i'm so tired of being here ( Read more... )

actully had a good day at work today dispite thinking about leana. i came to some strange revilation. all i though in my mind is that she could be a life long friend. i mean it still hurts to think of her but its really not that much there anymore. so i have to ask jen if i can talk to her and see where that goes.

god today at work was horrable. i couldn't take it again. she set up shop in my mind and she wouldn't go away. i'm ok now i've got a handle on it but shit there is just too much to tell and i guess i'm just not depressed enough to tell it all, but here it goes. just like before it hurts to think of leanna with anyone else but me. but its never ( Read more... )

Bah too much to think about and so little time to be upset about it all. But my heart is damn sure trying hard enough to make me upset all it can. Honestly i'm getting tired of finding so many good reason for things to be so bad all the time. I have so many regrets too. God so many. Though most of them believe it or not involve women. Though of all ( Read more... )

just got off the phone with amanda. we couldn't talk long she was going to the fair but i thought i would be able to talk longer then i could but i couldn't think of anything interesting. i wanted to call her back but she is going to work as soon as she gets home. i though i would have a little longer to talk to her but alass she had to go because ( Read more... )

So much to tell and all the time in the world at the moment to tell it. i got fired from my job what... 2 days ago i think it is. i felt horrable it was my fault. i missed too many damn lunch breaks. everything was starting to look up too. but at least still get to go to martial arts at the moment. i cried so hard i think i was just forcing it ( Read more... )

This is my first entry. my life on here begins today.