Palace of the Brine: 3. The Potter's Wheel
**
The Potter's Wheel
On Monday, Jared's wrist-deep into a slab of molding clay when his cellphone rattles on the table next to his studio workbench. Jared leans over and sighs when he recognizes the number as someone calling from Eve's school.
"Every damn time," Jared mutters as he sucks his teeth in and grabs his phone, clay covered hands and all. "Hello?"
"May I please speak with Mr. Padalecki? This is Eve's kindergarten teacher, Mr. Wisdom."
Jared cringes. "Hi, hi yes this is me, I'm Mr. Padalecki-Jared please."
"Jared, I'm afraid I will need to ask you to come down to the school today, there's been an incident."
"Oh my God, is she okay? What happened?" Jared's heart races and he starts to feel dizzy, every horrible thing that could possibly happen to Eve running through his head.
"Now, now there's no need to panic. We just need you to come have a little conference about Eve's behavioral problems," Mr. Wisdom says.
"Eve's behavior problems?" Jared asks, panic turning to relief and then confusion. "I haven't noticed her acting up at home, and I hadn't heard it was happening at school?"
Mr. Wisdom sounds surprised. "You haven't gotten the letters I've been sending home with her babysitter, have you?"
Jared pounds his fist into the clay. "Chad!"
"Yes, I believe that's his name. Anyway, may I expect you later today?"
"Yes, yes I will definitely be there, Mr. Wisdom, talk to you soon." Jared says and hangs up. Then immediately calls Chad up.
"So are you preggers again or what?" Chad answers the phone, sounding like he's talking through a mouthful of his crunchy and noisy library snacks.
Jared takes a deep breath. "Chad, why did I just get a call from Eve's kindergarten teacher about behavior problems I didn't know she was having?"
"I dunno?"
"Chad," Jared says, anger rising.
"That Mr. Wisdom guy is fucking scary dude, I bet he's got the entire class on like, 5 minute increment regiments for snack time and nap time and staring out the window time. He's a control freak."
Jared leans his forehead into his hand, rubbing more clay on his face. "Just, don't keep letters from Eve's teacher from me, all-right?"
"Oh so you don't trust me now? Fine," Chad says and hangs up.
Jared looks bewildered at the phone. "The hell-? I'm supposed to be the hormonal one! Damn it, Chad!"
**
Mr. Robert Wisdom isn't actually the evil kindergarten dictator that Chad makes him out to be, but he certainly is persnickety, maybe a tad on the obsessively organized side, but the kids seem to adore him all the same. Jared thinks that maybe they do get a kick out of the color-coded cubbyholes for their different classroom tools and toys.
Everything in the classroom is so bright and clean and neatly labeled. The way the kids all smile and wave goodbye and how one little boy doesn't want to let go of hugging Mr. Wisdom's left leg shows Jared that despite his exterior of a drill sergeant, or obsessive neat freak, there's got to be a caring person beneath.
He has to, at the very least, like kids in order to be a kindergarten teacher, right? Jared assures himself.
Mr. Wisdom wouldn't last five minutes in Jared's studio without spinning out into some psychotic cleaning rage, that's for damn sure.
Jared shudders at the thought of how Mr. Wisdom would try and turn his world upside down. Jensen's tried a handful of times to help him make sense out of the disorganization, but Jared finds it really more conducive to his working environment to be surround by all his materials in all their disarray.
Mr. Wisdom greets Jared and asks him to sit in one the little red plastic chairs, Jared does so very gingerly, hoping it's tall enough that his knees won't be up to his ears.
"Is it fair to assume that none of my notes made it from Eve's sitter to your hands, Mr. Padalecki?" Mr. Wisdom asks with his hands clasped over his chest. Jared notices that he's wearing a cardigan that Jared could have sworn he saw Mr. Rogers wear on at least 5 separate episodes.
Jared stuffs down that thought and clears his throat. "Um, no they didn't. You'll have to excuse Chad. He was only trying to look out for Eve in his own, semi-irresponsible way. And please, you can call me Jared," Jared says and follows it up with a big smile.
