I knew I still had this account somewhere in my subconscious. I've just been seeking more simplicity in life. Or I've chosen not to express anything that goes on inside me. Believe whichever suits your needs and I'll do the same. It seems like I miss something or someplace that never even happenned. I've been daydreaming on the bus on my way to ( Read more... )

I got a present for my 21st birthday. A realization that I am a complete and total fake. Like I have been living in this made-up reality in which I mattered more, and in reality I am just a fucking total loss. Maybe my thinking process is so fictitious that I don't really exist at all. I used to think that the rest of the world was in my ( Read more... )

FUCK MATT! I'm trying like hell to come to terms with the fact that no matter how long I live, this solemn sense of lonliness is never going to feel any different. I feel exactly the same tonight in my empty bedroom as I did when I was fifteen. The more time I spend by myself the more i actually like myself, and the more I dislike society for ( Read more... )

I've been reviewing my friend's updates and it seems as if I've missed out on a lot of interesting things. Dave is in love. So is Marites. Chad (Sean to the uncool) has a great sense of humour (who knew???) and Alex is silly as usual. I'm going to England Thursday morning to see Nine Inch Nails and hang out in London, Manchester, Burnley, and ( Read more... )

Every journal Enty stars with "I".

My sister called me the other day to see if I was at the Danzig concert. I wasn't. She still won't return my calls ( Read more... )

God my house is cold. I shouldn't be complaining because first of all, I am in Florida. But it was so cold walking home that I was looking forward to a warm home. But all I got was a cold dark den filled with the clutter I left last night. I haven't even managed to clean up yet. I had to pour myself a glass of some wine I don't like and play a ( Read more... )

I'm so tired lately. I really have not slept enough this year. I think I'll start anew tonight by going to bed right now. Well, after I see which infomercials are on for a few hours of course.

So it's 1 AM and I just got out of work. The bus driver and I were the only ones on the bus tonight so I started talking to him about bike week traffic. He then proceeded to shift the conversation to something about relationships. How he never married and how happy he is about it. How he has never told a woman that he loves her because "No ( Read more... )

If you woke up, and I was in bed with you, what would be your first thought?