-join peace corps ( Read more... )

goddammit. get the hell out of my head.

so. its really over.

im sad. and confused. troubled little girl. walk among the normal people. curious observer. faucet that wont turn off. welling up, flowing down, ocean of salty hurt. the umbilical cord of my hearts been severed since its birth and never fully healed. it floats around aimlessly, seeking connection, nourishment. like the little bird that couldnt ( Read more... )

so, i found this catchprase that instantly makes me feel better in a sick, morbid kind of way: "if you were gonna die tomorrow, what would you do today?" i had that thought, and snap, i found it again, just like that. found what? that thing, that strange thing that i lost for a long while and couldnt find again. hope. happiness. the ability ( Read more... )

i just got this email about some lj reply to one of my posts. and i was like, wtf, i dont recognize this post. it was something i had written in 2003, it turns out, under a different name that i forgot i created. and when i went back there were only two posts under that name. it was before i even started feelin for anyone. i forgot how fucked ( Read more... )

God, I feel like hell tonight ( Read more... )

dude, i am going straight to hell. im such an evil person. stupid, too. but, what the fuck ever. thats life, right? who really gives a damn about me anyway?

i just reread my last few journal entries. im fuckin stupid. talk about a cycle of a ratrace. eh, hopefully we'll break the cycle here on out. here's to hopin for miracles. but its the holiday season, so why not?