Mr. Wisdom arches an eyebrow. "So, you are keeping this person as Eve's babysitter?"
"He's um, well he's actually also Eve's father. It's a shared custody thing."
Mr. Wisdom chuckles. "I've been living in San Francisco long enough, you know. You could have just said that outright."
"Right, right, thank you for understanding,” Jared says hurriedly. “I'll let Chad know that the notes need to be read by me before he throws them out."
"Or I'll just call, next time."
"Next time?" Jared puzzles. "Has this situation been that bad?"
"Eve decided to stick little Heather Sinclair's pigtails into green paint today when she wouldn't share her crayons with Eve during art time."
Jared rubs his forehead. "But I've told her that paint is only for canvases!" Jared pauses. "Um, I'm an artist. I'm sure this is a mistake, Mr. Wisdom. Eve practically grew up in my studio, literally. I used to have a nursery set up in there, so she knows that you don't play around with materials like that. I'll just tell her-"
"Mr. Padalecki-Jared. It doesn't begin or end there. For the past few weeks Eve has been growing increasingly distant from some of her classmates, lashing out at them or refusing to share or sit quietly during circle time. Then there was the incident yesterday during cookie time," Mr. Wisdom says.
Jared tries as hard as he possibly can to keep from giggling over hearing Mr. Wisdom use the phrase "cookie time" in his stoic, serious tone.
"Eve decided to break little Donny Masterson's giraffe-shaped cookies in half because she said that their necks were too long."
Jared bites the inside of his mouth. "Okay, now that's just weird. Eve loves giraffes! Every time we go to the Zoo, they're a part of the normal rounds right in-between the Elephants and the monkey house."
Mr. Wisdom sighs. "Eve is a wonderful young lady, but in my twenty years of teaching at the pre-school through elementary level, I have seen enough of these spates of antisocial behavior to know the root cause lies in-"
Mr. Wisdom pauses and lowers his voice, "Have you and your separated partner been having problems recently? Or are their problems at home with you and Eve?"
"What? No, I mean, no! Chad and I-oh jeez that's a long story but no, we've not been having problems, I mean he's been snapping at me like crazy lately, and Jensen and I-Jensen is my partner, we raise Eve together during the week, and we've been fine! Never better, in fact! We're about to, and the-" Jared stops, realizing the look of confusion on Mr. Wisdom's face. "I'm not making much sense right now, am I?" Mr. Wisdom shakes his head no. "Okay, so to answer your question, no, Jensen and I are not having problems at home."
"Hm," Mr. Wisdom says, leaning back in his chair. "Really?"
"Yeah, really. Jensen and I have been like, out of some cheesy sitcom with the way we've been doting on each other, and you don't believe a word I'm saying do you? Well it's true!" Jared protests.
Mr. Wisdom raises his index finger, "If I may ask you to back up to something you said earlier, when you mentioned that your former partner, or whatever your relationship was at the time of Eve's conception and birth," he says.
Jared winces inwardly, Mr. Wisdom is getting so close to the truth he's red hot.
"Have been having words with one another?"
"No, he's just, giving me an attitude right now, we haven't really been fighting. Not in front of Eve, I don't think?"
"But he's been agitated towards you?"
"Yeah?"
"And you haven't stopped to consider that it might be that Chad is having problems at home?"
Jared sucks in a breath. "You really think that the way Eve's behaving is because Chad's having, problems with Sophia?"
"Sophia is his?"
"His wife."
"Ah," Mr. Wisdom stands up, and walks towards the classroom, and Jared follows as they watch Eve, happily playing with the little toy animals all lined up in a row, according to height.
"Like I said before, I've been a teacher for over twenty years now, Jared. I know when my kids are reacting to their parents fighting," Mr. Wisdom sighs.
"And if it's not the primary caregivers, well then it makes sense that her bad behavior seems to begin on Mondays after she's been with her other family over the weekends, yes?" Mr. Wisdom says, folding his arms.
