so i kinda stopped using this because i dont like being critized for expressing my feelings. Then i was thinking and i decided let people be bitches thats fine with me. This week has generally been a weird and good week. I keep having strange dreams and waking up in the middle of the night because of them. Because I wake up im super tired in the ( Read more... )

sorry i dont believe in demoralizing myself to be a slut on halloween. sorry im better then that

ive hit rock bottom

so in like a little while its going to be mine and pauls 4 month which makes this the longest relationship that accept to be a relationship Im so happy. like even my friends see im just so much happier being with him. hes just so amazing ( Read more... )

 OK so new paltz in like an hour and a half. wow. Im super excited cause i know being with the girls in our suite will be really fun. The parties, the indepence and just being in such a beutiful place. Im realy excted gabbie is there 2! Im happy about me and paul. I mean every other week might be a long time, but it lets us see eachother and have ( Read more... )

so its that time again. I cry now and get so upset about leaving when in 3 weeks from now i wont be able to imagine being home. This year is so much more though. My parents finally realized im an adult and repremanding me wont work. They started treating my with respesct and giving me suggestions instead of orders. I mean we had our agruements but ( Read more... )

holy  fuck. im 20 tomorrow. this is my last day as a teenager

so the lack of closure in my life is whats bothering me the most. im not so sure how i stand with people and that bothers me. If i knew what i did, or if everything isnt fine or is fine then id be okay, The closure would be there and all would be well. I dont like this guessing game im playing. Im not sure why im not talking to certain people or ( Read more... )

 this week has been a pile of emotions. feeling out of place when im with people who were my best friends, working till i cant work anymore and having a discussion with josh about things. The only stableness is school friends and paul.

 so i tried, but being ingnored the whole time is bullshit. I did something wrong i guess? sorry im taking a class working everyday and have other friends who actually call me to do stuffand someone who actually cares about me for once. You call me once and im busy and thats the end? well if u give up i do to. i showed up today to see if things ( Read more... )