Yesterday sucked. BAD. School was fine, hell, nothing interesting happened. I got home, called Bre. She said she had to go take a shower before youth group. I got on the internet and my friend melissa sent me and im. "Oh my god, I can't beleive that Bre's doing that right now! AHHHHH!" And I was like "Taking a shower? <-- Just called her ( Read more... )

I feel great. Indecribable. I hate him, I HATE NATHAN. I thought I was gonna be in love with him forever, feel bad forever. Now I hate him. This morning, I went to the social worker, and told her everything. I needed to vent. She said to me that some of that was verbal abuse, like when he kept trying to pressure me to give him a blow job at ( Read more... )

I'll go eat, cuz I've barely eaten all week. (Yesterday I ate more than any other day since Monday... I had a chicken sandwhich.) I'm gonna get some much needed sleep, because that's another thing I've been deprived of this week ( Read more... )

I wanna explain how I feel right now, because I don't wanna vent to my school friends, they have their own problems and shit. Today, as usual, I felt my heart break some more. Nathan was holding Noel's hand. But.... I didn't react. I felt like crying but I can't. Maybe I just cried myself out last night? I dunno.... I feel crappy. I do ( Read more... )

I'm just so damned confused. I'm not allowed to hug him, I'm not allowed to be around him as much. Just because Noel said so. What's so wrong with a hug? It means nothing to him and makes me feel better.

I feel like doing something destructive to myself. I wanna cut, but I can't do that anymore, cuz I promised myself. I was thinking of just stealing the alcohol from the fridge or something. Anything. I just wanna make this pain go away. I feel so shitty. God, I just wanna hurt myself bad. I would have done stuff with friggin John Dempsey at ( Read more... )

Heh, today was weird. I was in a shitty mood this morning, as usual. Mornings just aren't my thing. I avoided Bre, which helped. I hate the third wheel thing. So I went with Mel, Zach, and Laura on a grand adventure to turn in all of Zach's late work before the first bell rang. That was fun ( Read more... )

So, today I'm walking down the hall, and I'm about to pass Nathan. After all the shit about me needing to leave me alone, he waved at me. So then I got confused. I guess we're talking to eachother again, and he's completely acting like he wasn't an ass to me the last couple of weeks. Whatever ( Read more... )

I'm over Nathan, except for the fact I dream about him a lot. But I figure that's just part of my mind getting over him. I saw him today and smiled at him just to confuse him, cuz we've been avoiding looking at eachother since last thursday ( Read more... )

Today was boring. Getting over Nathan better than ever. Not much else to say.

Today was boring as hell, but I was in a good mood. Nothing exciting to say.