Yesterday consisted of many things... one was remembering Leah and feeling other people's pain. I went to a funeral yesterday. My friend's mom died. It was a beautiful funeral, and though I didn't know her, I still cried. I missed Leah, and for the first time, I really felt like she was actually dead. But the best part of my day actually came ( Read more... )

It's funny how books can stir up not only your imagination but also your emotions. I'm a little embarrassed to say this, but I have become engrossed in the Twilight Series. I saw the movie first actually, and wasn't completely impressed. I thought it was okay but it didn't leave me feeling amazed. Kristen bought me all 4 books for Christmas, so I ( Read more... )

It's funny how you realize things in an odd sort of way sometimes, like when you are sitting in the bathtub or when you are staring at rain falling fast out the window. Texas brought me a change and a lot of realization ( Read more... )

I really don't know how much more bull shit I can take from people. I'll admit that I've done my share of hurting people... maybe more than my fair share. But this is INSANE. Jesse was lying to me the whole time I was dating him. How could he lie to me when my sister was on that cold white table DYING?! I guess it doesn't matter any more since I ( Read more... )

Everyone says that it will get better. But it isn't getting any better ( Read more... )

I find that I am actually enjoying my job lately. Since Sarah left, I don't have to put up with constant belching, screaming, cussing, or anything that you can possibly relate to all that. Also, I am really enjoying learning how to close loans and am extremely excited to close my first one on Friday. I like being busy at work. Not only does it make ( Read more... )

To pick up where I left off, Jason took me out to eat on Wednesday because the office had been so hectic. We had all been extremely ill and it was very easy to take it out on each other. Ryan eventually came over that night and told me that he missed me more now than he did when we were apart completely. He said that it hurts him to know that I won ( Read more... )

So, after work, Kristen and I went to the gym. We didn't do an extremely hard workout, but I did sweat, so that's good. Afterward, we went home, showered and got extremely dressed up for "The Messiah." I think that I looked hot. But that is just my opinion. "The Messiah" was beautiful. I was really impressed with the quality of the music and had no ( Read more... )

It is so dreary outside. The storm clouds are gathering and the wind is intoxicatingly blowing around in circles. It is supposed to storm tonight... and it most assuredly feels like it ( Read more... )

And so yesterday, I did the only noble thing I could do. I broke up with Jesse. It was hard. He was so nice to me, even while I was breaking his heart. He said that he knew that I needed some space, and that if I ever decided that I wanted him in my life, to let him know. I felt like dirt afterward. And I should feel like dirt. I just dumped the ( Read more... )