Jared wrings his hands. "Thank you, Mr. Wisdom, I'll talk to Chad."
"Please," he says, "you can call me Robert."
**
Jared puts Eve in her car seat without saying a word until she touches his arm and he looks down at her, there's concern written on her face. "Daddy?"
Jared breathes and gives her a reassuring smile. "You really are quite perceptive, aren't you, Evie?"
"What's perceptive?" Eve asks Jared as he gets into the driver's seat.
"It means you know what's going on without someone having to tell you."
"Ohhhh," Eve says, and beams up at him. "I'm very perceptive!"
Jared drops Eve off at home and finds Jensen passed out on the couch still in his scrubs. He pulled a double-shift over the weekend, and must be exhausted. Jared feels a pang of guilt from shaking him awake, but he's got to find out what's going on with Chad.
"C'mon, Jensen. You gotta get up and caffeinate, brew some coffee or something, I have to go out and you need to keep an eye on Eve until I get back."
"Ubbbuh hunnuh?" Jensen mumbles into the couch pillows.
"I said I need you to help me. I know you're exhausted, but I have to go yell at Chad for not telling me numerous things."
"Nnngh," Jensen says flopping over on the couch and kicking his legs like Eve used to do when she didn't want to wear shoes.
"C'mon please," Jared pleads. "Jensen I will owe you a big one, I need to catch Chad before he leaves work. It'll be harder to confront him if Sophia is there."
Jensen quirks an eyebrow at Jared.
"Right, I know, I will explain later when I get to the bottom of it. Go, caffeinate yourself. I'll be back and I'll bring you dinner, okay?"
"I want pizza," Jensen says crossing his arms over his chest and marching into the kitchen. "With lots of pepperoni!"
Jared nods and heads back out to his car, and drives off to the library where Chad works.
The second Jared finds him behind one of the information desks and catches his eye, Chad looks like a deer caught in headlights for all of ten seconds. Then he immediately leaves and makes a beeline into the maze of bookshelves. Jared sighs inwardly and goes after him, almost losing track of him in the reference section. But the sound of a door quickly slamming shut catches his attention.
The quiet room. It's Chad's way of telling Jared he doesn't want to talk.
"Not getting out that easily, buddy," Jared says to himself and follows him into the eerily silent room. There's a few scholarly looking types reading books and one person typing on a laptop in the corner, and Chad's sitting at the front desk, trying to look inconspicuous behind a very large world atlas.
Jared pulls the book down and catches Chad's gaze again.
Chad freezes up and then after a beat relaxes his shoulders and gives him a "What?" look.
Jared feels his eyes go wide and looks back at him incredulously, trying to non-verbally convey his shock and frustration.
Chad shrugs nonchalantly.
Jared rolls his eyes and stands up as straight as he can at his full height, looking down angrily at Chad sitting below him, like he's looking at an irritating insect on the ground.
Chad clears his throat. "I forget how tall you are sometimes," he says quietly.
"I slouch," Jared whispers back to him. Then nods his head to the door. "C'mon, let's talk."
Chad breathes out and follows Jared out of the quiet room and they find a mostly-empty section in the stacks for them to talk in. Chad leans against the bookshelf and slides his hands into his pockets. "I'm sorry about the letters. Let's just get that out of the way."
Jared nods, "It's okay."
"It's just-that freakin' teacher of hers, man! He could tell right from the start the first time I came to pick her up that Eve was acting up because she was reacting to-" Chad sucks his teeth in. "Yeah, that."
"Yeah, he's pretty sharp, I didn't expect that from a guy in a Mr. Rogers sweater, y'know?"
Chad shrugs his shoulders. "And that's why I told him I was just the babysitter. It was easier at the time than to listen to any armchair marriage counseling he wanted to give me. From then on, I just kind of went with it. Maybe it was like escapism, y'know? I just wasn't ready to talk about it and then-"
"Yeah, about that," Jared says, cutting Chad off, "I'm gonna have to say, now's the time to talk about it." Jared pauses, steeling himself. "So, since when have you and Sophia needed marriage counseling? Armchair, dimestore or otherwise?"
