I had just gotten my wisdom teeth out and was recovering in the dentist's office. Still feeling the effects of the sedatives, I could not keep quiet. I asked the dentist's assistant what kind of music he listened to, and he replied, "mostly underground techno". Finally the dentist told me to shut up.

It was a warm summer day and Jordan Henderson and I were out on my front lawn playing in the sprinkler. For some reason that I don't entirely remember, I was dressed only in my underwear. As the festivities were winding down, a group of teenagers drove by, shouted "hey kid, put some clothes on", and sped off.

Rama and I were spending the night at Jason's house. We had just come back from watching the Sixth Sense and our nerves were a bit shot. When it came time to go to bed, we were all too terrified to go downstairs to fetch blankets. Then Jason told us about a dream he had in which he opened a door underneath his stairs and inside there were a ( Read more... )

One day, while hanging out at Jason Kim's house, Jefferson Kim took us aside and explained the inner workings of defragmentation using legos as visual aids.

One day at church, Mitchell informed me that, according to his mom, nudity was "a bunch of naked people standing around". We approached Peter, eager to divulge this information. Unfortunately, my dad was listening in and he scolded us before we could spread this newfound knowledge.

My friends (Rory and Andrew?) and I were playing in the McDonalds play place. Upon entering the first of a series of tubes, Rory informed me that if I touched the tiny bolts lining the tube wall, I would be shocked. He then pointed to a square capsule directly after the tube, and told me that if I didn't keep my hands in the air as I passed ( Read more... )

One day during recess, I did something to greatly upset one of my classmates. She (I think her name was Catherine) ran to the recess duty, complaining about whatever it was I had done. The recess duty called me over, examined my face, and began to smile. She told me that I had long eyelashes and then let me go free.

During a family vacation to San Diego, I wandered into a Tower Records. Noticing that In Utero by Nirvana was only $7.99, I brought it up to the Indian cashier and asked if the instrumentation on the album was more complex than in Nevermind. Bursting with full-fledged stereotypical Indian mannerisms, he angrily informed me that Nirvana killed ( Read more... )

Matt Gamber and I both had Mrs. Vidlak as our first grade teacher, and we quickly became good friends. One day in class Matt came up to me and asked if I would rather be JFK or Lee Harvey Oswald. I was dumbfounded by the question, being unknowledgeable about basic American history. Matt quickly explained that if I was JFK, I would be ( Read more... )

In Ms. Markin's english class, we were all required to give book report presentations. Nathan Sikov's group was assigned a sports novel called "The Danger Zone". During their presentation, they brought in a boom box and played Kenny Loggin's Danger Zone in its entirety. Whenever it reached the chorus, the entire group would burst out laughing ( Read more... )