Looking for a post with reference to a news article in 2003 today, I came across some REAL gems. Thanks god for livejournal archives. Have a gander:

him - I applied for a mortage today

me - what's a mortage?

him - don't play games with my spelling

me - no, I'm serious

him - it's morgtage maybe

- it's a house loan

me - good luck.

Mark: "Oh ya, I was peeing. You see, I walked over there to go pee, and then got distracted and went to feed the cats. Then I came into the kitchen to get the cat food, and got distracted by the Dr Pepper in the fridge. Then I forgot what I was doing."

"huh".

The guy I'm seeing gave me fleas for Valentines Day. I love gifts I can share with my roomate and cat.

Actually, it's just one flea. I can't find it, but I know it's in there.

The Official Canadian Temperature ( Read more... )

Mark: "how about this: 'i really like you, but i'm not sure how you feel because you've never really told me. I just want to know if I can lean in and kiss you ( Read more... )

Ben's Recipe for Social Suicide (Just like Grandma used to make ( Read more... )

I'm watching the new movie "Awake" with bnpZack last night. In the opening credits:

"28 million people receive general anesthetic every year"Ben: "I wonder if they mean just in the States, or the whole world ( Read more... )

An 86-year-old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached ( Read more... )

Dave says ( Read more... )

why is it so hard for everyone to believe I like snatch?


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