"Maybe, um, this year has just been kind of rough on us-"
"This year?" Jared asks. "This has been going on for a year?"
Chad scratches his neck. "Yeah..."
"How bad is it right now?"
Chad shifts back and forth, moving his weight from foot to foot. He looks down at his feet, rather then Jared's face. "You know how, when you look at Eve you just-you just know how much you love her. There's nothing to question or worry about, you just feel it undeniably that she's the greatest thing in your life?
"I feel like that when I look at Jeremy and Jason too, I just love them without question. And I bet when you're with Jensen, you feel like that too. You're in love with him and all the good outweighs anything bad, any stupid fights you might have along the way. You know that under all that, he's the love of your life."
Jared nods. "I do."
"I look at Sophia, and I'm not sure I feel that way anymore. We have more bad days than good ones. And it just starts to feel useless, trying force us into the same place, make us fit together again."
"Chad..." Jared puts his arm around Chad's shoulder, pulling him into a hug. "What are you gonna do?"
"I don't know yet. We're talking about some things."
Jared pulls back from Chad and squeezes his shoulders, reassuringly. "Well when you figure it out, I'm here for you. Both of you. Or if you just need to dump the boys off for a weekend?"
Chad snorts. "Yeah, right."
Jared smiles. "I'll buy a muzzle for the biter. One of them's a biter, right? Or is it both."
Chad rolls his eyes and then pinches Jared's belly. "Yeah, you and the baby makes two now, I bet you could take 'em."
Jared slaps Chad's hand away. "Chad!"
"What! I'm just saying."
"You just can't have one serious moment, can you?"
"Nope," Chad shakes his head and pinches Jared's hips. "You gonna get love handles again? You know you totally had love handles the last time you got all-" Jared smacks his hand off again.
"I hate you."
**
"Okay so," Jared says as he slides under the covers next to Jensen. "I talked to my boss at the University, and they're going to let me defer my teaching assignment a semester and I can pick up again next Fall. Or hey, if we've done the math right; and if I'm feeling up to it then, I could do summer classes."
Jensen smiles. "Hey, that's so great!"
"Guess I'm doing something right, there," Jared says and leans in to kiss Jensen.
"Yeah, you're doin' something all-right," Jensen says, shifting around underneath the sheets, wrapping his arms around Jared's neck and bringing himself closer. Jensen's mouth on his collarbone, working up his neck and nipping his chin. Jared moans and nuzzles Jensen's face.
Jensen runs his hand down Jared's chest, over his t-shirt and starts to lift it when panic sets in and Jared pulls back.
"No, no, no-no, um, no. No I am not-no."
Jensen wriggles his jaw. "So, that's a no?"
"I can't, Jensen. It's just, I'm not comfortable-"
"Sex is just for procreation," Jensen says, rolling his eyes. "Gotcha."
Jared feels a pang of guilt. "Jensen, that's not fair. You know I don't feel entirely comfortable like this."
"Bullshit!" Jensen says, shaking his head. "First you're not comfortable with yourself because you can't get miraculously and impossibly pregnant, and now you're not comfortable with letting me touch you?"
Jared does see Jensen's point, but it isn't enough to take away his discomfort with the idea of Jensen and him doing-anything even remotely arousing at this point.
"Dude, I have hormones running through my body and things are happening that should not normally happen. You don't get to be upset with me for acting weird, remember?" Jared says, Jensen shrugs.
"Remember 'no one expects you to know how to handle this, Jared'," Jared says, poking Jensen in the side, reminding him of the speech he gave him.
Jensen huffs. "Damn your logic. How many months do we have left?" he says, flopping back onto the pillows. "Oh, before I forget, did you book the tickets to Dallas for Thanksgiving?"
"I did it last month, Jensen. I thought I told you," Jared says with a yawn.
