i dont know how to feel anymore i find myself forgetting then i remember and i get mad at myself for forgetting.  i dont know what to do should i just let go or should i hold on to the feeling of uncertainty.  im scared to let my guard down and allow things to get out of control.  i know none of this is my fault but i still feel like i could have ( Read more... )

i never really realise how bad i am at expressing my feelings.  i guess i never really had anyone who cared to much what i thought to even noticed that i wasnt expressing my true feelings at all.  its really hard to express how i feel towards pj because im afraid what i have to say will hurt him so i just dont say anything at all.  i wish i had ( Read more... )

I'm going to the cape this weekend and i can't wait.  I;m going with pj and his family.  it will be nice to get away with him for a few days.  the two of us relaxing on the beach together will be amazing.  ill write back about how amazing it went. 

so pretty much my life has completely changed.  i turned 21 and well although i now can walk into a liquor store its really not what changed me.  i guess in a way i can saw reading twilight changed me but not in the way that it seemed to change everyone else.  i don't sit around wondering when my edward is going to arrive because honestly i have ( Read more... )

so i cant sleep so i figured id write in this.  ive got three more finals then im done with this fucking year.  its been rough lately.  originally i had decided to commute to school next year but have recently changed my mind.  i first decided to commute cuz i was suppose to room with sarah who i found out is insane.  i cant deal with another ( Read more... )

the past week has been so rough...its never good seeing the person u love so depressed but its even worse feeling when u are there by there side all week and they dont talk to u at all....i guess i just had this image of him running to me and telling me everything that was bothering him...so on friday i was asked to work but i told them no because ( Read more... )

So I havent updated in a while ive been busy with dance and school and spending time with pj.  last week was probably the most fun ive had here at this god awful school.  on tues we went out to get free pancakes at ihop in worchester.....sadly it was a huge wait so we went to taco bell in the same parking lot instead. later that night we decided ( Read more... )

so i pretty much never write on this thing, i guess i just figure whats the point if no one reads it but ive come to realize its a good outlet for me to let things out and i can look back on things.  i feel like my life is moving so fast sometimes.  im already on my second semester of my third one more year to go.  its crazy.  pj and i have just ( Read more... )

so i just got board and decided ill update for a bit.  im in my third year of school and i love it.  im finally taking my concentration accounting class its hard but i enjoy it anyways.  i get alot of homework but i get it all done and i still dance which i love more than anything.  right now im doing soccer but i think it ends this week.  i spend ( Read more... )

so ive always wanted to go to bryant and i plan on applying there this summer but i know its a tough school to get into and its alot of money...last nite pj made me realize that i should look up other business schools because i know that i deff dont want to stay here at fsc but i dont want to just transfer to another state school i want a business ( Read more... )