Chuque,  are these your people?

http://www.newsok.com/big-cat-injures-wagoner-sanctuary-volunteer/article/3317094

Spite Club was kind of a turkey and the first five comics in a row were either fighting for air or people who have yet to find all their funny anyway...people were walking and the front row was bored.  Jimmy Roulette got up and beat some funny into them but he had to work them.  I Planned to do two setups and get off early; it was already turning ( Read more... )

I've been trying to write political jokes and every time I start on a good rant that might yield something funny, it starts to turn into a semi-plausible idea........WHICH IS NOT FUNNY ( Read more... )

I have developed at taste for Bulleit bourbon.  I have learned however that it is in poor taste to order two shots of Bulleit at the same time by asking for "A Beatles Reunion".

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Apparently I've been selling myself short.  I rested 5 minutes on the last set and got to 24 on the exhaustion set.  Which is 3 more than my initial test without having done 40-something pushups first.  No more knee pushups.

I broke off while I was in the Valley helping Mom move ( Read more... )

1.  Old men and homophobia.

There's a point in a straight man's life, it seems to be between 50 and 60, where they go from having a median level of subtextual homophobia to being totally relaxed about it or totally anti-gay.   I think that moment happens with the onset of prostate trouble.

We go to a doctor, unable to piss and with a pain pills won't ( Read more... )

Chuque and Nathan have inspired me.

I can't run (at all) until I finish a course of rehab for my knees.

I can, however, still do a pushup.

21 pushups before giving up in my initial test, actually.  So I'm starting at level 3.

Sung to the tune of "I'll Fly Away."

Some bright morning, when this job is o'er,
   I'll fly away.
To my home on the Padre Island Shore
  I'll Fly away.

CHORUS:
I'll fly away, Oh Glory!  I'll fly away.
Unless my bag has some mouthwash and a ra--ag
I'll Fly away!

Unless I have more than one bag to carry on
Then, I can't fly away.
Or my suitcase weighs an ( Read more... )