to fatty fat cakes?? Oh man how I have let my self go. And reeling myself back in seems nearly impossible. Doing opti-fast two years ago was such a mistake, because now my expectations for weightloss/time are completely unrealistic. Not matter how much I seem to work out or how healthy I seem to eat, I can't loose weight fast enough. Which then ( Read more... )

I just feel drained. Empty but emotional as hell. like I could sleep for hours and hours.

since I have made a post, but it had been a while since I have felt this sick feeling of death, hallow out my gut and rise up in my throat, putting pressure on my lungs making it difficult to breath. I had a dream about last night, about the cyatic lips and face, the jaundice eyes with large dialated pupils. I hear the screaming, "what do I do ( Read more... )

That bitch stole my shoes, and I am pretty sure she stole my camera too.

I am so sick of her bs, and what sucks worse, is there is nothing I can do. Because I  won't step to her petty old hag cunt whore level. I know she did something with my brand new $60 shoes that I waited two months for. Last time I checked, shoes don't just get up and walk away, but petty cunt whore room mates can take them to try and piss you off ( Read more... )

It is very cold in here, very lonely in here, and very boring in here.

I want to go home
I want to get a new job
I want to lose some wieght
I want to be 21 already
I want you to want me
I want Darren to get a job
I want to eat lunch
I want to my camera back
I want a romantic dinner with you

How does it feel to want?

you can sleep in your car, but you can't ride your apartment to work.

I know sometimes we argue, and I seem depressed, and then you seem depressed. But I love you so much.

It's like taking a huge step backwards. I need a job with evening hours while I am going to school, and one closer to home. So I am trying and trying so hard, but it seems near impossible. I don't want to end up working at taco bell for less than minimum wage! I am a freaking office professional and a Jane of all trades! I deserve more than minimum ( Read more... )

I feel lost with out that camera. It sounds so silly, but I find myself getting kind of down with out even thinking about it. It's like walking around with a huge void and there is nothing to fill it with. I started dreaming this morning, about taking all kinds of pictures of my friends with it. Then when I woke up I remembered it was gone. I feel ( Read more... )