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I feel empty. Would anyone even notice? I thought I was getting better and tonight I realized I am definitely not. I don't know what I'm going to do when he's gone. I don't know if I remember life without him. And as strong and independent as I pretend to be, I don't know if I'll be able to do it.
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I am once again in love with a best friend that has no feelings for me. Twice in my life now. I would give my entire heart and the rest of my life to him if he asked. I had to watch him flirt with and be infatuated with another woman tonight. I feel ridiculous and giddy and overwhelmingly empty. What has happened to me.
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I haven't been on here in awhile
If I had the money to buy a gun, I world. I feel like it's pretty bad that most of the time I get drunk I think about killing myself. But what can you do when you're in love with your best friend, for the second time in your life, and they don't recognize you as anything other than a good friend that will fade over time? -
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please
I just need to talk to someone
I used to have so many people
what happened
I just need one person
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Only a matter of hours after I posted that tweet and a two minute conversation revealing a potentially fatal relationship flaw now makes me feel trapped. I seriously have nothing to look forward to that doesn't involve this relationship. I don't know how to continue my life without this in my plans. And now, in the early hours of Christmas Eve, we ( Read more... ) -
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Those nights where you have no idea what the fuck happened, but your relationship could suddenly fall apart at the wrong touch/word.
Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.
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Stacey and Derek are my last hope. If they too forget about me, I'm going to go crazy.
It's going to happen when I move to Wheeling. If I weren't in love with Derek, I would probably break up with him just because the thought of this move terrifies me. But at the same time, staying in this town while everyone I know moves away terrifies me, too.
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No one is online, but after actually going to my school's psychiatric center multiple times, I know they won't help. I don't know what's wrong, but I know I desperately need help. I don't know how to tell Derek this. It's nowhere near his fault, he just doesn't know how to help. I don't know what to do... :(
Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.
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Why can't anyone just fucking AGREE with me?!? I complain about a book to my boyfriend, he argues the author's side and argues against everything I say even though he's never read the book. I complain about what my boyfriend just did, they say, "Well, he likes to play Devil's Advocate. What can you do?" I'm going to scream at the next person that ( Read more... )