"You probably did," Jensen says as he moves closer to let Jared snuggle up to his side. Jensen threads his fingers through Jared's hair, rubbing his scalp.
"Ugh, my brain is so fried these days, Jared. Between the hospital and Eve and trying to coach Katie through her daily life crisis' and now another to start freaking out about..."
"Wow," Jared says, "well, has seeing that counselor helped at all?"
"Uhhhh," Jensen stalls.
Jared sits up, "I thought Dr. Ferris didn't give you much of a choice with that? She was pretty damn clear that you had to make an appointment to see that Dr. Collins guy?"
"Yeah, and I did. I made an appointment."
Jared sighs, "But you didn't keep it, did you? Jensen, what is the big deal with seeing a therapist for just one session."
"I don't want some stranger in my head, okay? Yes, therapy is great and for some people? It works really, really well. I am just not one of those kinds of people."
"Because your idea of therapy is getting drunk with Mike and Tommy."
"Jared, doctors don't like to be doctored, okay?"
"I know that. I dealt with you when you caught that flu bug last year. But this isn't about someone wanting to shrink you or diagnose you, this is about someone you can confide in and release all this stress and tension you're carrying."
"Meh," Jensen grumbles.
"Jensen," Jared says, his tone warning. "It might make you feel better."
"You know what kind of therapy I need? Thanksgiving at home in Texas with dad carving the turkey and making Leatherface jokes. I need my mom's sweet potatoes and homemade stuffing."
Jensen takes a deep breath, saying: "I need to watch the game with my brother and my sister and Eve can be doted on by her grandparents-in-law while you eat pumpkin pie and pass out with your head in my lap so I can play with your hair while you're sleeping and make you wake up looking like Robert Smith,"
Jensen sighs. "When I have that? I'll feel better."
Jared settles back against Jensen's side, pillowing his head on Jensen's shoulder. "Mmm, that does sound nice."
"It will be nice," Jensen says leaning his head closer to Jared and drifting off as he curls into him.
**
The museum is just as empty as Jared remembers the first dream, but that doesn't last for long as the chunk of temple wall he's leaning on opens like two sliding doors, and she walks in.
She's tall, taller than Jared for one thing. Maybe seven feet high, and atop her crown, a single frog sits. All the other frogs leap out from wherever they'd been hiding, congregating at her feet.
Jared shuffles back as she leans in to get a better look at him, and opens her mouth.
"It's coming," she says. And Jared wakes up.
**
It would have been nice, if Jared hadn't answered the phone the day before they were supposed to fly out to Dallas, and had his father inform him that the "family dinner" Jared had agreed to back in September, was going to be Thanksgiving.
"You can't be serious," Jared says to him. "We've had this trip planned for weeks! And you're just now telling me that I have to cancel it and, y'know what? Fuck that, Dad. I'm not canceling our plans just because you call up at the last freaking minute and-"
"So that little corner of heaven and earth I moved around for you to keep your record clear of any charges and the exorbitant fee I paid the museum, you'd like me to take that all back?"
Jared squeezes the receiver as hard as he can, but it's doesn't change the situation he's in. Jared looks at the opened suitcases on the bed. He can hear Jensen and Eve down the hall laughing as he helps her pack.
"Let me just, um," Jared bites down hard on the inside of his mouth. He feels sick down to the core, but it's not from any kind of morning sickness. "Let me talk to them."
"We'll see you tomorrow, dinner's at four," Jared's father says as he hangs up.
Jared pulls at the bed sheets, knots his fingers together and releases them a few times. All his tension always goes straight to his hands. Jared walks over to Eve's room where she's jumping on her little pink suitcase to get it closed.
"It's not going to fit, Evie," Jensen says as he watches her.
"It'll fit!" Eve says back and then her case springs open, toppling her to one side.
Jensen stifles a chuckle and goes over to help her up. "Evie, you're going to have to pick just one stuffed animal to take to Grandma and Grandpa's."
"But I want to show Grandma them all! She said she wanted to see all my stuffed aminals."
