(Untitled)

[notahandbag]

I tried to call Wesker today. He wanted to know how I got his number and why the hell I sounded like a dead man. It was bound to happen eventually. It happens to everyone at some point, doesn't it

Comments

[bare_my_fangs]

What was that about not wanting him to shove his dick in your mouth?

LJ: Do all the drugs

[notahandbag]

Hey Michael, you see this? This is me ignoring the ever-loving fuck out of you because you're being the dick to end all dicks.

LMFAO

[bare_my_fangs]

I'm just trying to make sure I have this straight. Or not straight, since it's you we're talking about.

[notahandbag]

[There's a soft sigh and then...] Hey Michael, you see this? This is me ignoring the ever-loving fuck out of you because you're being the dick to end all dicks. Hey Michael, you see this? This is me ignoring the ever-loving fuck out of you because you're being the dick to end all dicks. Hey Michael, you see this? This is me ignoring the ever-loving fuck out of you because you're being the dick to end all dicks. Hey Michael, you se- [And then the not prerecorded Birkin steps in to say:] By the way that joke wasn't funny and I don't want Wesker's dick in my mouth.

[notahandbag]

Not only am I a fruitcake, I'm also a non-cheating fruitcake. Considering what happened last time, can you blame me?

And is sex really your only viable solution?

[notahandbag]

And I really don't want to know how, either. My loyalty is my one good trait, damn it.

Nope, Stein does not, in fact, have soft breasts to cradle my face as I cry, you are correct in thinking that. Sir.

[notastickwoman]

Don't let him walk all over you like that. I didn't realize that homos had this same problem considering that you're both men, but considering it's a European thing, I'm unsurprised.

[notahandbag]

...Europ- What?

Okay, first off, Wesker's not my boyfriend, he never has been, and I'm pretty sure he's asexual. Secondly, I think he's acting this way because he lost access to the community. Third, if women have problems with men, why wouldn't men have those exact same problems? And no, we don't pick up on them any more than you guys do, I don't think.

[notastickwoman]

I don't really care. I didn't know that they really existed until Smitty said something about it.

[notahandbag]

...What, are gays mystical elves to you or something like that?

[notahandbag]

Hardee-har-har, you jackass. You know that this probably happened because he lost access to the community and not because he's avoiding me.

[notahandbag]

Eh, I don't think I'd like fawning over you as much as I did with him.

[notahandbag]

...It bothers me a bit that your poetic shit has so-far been the most helpful.

Though he's not spurning my attentions, he just left the community. But you raise a good point! I can use this opportunity to say goodbye to my old life and do something new and exciting! Or something.

[imperializing]

My manner of speak, I cannot alter I'm afraid.

Life is continuous, one must press on for themselves. They have that duty to themselves.

[notahandbag]

Don't worry about it. It makes you seem very... Regal.

That's really good advice. I wish I was better at following it. I'm sort of terrible at moving on from the past. But it's worth a shot. Again.