I am broken. and I am jaded. Despite my best efforts, I am forced to admit this in the early morning hours after the day is done and my thoughts cannot be drowned out any longer. I hurt. My heart hurts. My soul hurts. And I am so broken. This world, it wears on me and I long for the day when My Savior comes and I am healed ( Read more... )

Never has a song seemed so appropriate for my life. I know what they want me to do but I don't know how to do it. You've become so ingrained in my life. I don't know how to do it without you. How can I not? My heart hurts. like my best friend just died. it really hurts. and my best friends are still alive. God, get me through this. Show me what you

I believe in grace. I believe in the saving and changing power of grace. I believe that your past does not define you. It does not set the course of your future. It creates who you've become but it does not mandate who you are. or what you will be. I believe in learning from the past to make better tomorrows. I believe who you once were doesn't ( Read more... )

I can do better, huh? That's what you think. But you only get a very tiny glimpse. You don't see what I see or know what I know. You don't get to see what he looks like when he lets his guard down. The way he can't hide the way his face lights up for a moment at work when you tell him you get off unexpectedly early just about the same time he does ( Read more... )

It's funny how just a few months can make such a huge difference. You have made even more of an impact in my life, for the better, in just a few short months. days, really. or so it seems. I strive to be intentional with you. It doesn't always happen and half the time I wish I was better at it. But I am learning. and will continue to learn. ( Read more... )

Because of the impact you've had on my life, these dreams that I had-the ones that broke my heart and crushed my soul (or at least that's how it felt like on occasion), they don't hurt when they are being fulfilled in their lives. It doesn't hurt when they get to live them out. the hurt is gone.

If nothing else I want you to know how much your presence in my life has meant. You gave this broken, hardened heart hope. You showed me that there are still decent people in this world. People that are much too special for words to describe. Oh, God knew what He was doing when He made you and fashioned you into who you are today. And if you are ( Read more... )

i am not moving forward. I am simply drifting, utterly lost and devoid of emotion. i envision myself in situations full of suffering so i may feel again. i can feel the pain, the fear, the bitterness, brokenness, the heartbreak of the darkest night so that i may live in the joy and delight and brokenness of the morning, of the rebuilding. i am not ( Read more... )

But it's me. I am the problem. Even though God has ripped this from my hands, from out of my grasp, out of my reach--my heart still holds the pieces. It refuses to say, "here, you broke me, you shattered my dream so heal the pieces of my heart-put them back together, bind them up. show me. teach me. love me. i trust you and refuse to put anything ( Read more... )

I don't understand how she still gets to win. IT FREAKING IRRITATES THE CRAP OUT OF ME. Something stupid that I've been looking forward to all week. And she still wins. And I lose. And get stuck sitting at home doing nothing. and it hurts and breaks my heart more than it already is broken. I hate this.