It sucks to be alone this time of year but it sucks worse to be alone in a crowd.

Don't think anyone reads these anymore. Everyone is on facebook these days so I can write anything and no one will see it...not a bad deal. I've been RIFed (Reduction in Force) ie laid off. After over thirty years with the school system you think they'd let me work my 30 years. But no, they have to let me go now with one year left. Well, it ( Read more... )

It's been awhile since I've written anything--still adjusting to my new "life". The new house is coming along but I still miss the old one--especially this time of year when everything there is in bloom and there is nothing at this place that blooms. I don't mind living alone but sometime the loneliness gets to me--but not as much as before so it' ( Read more... )

Yesterday was Yom Kippur. I usually use the day to try and put my life to rights and start in the right directions. I went through my scape book from college and kept a few things including an old Disneyland guide from 1971, a picture of my first car that was totaled and all of the "love letters and cards" Tom sent me or gave me that I had saved ( Read more... )

Major weekend activity. First waited for my Aunt Annie and Uncle Jerry to arrive on Fri. They didn't come and I couldn't reach them by cell. Finally found them on Saturday. They were in Asheville and finally arrived on Sunday late afternoon in Charlotte. Meanwhile, Halley's car HAD to have new tires before she left Charlotte or it wouldn't have ( Read more... )

Had increasing melt downs the last week of July and went my phone message machine didn't work and I couldn't get the information i needed from my doctor I had my first and hopefully last anxiety attack. After several hours, I was able to finally pull myself together and just doubled my antidepressant and took some meds. the doctor gave Halley so I ( Read more... )

For some reason this past week has been very, very hard. I've upped my antidepressant and am starting to feel better...but why now ( Read more... )

Saturday night the Rabbit and I had dinner with Douglas, Crystal and "the boys". Also in attendance were the Rossi's (yea Heather and her parents) and Tom. I did well..didn't cry or anything. It felt a little awkward at first but soon it felt like always, but Sunday was hard. It's the first time he's been back to the house and I almost lost it ( Read more... )

I'm doing surprising well since he moved out. Sometimes I get upset at night or first thing in the morning. It's hard after so many years to sleep alone. I tend to wake up about 2:30 am which is when I always woke up if he hadn't come to bed yet. old habits and feelings die hard I guess. But on the whole, I'm adjusting well. The stress of ( Read more... )

My mother dying when I was 24
Miscarriage at 20 weeks
Having one of my children have a chronic and life threatening medical condition
My husband deciding he has no feelings for me after 38 years and moving out.
Having to totally start my life over at 58.

Life sometimes sucks.