I thought I could go it alone, but I don't think I can anymore. And that goes for every aspect of my life. I always try to close people out. I say I can take care of myself and make my own decisions and I thought I was fine, but I feel like I'm throwing away opportunities. I don't want to be alone anymore...

...almost ready ( Read more... )

I guess there's a difference between not being happy and being unhappy. I'm not happy. But I'm not unhappy. I'm blah. My life is always blah. It's become a blur of going into the lab, coming home, stuffing my face, and going to bed. I've exercised some, but not nearly enough, and I feel like a huge ball of waste. I don't DO anything!! And on top of ( Read more... )

what a weird, long, day...for most of today I was an emotional wreck, it was so weird. Then I had some coffee and ran for a bit and now I'm fine. OMG. Let's hope that doesn't happen again ( Read more... )

::sigh ( Read more... )

I've decided that I dwell on the past too much. Well, maybe dwell isn't the right word, but I think about it a lot and I think about who I was and compare it to who I think I am now...blah blah. I was driving home from work today (in my mother's car, mine is still getting fixed) and I saw a group of kids in a car, still sporting the "Seniors '06 ( Read more... )

This SUCKS. I didn't have time to stop and get coffee this morning. Now I am literally dying. I don't feel like myself, and I just...I just want to die. Or stop for some coffee on the way home. I just realized that I have to go through Westborough anyway to pick up pictures I took at the car accident scene, so I could go to Starbucks. Now I feel ( Read more... )

so I'm at work, and I so don't want to be here right now. I woke up really looking forward to going in to work and I was all happy and stuff, and then I got in a car accident. That's right...I crashed my new car-haven't even had it for a month. SO what happened was I was behind a minivan who was behind a camry that stopped wicked short to turn ( Read more... )

OK...so I'm feeling better about things now. Maybe it was just that time of the month, I don't know. I just have to realize that there will be ups and downs with everything. But no matter what happens, right here, right now, I am happy with where I am. Not just with my job either, but about everything. These past few weeks have been a time of ( Read more... )

weird couple of days...yesterday, we finally sold the Saturn. I'm finally rid of that beast. Although I wasn't entirely happy about it. When I saw the new owners driving off with it, I felt this unexpected emotion about it. It was my first car, a lot happened in there-driving to and from my first job, driving around with friends after midnight ( Read more... )