I'm Never Fucking Again

[nightcookie]

I finally cleaned out my car *throws confette**horay*. I washed it, though it's still fucking dirty, cuz the friggin car wash wasn't powerful enough! I used like $5.00 for all that, cuz I'm, uh, slow. I got home, touched my shiny masterpiece, and it had a nice little trail of dirt right in the middle of my car. Not to mention I used high powered

Comments

[_haloinreverse_]

I wish I could see pics of you! I miss you.

[nightcookie]

Oh My God, I miss you too!! I'll get a picture up, ??soon?? AKA whenever I lose enough to actually put my ugly face on the web. How are you doin? *hugs*

[_haloinreverse_]

Well, I'm not bad, I'm a fatass again, and I'm slowly losing the fat. It's kind of funny. I eat what looks normal everyday, but it's not close to 1000 calories. Nuts.

[anonymous]

He. It takes nothing like a good scare to realize how much you want to live. Keep pushing anorexia until you reach that point. How scared will you be when you realize that there is no going back?
Well, we'll see soon enough.

Oh, and by the way, if you make a public journal, public will read it.

Just another bitch.

[nightcookie]

Anorexia doesn't scare me, it's just a little bit of self torture with a cherry on top. I could stop if I rrreeeaaalllyyy wanted to, but I don't want to AT ALL. I admit, it would be a very hard thing for me to do, but I like it this way for now, so this is how it's gonna be, but without a few other dangers which were on the side. The funny thing is, I totally forgot that I could make some of my entries friends only, thanks for reminding me, for reals ;)

[anonymous]

Girl....I just came across your web site and I have no clue or recollection as to how. I scanned through it finding you saying you need pot, coke, drugs shit. I see your picture and you are beautiful. You are beautiful skinny, as to the drug part I can't really judge just because I have given in only to a few times, but I am not sure what to say to you. You are put on this world for a specific reason and please don't hurt yourself. Take a look back, sit back, sure smoke a joint if you have to, but just look back and look at your life! Dont carry a fucking razor blade with you everywhere. You do NOT need to hurt yourself. You don't want to be skin and bones, sure skinny is good but the 2 digits at your height isnt reasonable. You have such a low self esteem and you need to think and look at what all you have in life. People are starving, and why? Because they have no other choice. People do drugs, cuz they are either in pain, have some emotional problem, or what truely it is..is that simply u just want to get high. GROW UP please....I

[nightcookie]

Thanks for caring. I'm glad SOMEONE does *thinking about home*. To begin with that's not my picture. I wish it was. That was Marya Hornbacher's picture. She wrote a book called, Wasted. It is the best book ever and I totally envy that woman. I replaced the photo and made a crappy little icon using using the first sentence that came to mind, which would describe my life. As you can now see, it fits rather well. I should have wrote wasted instead or life's a bitch, oh well...I've stopped doing drugs on a daily basis, maybe even bi-weekly or even less? I've only used pot, only once since 3 months ago. Pot's not addictive, at least not to me personally. You say that people do drugs because they are in pain, have an emotional problem, but I just want to get high? LOL, are you telling me that I'm emotionally stable, not hurting inside? I haven't heard that much lately, not for at least 4 years. Sure the high was great, but it was just a bonis. All I wanted to do was lose weight from meth and then the wonderful escape from my feelings,

[anonymous]

STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP BEAUTIFUL, BELIEVE IN YOURSELF....U CAN DO IT, I WILL PRAY.

[nightcookie]

I don't wana, I'm not beautiful, but thanks for caring :( *hugs*