i'm not big on holidays but somehow this thanksgiving season strikes me some feelings. last thanksgiving i was in jail. the thanksgiving before that, i was with becky and her dad's girlfriend's relatives; the time in which I tasted the worst key-lime pie ever.. but I remember it also being one of the nicest holidays I've had. I miss the times ( Read more... )

getting rid of an addiction is like trying to stop oneself from having post-break up sex ( Read more... )

Paranormal Activity was fucking ridiculous!   It was so bad I would've left in the middle of it hadn't I been watching it with friends.  But as it went on, it got to the point where it's too ridiculous that people had to laugh. We couldn't just watch it blank-faced, expecting to see something scary anymore... because at that point we all knew (and ( Read more... )

this waking nightmare must come to an end. 

 I don't know if it's the medicine that I've recently been taking or the mindless lifestyle, but I have changed.
I vaguely remember who I used to be.  At least the part that I would like to remember anyway.  It doesn't threaten me anymore;  my lazyness, my apathy, sense of being average or below it, feeling gross and numb.  It just doesn't matter ( Read more... )

 it's impossible to truly give up on oneself.

I was just reading a few of my old emails... Among them was a livejournal entry from the time when I was heartbroken; during the period which I also struggled with English much more then the present time.  It was just so plainly... BAD.  I almost burst out a laughter.  It was amazing how corny and stupid it sounded.  Then again, I'm pretty sure ( Read more... )

what the hell.  apparently this meditation place is not gonna work.  i'm out of my options.  
but damn it, i might as well enjoy the time i've got left.
 

Until today, my deportation seemed like it was happening either way.  To avoid going to prison I had to go into a drug rehab, but going into a drug rehab made me deportable.  My last option was to go into one of those psych wards but obviously, I wasn't crazy enough and get this, to receive long-term care you need to be receiving long-term care in ( Read more... )

 Dear Sir/Madam,

I would like to briefly show how devastated my life has become by the consequence so far of my irrational behavior I exhibited on the day of June, 15th, 2009, which was also my birthday.  Under no circumstance I could excuse myself for doing what I did.  However, I feel as if I am awaiting ( Read more... )