Giving birth while he is deployed..

[emmy_lou_who373]

I have a question.. Is it possible to have your husband home for the birth of your child when he is deployed? I have heard that the navy has to give them 3 weeks around the due date.. I'm 21, this is our first child and honestly I'd rather have him there for me.. I don't want to go thru labor alone.. I'm scared to death.. If you guys know anything

Comments

[jay_m_elle]

Generally, if your pregnancy is normal and you and the baby are both healthy, they won't send him home.

One thing I do know of for sure is that new dads are the first ones off of the ship when they arrive back into port.

Check with your command ombudsman. Different commands may have different programs- while the chances are slim that they'll fly him home (it's expensive to do and if you're healthy, they are far less likely to even entertain the thought), they may be able to arrange for him to be on the phone with you while you're in the delivery room, etc.

Hang in there.

[emmy_lou_who373]

well I started having back problems early on..They have me on muscle relaxers as needed bc i'm allergic to the only pain meds they can give me..I can't lift anything at all and am limited when it comes to other things..They say my back will only get worse as the baby gets bigger (the pull on my lower back will be stronger) and the increase in the size of other things doesn't help my upper back.. I'm living with my family back home just in case.. I tried taking care of myself while he was getting ready to deploy and it didn't work so well...idk if they would consider that important or not..

[jay_m_elle]

Honestly, that's up to your doctor and his command. Give your ombudsman or family support group president a call and ask what they think- they'll be able to point you in the right direction, since every command and situation is different.

[rachel3]

Almost always no they won't send them home unless there is something life threatening for you or the baby. Sometimes you get lucky but most of the time they won't send them home especially during a deployment.

[eaglewife126]

it's possible, but not likely.
and they don't HAVE to do anything. they don't have to give him a saingle day off if they choose. (for sailors who are at home...) new dad's are eligible to take up to 10 days of paternity leave that does not count against them...just free days off, but that is up to each command on whether or not they will get that. and that can be taken any time in the child;s first year. so even if he does not get to come home for the birth, he can take his 10 days when he returns from the deployment.
good luck. :)

[xsongsaboutrain]

awww...I can't in any way answer your question because I'm really new to this but if you need someone to talk to about the baby crazies with an absent husband, drop me a line. My husband went to basic less than two weeks after our daughter was born so we were fortunate enough to have him witness the birth, but I could write a book now on how to get through the newborn stage alone.

[kalani1285]

Do you have a civilian doctor, or do you go to the OB/GYN on base? If you have legitimate (I say legitimate because opinions vary by doctors/commands) and your doctor can verify that you need the assistance, the doctor can send your husband a message via the Red Cross. Let me tell you..the Red Cross is a pain in the butt to use, they're very particular, and will verify EVERYTHING with your doctor, so don't try to over-exaggerate anything (haha). Usually doctors on a military treatment facility will not Red Cross, but civilian doctors are more lenient. Then the Red Cross will send the message to your husband and his command wherever he's deployed, and it's still up to the command to send him home for the birth