and just like that....poof...she's gone. tonight was the night for me to tell her how i felt and not be sad. i did tell her how i feel. i told her that i liked her a whole lot, but i shouldn't. of course she asked why. i told her that it's me chasing after something i can never have. i never really opened up to her like that before. so what ( Read more... )

im such a fuck up. if i wouldnt have opened my mouth things would still be the same. i hate my emotions.

well my friends are all starting to go back to college already which leaves me here by my self. i complain too much. i miss people way too much. i dont have any ideas for movies what so ever. i wanna try to write a script but its kinda hard without any ideas. i keep having these random dreams with all these people i havent seen in a long time ( Read more... )

i miss people way to much. why cant i just get her off my mind? even for a second. rachel doesnt even know how much i miss her. the party will kinda be a downer but hopefully she'll be coming back soon. january, go by fast so i can see her again.

::dusts off cobwebs:: hmmm...i think i will randomly write in here. i hope no one reads this. lol i haven't write in here in freakin ever. i checked and the last time i updated was on my birfday. that's interesting. A LOT has happened since then...i don't think i'm even gonna get into it. it's just a lot of bull shit but also mixed with ( Read more... )

so todays my bday. exciting stuff. im 18 now. i can buy porn, cigarettes, lottery tickets and be tried as an adult in court. cant wait to do all those things. margie slept over last night for her birthday. it was fun and enjoyable as always!!! ;-) then this morning my mom took us to IHOP (international house of pancakes) for breakfast. i ( Read more... )

today was weird....it just really sucked. ive just been in a really weird mood where i just wanted to die and that no one would care (im sure no one would cept for like 1) but yeah thats how i feel today. i was kinda like this yesterday but today was worse. i really dont wanna go to the dentist. maybe i can just overdose on tylenol and not wake ( Read more... )

I'm supposed to be cleaning. I haven't cleaned that much yet. I prolly should do that soon. My mom said that if I don't clean my rooms then I can't have a party. Tomorrow I have a dentist appointment. ::someone shoot me:: I hate the dentist. All he does is lecture me on flossing. Thursday is the party for Margie and Lexi. That should be fun ( Read more... )

This week wasn't all that bad. Tuesday I slept over at Margie's house. Wednesday we went to the mall and I got Tony Hawk 3 so I've been playing that more than I should. Thursday was weird. I know that I set my alarm. So I hear my mom calling my name. I get up and it's NOON. I felt bad cuz I missed walking with Sara but it was prolly for the ( Read more... )

event....i have to write an event. my day wasnt too eventful except for the fact i ate obese amounts of food. i had a banana and water for breakfast, cheese & crackers (i can never turn down cheese and crackers) with root beer, salad, cheese ravioli, garlic bread, ice cream, and popcorn. i feel fat. i gotta walk a lot tomorrow. sorry sara cuz ( Read more... )