what i wouldnt give to die. to end all of this bullshit. i want to, i realy do. im so sick of life. im sick of being unhappy. im sick of always being the one broken down. im sick of everything. sometimes the best way to say goodbye is to never say anything at all.

i dont know what to do. my movements are in quick twitches. i feel like im drowning or something. i dont want to feel this way anymore. i wish i could pick my head up out of the water, but the harder i try, the harder i fail. its so hard to think when your head is throbbing. im falling apart just trying to hold myself together. nice guys ( Read more... )

so i was just talking to ed online and all of a sudden he disapeard. im fucking pissed off, on top of that im begining to feel like shit so its pissing me off even more. fuck fuck fuck!!! i wish i knew how to handle things. i dont ever want to hear another sad story about a girl who's boyfriend doesnt treat them fucking right!

i just talked to ed a couple minutes ago. i miss him alot. i seem to be missing alot lately. im afraid of what the future holds. i just want to go back in time. go back to all my memories of the past. i miss everything we used to share, im not finished sharing with you. ill share with you forever. even after your finished sharing with me. ( Read more... )

stuff... yeah, things are going ok. right now im just wondering why a certain someone just seemed to get realy pissed off at me for no aparent reason. its strange, one minute everything is fine and then the next they dont seem to want to talk to you or even be near you. whatever though. im just bord and ranting. spring should be here pretty ( Read more... )

spring is going to be here pretty soon, although we had a realy mild winter so i didnt mind the weather all year. this year is going by faster than any other year ever has for me. alot has happend. mostly things that arent realy that good. but there are also alot of things that i want to work on. there are certain people that i dont want to ( Read more... )

i have had this live journal for i would say about a year atleast and i have only written in it once. i guess i just never know what to right about when i try. but i would realy like to write about my thoughts lately. i seem to alway be finding myself thinking about the past of about 2 years ago. i could just be sitting at work and a very ( Read more... )

Yeah, so this is my first entry in this journal thing. I dont realy know what to write in here. Right now i am just waiting for Holly to get home so I can talk to her. What a wonderful girl she is. I'm a little confused about me and her, but its a good confusion so I dont want it to go away. Things were had been bad for me for a long time ( Read more... )