Why is it that everyday im too dependable on people to make myself feel better? i call people all the fucking time for that boost of self esteem. when things go good i feel great. is this just regular depression? or is it something else? I've been living at this amazing house for the last two weeks and trying to get my car running. but was it ( Read more... )

god bless the music that has been created...

especially METAL!!!

including- slipknot, killswitch engage, etc.

feeling like something is missing but cant seem to find an object big enough to fill the void ( Read more... )

i have a month to move out. it fuckin sucks

right now i am just hanging out in boston for the night, who knows what is going to happen. boston is my safe place which is fuckin awsome.for the summer i will be living in bourne, than in september hopefully i will be living in brookline. my car will be all payed for and then i can get collision and glass, when i do eventually move i will park my ( Read more... )

this lie is tearing me up on the inside, wanting to cry but no tears fall. i'm not depressed, just a little sad. being judged, and disappointed by everyone and everything. i know i shouldn't care what other people think but i do and i don't it' s a complicated thing to live by and if i know you well enough than we'll talk about it. but anyway.... ( Read more... )

everything seems to be falling apart with things going on. using self medication by smoking cigarettes and spending time with miss mary. am i drug addict and a drunk? smoking and drinking my problems away because the only other solution is suicide. craving attention wanting to cry but no tears seem to fall down the side of my face.fuck everything. ( Read more... )

for some fucking reason all i feel is emptiness. i no ides why but that is all i feel.

just chillin up in beantown with cdttt and my drummer. mad high right now. everything is going really well with my band "ikaros" things are falling into place and were still getting along together chillin when theres free time. writing new songs just having a good time.

everything is all set to go. or so it may seem. the band i play in (ikaros) seems like things are really starting to come together. we took on a new guitarist who plays a 7 string and just got a new k7 so, jay and jeremy will be playing duel 7 strings in B standard. i cant wait to play another show.aaaahhhh. anyway, our drummer goes to school at ( Read more... )