Jesus Christ, so fucking drunk. Never drinking again? Proibably not. Dear God though....

Scene: Standing around a fire after finishing our day land navigation course.

Major Miller: I'll tell you guys something. Bin Ladin is dead. He was probably in a cave somewhere and when the bombs fell they killed him and everyone else in his cave and closed it up so that no one could ever really find him.
{everyone is silent for a moment}
Me: ( Read more... )

As of late I appear to be having a sort of existential dilemma. Not the kind where I externally debate the meaning of existence, but rather a more internal struggle to find meaning and direction in my life. Now, I'm not a big fan of these kinds of posts as you might have gathered from my lack of any personal entries over the recent months, but I ( Read more... )

I just went to the website I use for looking up German words so I can translate this text I've been working on and the most recently updated entry was "hermaphroditic contact." German people are so goddamn weird.

Probably the best time to shoplift in a convenience store is when it's being robbed by someone else at gunpoint.

Goodbye Blue Monday.

I want to start a death metal emo band called Satan's Unicorns. Our first single would be called "The Black Nail Polish Massacre."

I couldn't resist posting this.


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If you're ever alone on Easter, but you still want the fun of being a kid, get really drunk the night before and hide a bunch of eggs. In the morning when you wake up, you'll have no idea where they are. Or why there are a bunch of angry chickens in your house.

If I shoot a deer in the leg and then strangle it, does that count as killing it with my bare hands?