It's me!
All of you have permission to visit me at NYU.

If you need a noun after this, do you also need one after that ( Read more... )

Emily vs. Life advice from someone else's brother: Round 1
Nadine vs. Rubix Cube: Round 2
Emily and Dan vs. Friendship: Round 3

With the monarchy

You see…

The nobles didn’t pay taxes

And peasants couldn’t relax’es

The nation was almost bankrupt

Because the economy sucked

Marie-Antoinette, the deficit queen

Spent all the money on things obscene

“Hey, that’s where political porn came from!”

So with all that discontent

The third estate set up a tent

In a tennis ( Read more... )

Colleges, leave me alone. I'm tired of all of your enticing. I know that when it comes down to it, you don't really want me. You're leading me on ( Read more... )

My parents didn't notice. I'm back in my house.
I really hope that I didn't step in vomit.
Today was a great day.

"Everyone wants my meat cookies."

"I was going to kill him, but then I realized that I would rather have his babies."

"I wish I had a blow hole."
"You do have one."
(Hearty laughter followed by awkward silence followed by awkward laughter.)

"We'll make lanky people out of macaroni and smash them!"

I am so good at making terrible decisions.

Eye contact is overrated.

I should never play good idea bad idea.
I always lose.