So it is not official...yet. in a few days it will be. I have been thinking and planning. I think our wedding will be amazing. I can't post this on fb because it isn't official. This page is so obscured from my current reality that I can post whatever I want. ;)

Watching a documentary on Waco Texas. Remembering my stay at madden mental health hospital, there was a kid there that said he was the messiah and that I was an angel. There was diverse crowd there. There as a hand full of crack head and heroine addicts, but then there were the ones that were seriously mentally ill. My room mate swore she invented ( Read more... )

I havent viewed this blog in years. Most of the posts cause my stomach to flip and my cheeks to flush with embarrassment. I suppose anyone at the age of thirty looking back on themselves in thier early twenties would feel the same. (If not, please dont tell me. Let me find solace in that illusion)

I guess the curiosity to read down memory lane was ( Read more... )

I have 3 years clean from drugs an alcohol. I really cant say where the time has went. Though this has been progress for me considering where I was at mentally, emotionally, and physically 4 yrs. ago ( Read more... )

I have in the past year...fried old phone. Lost contacts and etc. Now I am changing my number which means that people that really love me know how to contact me others are oblivious to my existence. I could have slashed my fucken throat!

So for those that care. Here is my number.
312-37MStar

I hate being in limbo. I have been for the past three months, staying stagnant. It is starting to smell like bowel movements that have sat in the sun.

I do not know what to do next. What move to make.

Fuck I would hate it if I died tomorrow and had to wait in purgatory. I can just imagine it from the current events of my life.

I have a crush on a recovering junkie. I am attracted to addicts, or people with the addict personality.

the end.

love.

Ok. So I am often in my car. Driving about the south and west side of the city. Which means that I have plenty of time to listen to the shitty radio, as I dont really have cassettes, my tape adapter is busted, and I dont know how to get my stock radio out and put in my cd player car radio ( Read more... )

I guess something could be said for someone that has a handfull of people that she can say she loved ( Read more... )

Slipping on the ground that I so gingerly place my feet is ice. The cold freezing embraces grab at me sending chills through out my being. shivering and chattering is all hat can be heard in the darkness that is my nightmare. Nothing else exists but the slippery ground that i try so hard to steady my balance and the sounds of frost. Frost cackling ( Read more... )