"Animals. Eve, if you're a good girl, maybe Grandma and Grandpa will have a present for you, and how are we gonna carry it home if there's no room in your suitcase?" Jared interrupts from the doorway.
"Ohhh," Eve says, looking at the overspill of toys from her pink suitcase. "I guess bunny and bear can stay home, but I want to take Pony and Fable!" Eve says, picking out her stuffed rabbit and teddy bear, and leaving in her unicorn and the purple seahorse Jensen brought over after she was born. "Can I pleeeeeeease?" she pleads to Jared.
"That seems like a good compromise," Jared says leaning in to Jensen to whisper, "Hey, I need to talk to you."
Jensen nods and follows him out into the hallway. "What's going on?"
"My dad," Jared says, with a bitter laugh. "You're going to hate me."
"I'm not going to hate you, Jared. Talk to me, what happened with your father?"
Jared takes a deep breath. "It's, um-"
Jensen rolls his eyes. "Jared, I can tell when you're holding in a big ol' babbling explanation. Just let it out."
"I was so frustrated that I thought that the curse of Khnum was gone so I went to the anthropology museum and I found this statue of the goddess of childbirth there and she had been in my dreams a lot ever since I saw her when I was on that field trip in class and stupid Brock Kelly wouldn't shut up about my Egyptian pieces so anyway I went back to the museum and I smashed this little clay idol of Heqet," Jared says, with a rambling start
"Heck-what?" Jensen says.
"Heqet," Jared continues after another deep breath, saying, "that's the fertility goddess I mentioned before, she's got a frog on her head but I have no idea why and then of course I did this in broad daylight because I'm a crazy person who thinks that in order to get pregnant I have to piss off some Egyptian god by breaking something with their face on it."
Jared pauses, "Which by the way I've been wondering if that's true then how am I the only one affected and not the thousands of clumsy museum delivery boys out there?"
"Regardless," Jared says, trying to get back on track, "So in order to get the museum to not sue me or press charges or put it on my permanent record I had to call up my dad and his lawyer worked some kind of legal miracle and in return I had to promise that we'd go to a family dinner at their place one night."
"Which brings me to the point of my story, is that I never thought he'd pick Thanksgiving to do it, but damn it, it's just like him to spring something like this at the last minute and expect that we could just drop our plans and come over," Jared drops his arms to his side, shrugging his shoulders in defeat.
"But he did. And I have to."
Jensen just stares at him, flat expression.
"Jensen?"
"Who the hell is Brock Kelly?"
Jared breathes out. "One of my students."
"Oh good, because from his name it sounds like someone that would do softcore porn."
Jared smiles. "I'm glad you're more upset that I was hanging out with a porn star than the rest of it."
"No, I am the least upset about that, Jared. I'm trying to take on small things, rather than the big huge ones. Now, I am going to call my mother, and you are going to tell her why she's not going to see her granddaughter tomorrow, okay? And then I will help Eve unpack," Jensen says, turning.
"Okay, so you are mad at me, that's fine! I expected that," Jared says. "I'll just-you let me know when you're done being mad, and you're ready to tell me how I can make it up to you, okay?"
Jensen nods and walks back into Eve's room. Jared falls against the wall and listens to the muffled sounds of Jensen breaking the news to Eve. He looks down and realizes he's touching his stomach absentmindedly.
"You better appreciate this," Jared whispers.
**
There's not as much tension the next day as they drive to Jared's parents place in Atherton, but Jared can still see Jensen white-knuckling the steering wheel when they make the turn to that familiar street and he can see the house he grew up in.
"We can leave after dinner," Jared reassures Jensen. "I have a pumpkin pie from Whole Foods defrosting in the fridge."
"Mmhmm," Jensen says, keeping his eye on the driveway as he pulls in next to what Jared recognizes as his older brother's Midnight Blue Mercedes and his little sister's Cherry-Red Porsche. "Looks like the in-laws are here," Jensen murmurs.
