WHAT an unproductive, worthless day this has been. I have done nothing at all of any merit whatsoever. Hoping a journal entry might remedy the situation (but I doubt it). I am sooooo sleepy and unable to think straight. My nose has been running all day. I am achy and dull and I might be sick but maybe not--despite all these physical complaints, I  ( Read more... )

Not much to type here today. It's a Monday. I have struggled all day to do one freaking task here at work, and I have failed to finish even that.

Normally I would not bother posting here, except that I am verrrry happy and hopeful about two things that happened over the weekend:

One, I worked out both Saturday and Sunday, to Leslie Sansone's ( Read more... )

I am not impressed with the new year, and it's barely an hour old. In fact, I am too fucking pissed off and frustrated and upset to even go to bed. I want to break things and scream at the top of my lungs. I want to throw my dog and cat and husband out into the cold January night and I want them all to fucking freeze to death. I have a killer ( Read more... )

I am glad to be putting 2010 behind me, even though there were a few bright spots. The dark spots, unfortunately, were much, much darker.

Let's start with the darkest spot of all. On Aug. 17th, I lost my sweet baby boy Floyd. I have been on this planet 49 years and this was by far the worst day ever, as were many, many of the days that preceded and ( Read more... )

Okay, so I am 11 weeks out from an open RNY, and I have lost 48 pounds. I have about 40 pounds to go until I am at goal. If I hew to the BMI tables, I am no longer obese, just overweight ( Read more... )

My dearest Rafael,

You are the sweetest, most loving little puppy I've ever met. You are, in so many ways, the answer to my dreams and the perfect balm to heal my broken heart. I look into those big warm brown eyes and I just melt. I can't refuse you anything. I can't raise my voice. I can't correct you.

But honey, I am going to ruin you if this ( Read more... )

My life is so different now. Of course, change is what I wanted, right? I didn't want to keep stuffing myself with junk food and getting sicker and sicker. I didn't want to keep taking diabetes meds and suffering the consequences. I didn't want to be a fat slug anymore. I didn't want to be without a dog in my life. I didn't want to feel like a ( Read more... )

I weigh myself on Wednesdays.Wednesdays are the day I have my post-op support group meetings, and any other scheduled appointments at the bariatric clinic are always on Wednesdays. So, it just seems like a good day for a weigh-in.

So, it was five weeks ago yesterday that I had the surgery. I lost 17 pounds the FIRST WEEK.

This week, I lost TWO  ( Read more... )

Life after wls continues to be an interesting journey.

Today I wore a pair of misses' size 16 jeans. No, no elastic waist or stretch denim, no "W" after the number 16. I didn't buy them at Lane Bryant or the plus section of any department store. They are Lands End "modern fit" size 16 jeans.

Today I also wore this fabulous shirt that I bought oh ( Read more... )

I've been home on sick leave for three weeks now, and Mark and I are just plain sick of each other.

He has his daily routines, and I feel like I am in the way. He doesn't want me to do anything. I can't fix his meals, I can't do the laundry, I can't take out the trash or vacuum... I tried emptying the dishwasher tonight and he barged into the ( Read more... )