Another year wrapping up. It seems like yesterday I was writting about what 2005 was to me. Oh gawd. How was this one different? I think that this year was one of rebuilding, from the scraps of me I started off with at the beginning of it. How tall have I rebuilt my tower? Is it an inch higher than it was, or a foot? I hope for at least a foot. Is ( Read more... )

Lots of stuff on my mind the past week or so. Plenty of new facts to face, and I guess I'm just trying to grasp it all, see how this idea feels, play with this decision, in the hopes of coming to conclusions. I have to find a place to live for July. And all that encompasses.... finances, comfort, what do I prefer to have more of, living alone for ( Read more... )

It seems that I am used as a doormat pretty often. Not just by anyone, but by the 'men' in my life. All of them, without exception, all my 'guy friends'. Not my girlfriends. I didnt go to work today. I didnt feel like it. I got a bit panicky today, that when finally things are going good again for me (ie i am FEELING good), that they would start ( Read more... )

The other night I couldn't get to sleep until the wee hours of the morning. One of the things on my mind was my Nana, in a certain moment I missed her intensly, and yearned to feel her close to me, as she was, when I was a little girl. I turned on my bedside light and had to let it all out on paper as I felt it. It came out sort of like an ode ( Read more... )

I haven't been writting anything much the past month. How true it seems to be for me that I can't seem to get inspiration when I am on the up side of things. Inspiration through tragedy seems to be my forte. I'd like it to be otherwise, both-wise, clock-wise ( Read more... )

The holidays have come and gone. A new year has begun. I don't look back at the year gone by in terms of my accomplishments and failures, I just look back at it and form a general opinion of it all. It's my birthdays that cause me to self-reflect on the other things, the things I accomplished, failed to, want to change for the next, etc. 2005? It ( Read more... )

I went to Cuba for 7 days ( Read more... )

I went to bed over 2 hours ago. I couldn't sleep. But I couldn't move either. I am so burned out after being awake for 5 minutes these days. I felt my stomach growling, reminding me that I hadn't eaten anything since lunch. And no way was I going to sleep until I ate something either ( Read more... )

"The only person you are guaranteed to be with until the day you die is yourself." I quote. Someone told me that at some point, I don't remember who. I wish I did. Or maybe I read it somewhere... The past couple of months are quite a blur, as those who know me know my short-term memory is shit lately. But it's getting quite better. I think it is ( Read more... )

I had an hour long conversation with a friend of mine Vic who recently moved to L.A. Well, he did most of the talking, and I interjected when need be, to offer opinion and needed support for what he was going through, which I know is all he needed in that moment. He has always been very comfortable talking to me about what is going on in his head ( Read more... )