he forgives me. what is this universe doing to me? i can go back home tonight, put my pictures back up and my clothes in the drawer. need to stop thinking so much, and need to stop drinking so much and freaking out. it's always me freaking out, i mean, i don't know who i was last night. and i cried in my mothers lap for the first time in years ( Read more... )

what happened? what have i done? why do i do this to myself, to him? he won't take me back this time, his house is empty of my clothes, my pictures. i can't make this right. i wanted to drive my car into another this morning.

On and off I've been feeling pretty depressed or maybe lonely, can't tell the difference. I have Ted but it's not the same, I don't have friends like I used to. I have friends, people I hang out with at the bar, sometimes, very rarely we have a party or something, I have a bar to go where I always know someone even if it's just the bartender, but ( Read more... )

My nephew George died this morning. He is the son of my mom's first kid, Debbie, who is about 20 years older then me (Debbie, not the nephew)...I met George and my other nephew Michael once when my sister, mom and I went to Debbie's wedding 10 years ago, my mom actually officiated the wedding. Anyway, he is about 21 or 22, or was, I don't even ( Read more... )

Yup, that's right. it's been pouring for hours, it's finally let up a bit, but where i work now is flooded, our parking lot flooded, the lake across the street was part of the street, kinda just pouring out. Now i'm 5'9", and i waded out to my car until the water was hitting past my knees and then i started to freak out because there are ( Read more... )

I appreciate the happy birthdays, I didn't post that as a pity party for megan if that's what it sounded like..just surprised that my dad called when he usually calls me a day or weeks later, and get this, he even sent me a note with 10 bucks folded inside, the note said "It's not much but it's better then i've done in years. It will buy a couple ( Read more... )

Welp my birthday was yesterday, and the only family memeber that called me was...My dad. twice. Some of my friends called the day before and the day of...my brother sent me an e-mail yesterday that said he would call, but he didn't and i didn't get the e-mail until today anyway. My mom doesn't count cause i live with her, so i see her everyday, ( Read more... )

1. What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before? Um, i dunno ( Read more... )

So I got to ted's yesterday at about 7:30pm and he's got his front door open with the screen door closed and i look through the door and he's in there cooking...so i come in and he's like "babe get in here and help me out" and he's cooking one of the recipes that came in my Kraft food magazine that i had left there, i can't remember what the called ( Read more... )

ted called me this past sunday afternoon, we shot the shit for a minute and then he asked me if i wanted to watch family guy, and i said "together?" and he said yeah, so he said he would call me when he was near his house since he was at his parents at that time, so i went out and drank a little, whatever...and then he called i went over there and ( Read more... )