Is it real.. maybe i wont ever be able to stop.... the pastvtwo weeks maybe i am an alcoholic. peace im out

It seems as though as i am always looking for a stronger high.... possibly i am just recklace. When im not doing drugs or drinking and sometimes when i am, i like to speed. Seriously speed. Someone has brought to my attention before i could hurt someones loved ones. So, ever since then i just speed on country roads when nobody is around. I'll go ( Read more... )

Ok, so here it is.... im gonna have to post some of this in private bc there are some things i just can't have online believe it or not. My life is too unreal, but what i can say is I've figured something out tonight abt my drinking. I don't know how to live without it. I had so many excuses for why i drink i did some contemplating on it bc i ( Read more... )

Im soooo fucking depressed.... my dog got stolen, im a wreck i just drank.a shitload and did dumb things and im suicidal. I know this trend too well tho. Ill wake up n the morning n feel like an ass bc im overreacting not abt my dog but abt the way i handled the situation. I freaked out too much, but all i can picture is my dog suffering and that ( Read more... )

That's how my emotions are lately.... im pretty cool on tthe exterior, I've kept my emotions in check for the most part. Can't even remember the last time i freaked out about something. I did some katamine the other night when i was drunk. I felt so guilty about it the next day and idk why. But, later that night i was ok with it. I use to never ( Read more... )

I think I've finally hit the bottom, without n e thing detramental happening to me.... i just can't do it anymore, i feel like im dying. Im sick as fuck all the time n putts control. Every morning i wake up i don't know what the fuck happened. I have a few flashbacks of the night before throughout the day. But, this morning i woke up with my car on ( Read more... )

I had to get some, a bunch of states banned it, so of course i immediately bought some. This shit is good though, i drink alot and two of them has got me fucked up. Just sitting in my car drinkin n smokin n jammin. I was gonna quit drink, but i can't right now bc there's too many partys n plans but after that i will bc i think i have acute ( Read more... )

Ok, so i go to thee bar.... everynight. All the boys there fight to buy me drinks and win me over. I reall don't get it, but everyone is always in love with me. Last night the boy I've had a crush on for 8 years asked me out and so did the boy that always buys me everything. Then some other guys and this girl i really like bought me drinks. I ( Read more... )

Ugh, i feel so pointless and empty right now. If im not drinking or working, it feels like there's nothing to do but kill time until i am. Back in the day, someone would deff be up right now and i could just go out and kick it. But now everyones either married, in jail, working, or has kids. I litteraly live to work, bc there's nothing else to my ( Read more... )

My two weeks off work was amazing.... i pretty much drank the whole time.... i also got a new phone. The droid 2, which is awesome. But, its not as easy to type on as the blackberry was. This phone is amazing besides that though. I'm Fuckin stressing tonight though. I'll get to that later though.... while i've been Goin out i've met alot of new ( Read more... )