I can never seem to just, relax. Even while I'm asleep stupid shit continues to haunt me. I'm just too stressed out. Just sick off all this shit. Paying rent, bills, working a job that doesn't pay as much as it should..all I do is work. I schedule my entire life around freaking work and it is bullshit. I have a week off coming up in May and I  ( Read more... )

I don't want to work tonight. I had a good time yesterday and I'm way sleep deprived. I worked on Wednesday night and got home around 8 a.m. I couldn't get to sleep until about 11 and I woke up at 3 p.m. cause I'd made plans with Chad, Chely, Steve and Ricky to go to happy hour at El Torito. We met up over there at around 5:30 and had a good time. ( Read more... )

I have been in pain for three days now. It doesn't feel too bad right now but I started having the gnarliest back pain on Saturday on the way to take Chely out for the birthday dinner. I was driving like an asshole because of it and my back still hurts right now but not as bad. I've been putting these cold and heat patches on it and taking vicodin ( Read more... )

I am supposed to have this coming weekend off of work but I decided to pick up some OT on Sunday. It's only five hours and I refuse to work any more than that on that particular day (it's chely's birthday after all). I could really use the money right now. Chad and I are halfway through booking our Vegas trip. We have our UFC expo tickets and our ( Read more... )

It has been a long time. Several things of significance have happened and a whole lot of things that mean absolutely nothing have happened as well ( Read more... )

Chad will be here in less than a week. He's visiting.

A visit is what I requested and it's better than nothing. It just sounded good. Spur of the moment. We're going to Vegas on the 19th and 20th and I'm just planning on having fun with him. I hope my moodiness and bitchiness is non existent. I also hope I won't get sick while he's here. My ear has ( Read more... )

i feel better than i did yesterday...i feel better than i did 20 mins ago ( Read more... )

Trying to save up for my vacation stinks. There's not enough money my bank account. Paying bills hurts my heart ( Read more... )

Stop saying I'm pushing you away and just admit you've already been long gone.

He stoped loving me last year and I've been in denial ever sense.

I'm the loneliest i've ever been. With (last fall) and without him (now).

last moth was altogether bad for me. the stress at work, the bullshit at home, the self loathing within me. it was awful ( Read more... )