Glad to see that my page settings are still the same.

I remember having to learn HTML to change anything.

i forget how to love. i forget how to be soft to someone, if i ever was. i can't even imagine myself writing little notes to someone or even thinking about them throughout the day. i don't even know if i'm capable of doing that anymore.

i've been told i'm hard to love

i've been told by someone that they are starting to hate me

i must bring out the worst in people

i am going to UFC 200 tonight alone. i literally have no one to go with.

working with these troubled kids would be a lot easier if i had a support system in my personal life. getting doors slammed in my face or being completely ignored wouldn't be so hard. it takes everything to not show you're affected, because then the kid feels like they've won. but it's hard to go home and not have a real person to being you back

i forget what being in a relationship feels like. i forget what it feels like to show my affection to someone. i worry that if i find someone, i'll forget what to do

i need a relationship, not a house

i miss being in love. i miss cuddling on the couch. i miss being told i'm loved.

i will never find the same depth of love as i once had - given and received. but mostly received