-
part 3
do we agree now, that wasn't a life. that wasn't even a lame excuse for one - it was just an excuse for failing, an excuse to fall back on whenever i didn't reach my own expectations. i don't need to be fragile or dependent - i can be myself. i don't need to be scared of life passing me by, i can just fill my life with happiness and record it all ( Read more... ) -
part 2
MON: IN, CSL, etc but strictly NO CRAP
TUE: 1200/1300 - fill up on low c foods (b’fast: ¼ cup oatmeal, 100mL yoghurt, 1 cup berries; snack: apple; lunch: tin of tuna, salad, crispbread; snack: cup of tea + 100g cottage cheese +carrot)
WED: IN, CSL, etc - no crap
THURS: IN, CSL, etc - no crap
FRI: 1400/1500 + sml treat (bfast: 1/3 cup muesli+ ( Read more... ) -
the end? pt 1
…the past…
“sometimes you’ve gotta accept that you can’t just SIT THERE and WAIT for things to happen. you’ve got to GET OUT THERE and MAKE THEM HAPPEN.”
i want to be… assertive, committed, confident, brave, carefree, courageous, fierce, determined, happy, joyful, purpose-ful, stylish, unique, friendly, dynamic, enthusiastic, healthy, ( Read more... ) -
Cross country season!!!
I am excited. I feel like I'm finally figuring stuff out for myself. I ... don't know. I'm not quite over things, sometimes it's still a struggle but WHATEVER, I'm training hard and all the running makes melon_cauli a very happy female : )!
Training today:
AIM: I wanted to do the first 1km in 4min 20 sec (lap split - 2min 10sec), the second 1km in 4 ( Read more... ) -
Neopets and fanfiction...
I don't know how, but i think that heopets and fanfiction just saved my life ( Read more... ) -
My new thing
Okay, so gradually increasing calories failed when the world conspired against me and handed me a whole heap of crap to eat, the calorie count of which I had to estimate, the consequence being that I was scared out of my brain with worry, the solution to which was that I began restricting again. It's a pity cause I was doing so well and everything ( Read more... ) -
All the catchy melodies are winding around the same progression...
I feel kinda ... teetering. On the very edge of a relapse ... but then again, so not. I don't know. I'm stronger than I was, or maybe it's because people are noticing stuff now.
I guess that, in itself, is kinda fucked up ... but what can I do?
She knows, now. I can't say it wasn't satisfying.
L picked me up and whizzed me around (and I was like "AAAH ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
FAT ( Read more... ) -
I AM BAAAAACK!
I fucking did what I was supposed to do!!! :D :D :D :D!!!! I'm soooo happy - I came 2nd by like 3cm but that's ok because I was so freaked out BUT I DID IT ( Read more... )