"Just say the word and I can tell Eve to fake sick and we'll leave. I also have Chad on standby to call you from the 'hospital' with an emergency."
Jensen eyebrows Jared as he stops the car. "We just got here, Jared. You know I've lasted more than an hour with your parents on several occasions, right?"
"I know, I just," Jared pauses as he unbuckles Eve and coaxes her out of the backseat. "I feel bad about this, still."
"Don't feel bad," Jensen says. "Besides, I've got Mike on call to fake an emergency page for me."
Jared shakes his head and takes Eve by the hand, leading her up the steps to the ornate front door. He takes a deep breath and rings the bell. Nothing happens for about ten seconds and Jared turns to Jensen.
"Oh well, no one's answering. Lets go order sushi and eat it with cranberry sauce and call it a night. Maybe catch a red-eye to Dallas-"
Jensen rolls his eyes as Jared's mother throws open the door dramatically, a martini glass in one hand, a skewer of olives in the other.
"Jared! My baby! My other baby! Jensen! Come in, come in!" Jared steps forward and lets his mother hug and give him her requisite air-kisses. He feels a mild sense of hope, maybe this won't be as horrible as he thought.
"Oh and before you ask, of course you can go use the upstairs bedroom to change into something more appropriate for dinner, Jared."
"This is what I'm wearing-" Jared starts.
His mother interrupts. "Well, I didn't realize those were the nicest pair of jeans you had, Jared. Now let's go get you all settled in! Eve, I'm sure would love to see all the presents Grandma has got for her, yes?"
"Yes!" Eve says and Jensen gives Jared a sympathetic smile.
Jared bites down on the inside of his mouth and follows his mother and Jensen down the foyer, past all the huge paintings from his family's art collection. They’re mostly flowers and landscapes; things that never particularly interested him when he was starting in art school.
"I've always wished you'd paint me something nice to hang here, Jared," his mother sighs at the end of the hall.
"I'm not a painter, Mom."
Jared's mother sips her drink. "Don't mutter Jared, it's rude. Look who's here!" she says to the drawing room full of family and thankfully, more liquor. Jared instinctively heads towards the open bar while his siblings and in-laws are fawning over Eve.
Jensen slaps his hand away from the bottle of Maker's Mark he was reaching for. "Jared, you can't drink that right now," Jensen says under his breath.
Jared breathes. "Damn it. Okay, you have to get drunk for me."
"How does that logic work?"
"It just does, okay?"
Jensen frowns. "I thought I was still supposed to be mad at you." Jensen leans closer to whisper in Jared's ear. "Shouldn't you promise to at least feel me up a little while I'm tipsy?"
Jared grins and before he can respond appropriately, his father interrupts his train of thought, picking Eve up and cooing to her while she laughs.
"Well there's my granddaughter! There she is! You know Eve, if your grandpa hadn't moved a corner of heaven and earth for your Daddy, you'd be in Texas right now? And that means we wouldn't get to spoil you rotten like only your real grandparents should get to," he says. Jared can feel Jensen tensing at his side.
"Dad," Jared starts, but his mother cuts him off.
"Not just your grandparents-in-common-law or-Jared have you figured out that yet? What's the politically correct term for, his family."
"The… excuse me?" Jensen says, bewildered.
Jared wants to crawl under the table.
Jared's brother looks up from his Blackberry. "He means what should we call you? Gay husband in-laws-if you've gotten married yet, that is."
"They haven't, living in sin, you know!" Jared's mother crows and lifts her glass to Jensen. "When are you going to make honest men out of one another?"
"I think it's still illegal, Mom," Jared's sister says.
"Oh is that what those protestors were shouting about on the local news the other day?" his mother wonders aloud.
"Take. The damn. Shot," Jared says through his teeth, and Jensen complies, drinking straight from the bottle while all eyes are back on Eve.
**
Jared bumps Jensen's shoulder over dinner. "How's your Diver scallop and lobster mashed-up thing?"
"If I squint, and drink more, it almost tastes like stuffing," Jensen says back, gulping down more wine that Jared can't have.
