ThingsI never thought I'd say... Pt. 1

[neocatholic3000]

Anthony! Stop spitting water on the squirrel!

Comments

[sharonbay]

Squirrels are the cuter versions of rats. They carry just as many diseases, fleas, and infestations as their seedier rodent cousins.

Just because they are fluffy doesn't make then less filthy.

Spit on, Anthony. Spit on.

[sharonbay]

See why punctuation makes all the difference. For a moment, I might have been advocating a different thing.

P.S.

[neocatholic3000]

Eats, Shoots, and Leaves :)

Wait, the full story gets better...

[neocatholic3000]

You see, he has been FEEDING said squirrel (he swears he can tell the difference), for 2 years now. He says that this is the same one that follows him to the laundry room.

Said squirrel waits for him by the back patio, and Anthony throws peanuts at it. I get upset when Msr. Squirrel buries peanut shells in my basil. Msr. Squirrel gets fairly aggressive, sometimes climbing the patio screen. The cats are not amused. The squirrel does not care. But since Tony thinks the bugger will comeinto the house (and rightly so), if the squirrel and the cat are in a patio screen faceoff, he opens the window to throw peanuts at the squirrel.

Msr. Squirrel is now catching on to this, and goes to the window screen.

Hence the spitting to get the squirrel away from the window.

So that Tony can open it up.

And feed it peanuts.

He is co-dependent... with a squirrel...

But he doesn't want me to get any more rats, because they don't live long enough.

*SOB*

[sparrowskit]

Oh, god. We fed the squirrel peanuts. Once. When they started trying to get into the house and jumping on and cling to our screen windows whenever they saw us, we started shooting at them instead. >.>;