautiful smart and cool would ever even want to give me ( Read more... ) -
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wow damn it's been a long time. since i wrote in here in a while. thing haven't changed. Idk i like college making more friends other then that nothing much going on. hopefully things will change -
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well i am now 19 between this weekend and last i know i have great friends and great co-workers. Goeff throwing me a party. then today when i went into work tiff ann becky and jon had gotten me a cake a gift card and ballons. also i name tag that said birthday boy which i wore on me apron.and they bet me i wouldnt walk aaround with the ballon on my ( Read more... )