If I was going to name a band after myself, I would call it The Jaime Montiel Problem.

[mmmrorschach]

There's a street in my neighborhood named Arrowwood, but the 'd' is almost scratched off so it looks like Arrowwoo, and every time I see it I laugh because it looks like they finally started letting dogs name streets.

This is my favorite rule in baseball (with the possible exception of the beer rule7.08(i): "Any runner is out when, after he has

Comments

[keraxx]

Hahah that dream sounds oddly awesome. Mine are generally lame when I'm lucky enough to have them.

I can't let my feet or hands stick out from the blanket when I'm in bed. I worry something will grab them!

[mmmrorschach]

Most of my dreams I forget as I'm brushing my teeth and get all the way awake. They're not very remarkable. But I know that too many of my dreams feature a lot of misplaced anxiety. Like, if a monster is chasing me in my dreams, I'm more worried that somebody might be watching me being chased, so I'll kind of just fast-walk so people don't think I'm running in mortal fear of my life, that I'm just in a hurry fellas and totally not panicking. So if you ever see me power walking in real life, you can help by not staring so I can take off and start sprinting

[mmmrorschach]

Oh, but when infiltrating a secret underground government base, having a panic attack is the fastest way to blow your cover. When they show you the numbing agent they coat dollar bills with or the remote sonic bullet detonator, you're just supposed to nod your head and quietly back out of the room before someone flashes the cabalistic tattoo on the underside of the wrist as they approach you for the secret handshake.

My Sleep Position Interpretation Guide says that you are "a free spirit who appreciates security."

[mmmrorschach]

It says that "I practice a habitual economy of effort". Gosh, that's the nicest way I've ever been called lazy before.

[waitingonsunday]

That is a band I would absolutely listen to. That is not a theme park I think I'd like to play at.

I just laughed so hard at the dog street sign that people in my office were asking what was so funny. I can't explain, guys, just move on.

There's this whole Lifetime Movie Network backstory to my dad's childhood and he grew up never knowing his mother or that he had more than two siblings. The summer before I started third grade, we flew to Indiana to meet his family for the first time. There was one hell of a reunion and a reporter was there from the local paper. There were pictures with the write-up and I was in the background of one of them. I had been avoiding the cameramen, but I was excited all the same. When I moved to town a few years later, I remember telling people, "I've been in the paper here before!" like anyone cared, haha.

I don't like sleeping with anything hanging off the bed. Something under the bed could get me! Or my cat could come in silently and rub against my hand in the middle of the night and give me a heart

[mmmrorschach]

And whenever anyone asks, "Why does this band suck so much," I can kind of just shrug and gesture towards the name. And theme park might have been the wrong word. It really had more a science museum vibe to it.

I have a shirt from a family reunion I didn't get to attend. The attendee list on the back is the only documentation I have of how big my family is. I can just imagine the family mothers gathered together and counting on their fingers all the people they need to include on the shirt, and one of them saying, "And Jaime! Don't forget Jaime!" and it warms my heart a little.

Sleeping along a perfectly flat surface is fine most nights, but you really should try sleeping IN THE THIRD DIMENSION one of these days, even though that's where all the monsters live.

[grrgoyl]

I don't know much about baseball, but I'd like to apply your "travesty" rule to politics, because what's going on in Washington for 4-1/2 years now can only be described as one.

I'm not opposed to hanging limbs off my bed (though I don't think I actually do it). My only bed rule is I can't sleep with socks on. I've tried on very cold nights, and it's no good -- my feet feel smothered.

Haha, I liked your power walking comment to keraxx re: worrying that people may notice that you're running in mortal fear of your life. Brains are weird.

[mmmrorschach]

And instead of "confusing the defense", they're confusing the populace. There should be an umpire who emphatically does the "You're Out" punch when a politician starts backpedaling. And I hope we can work in the finger-twirling home run signal, too.

It's the time of year when I've started shedding my socks before going to bed, but I really wish there was a degree of transition between 'socks' and 'no socks', a happy medium. Wearing a sock on only one foot and switching every so often is not a practical option.