Jared's almost tempted to run his tongue along Jensen's lower lip to get that drop of red just sitting there. But Jensen's tongue darts out before Jared can finish weighing out the pros and cons of doing that at the table.
Jared's father and brother are locked in some intense discussion. Jared's little sister and sister-in-law are busy fussing over Eve and Jared's mother has gone upstairs for an aspirin to counteract all the martinis she'd downed before dinner started, so it's not entirely out of the question to try something a little risky at the table.
Jared leans in to Jensen's neck and breathes down soft, mouth almost able to run along the curve of his body there when Jared's brother interrupts. He's standing behind his chair and he smacks the back of Jared's head.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" he shouts and Jared goes immediately on the defense, jumping up out of his own seat.
Jared sputters "What? I'm not, we were just-" Don't do this in front of my kid, you ass, Jared thinks.
Judge me and Jensen all you want in your spare time, just don't make me explain to my daughter why I had to give her uncle a civil rights speech over Thanksgiving dinner. God damn, I wish we were in Texas.
"You broke another fucking statue?" Jared's brother says, this time punctuating it with a derisive laugh. "You're an idiot."
"Hey," Jensen starts, but Jared's father cuts him off, stepping in between the two of them.
"I think of it more like he's incurably spontaneous. You know how artists are, right son?"
Jared breathes. "It's not like that, I was-"
"You were what? Trying to get yourself-ohh. Oh my God, seriously? Is that why you did that?" Jared's brother blinks and then reaches for the hem of Jared’s sweater. "Are you hiding it under there again?"
Jared smacks his brother's hand away, standing up straight enough to look down at him as best he can. "Don't touch me. You're drunk." But Jared's brother reaches in again, and Jared has to keep slapping him away, while their father tries to break it apart.
"Who's drunk?" Jared's mother asks, walking into the room.
"Jared's pregnant again," Jared's brother says and Jared punches him, or at least he tries to, but his brother ducks and so Jared ends up clocking his father.
Jensen tries to crawl under the table and thankfully Jared's sisters had the foresight to get Eve out of earshot.
"Oh, Dad I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Jared says leaning down to help his father up, and crap, he's got a bloody nose. "I am so sorry."
Jared's father grabs a napkin off the table and uses it to stuff up his nose.
"Well, is it true then, dear? Are you expecting another little unnatural miracle?" Jared's mom says to Jensen, who looks like he'd rather die than answer the question.
"Ummm, I should go check on Eve, I think she's calling for me," Jensen says quickly.
"Well I guess I was wrong about who was sitting on top between the two of you! Or whatever you call it, the pitcher and the hitter? No, that's not right, hold on, I wrote it down on my PFLAG pamphlet!" Jared's mother says as she rifles around in one of the table drawers. "You know, I always thought it was a height thing, but I guess not!"
"Oh god," Jared mutters and sits down, feeling his stomach twist.
"Are you going to get morning sick all over the table?" Jared's brother asks him, and Jared gives him a swift kick in the shin in response.
**
"Hey," Jensen whispers to him after they get back and put Eve to bed. Jared's on the couch, drifting in and out of sleep with his head pillowed in Jensen's lap. "I'm not mad at you."
"Really?" Jared asks in a sleepy voice.
"Yeah, I think I kind of lost all right to want to punish you after that," Jensen says and Jared sighs.
"I'm sorry about my family."
"I'm just glad for whatever they did to end up with you, you know?" Jensen rubs his forehead, trying to smooth the worry lines Jared's making. "Maybe they broke a statue of the Egyptian god of people who are handsome, artistic, kind and wonderful fathers."
Jared laughs. "I'm sure that must have been it."
"The ancients called him 'Jared-siris'. You know he had a lover? Sphinx-ackles. They lived for many happy, sex-filled centuries together."
Jared laughs again. "God I hope so," and Jensen takes Jared's hands into his own and squeezes them.
I think I might be cursed, Jared thinks to himself.
**
The Inundation