02 - Bigger Than You

[nyanpirenya]

[Action A - Morning, 1649 Albright Lane]

[It started off so simple, in such little ways. When Nyanpire woke up, he had outgrown the pillow he had been sleeping on. He was big enough that his behind was hanging off. How odd

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[bye_to_yer_head]

*That's a ... yep. That's a gigantic cat.

A gigantic singing cat.

.. Sniper is just gonna turn around and go back home. He is obviously not drunk enough for this.*

[nyanpirenya]

[Oh if only Nyanpire knew the delight wonder that he was bringing to everyone's life....

Then maybe he wouldn't have sat down in Sniper's yard to groom himself.]

[bye_to_yer_head]

Th' bloody hell are you doin' on my lawn cat?

*Not that he expects the cat to respond. He's kinda wishing he has his gun on him in case this thing tries tobeat him.*

[nyanpirenya]

Nyaa?

[He stops himself mid-ear-wipe and looks down and around for the little tiny complaining voice.]

I'm washing!

[Which he resumes doing. His ears are clean, so now he's grooming his sides.]

[bye_to_yer_head]

*This marks the first time Sniper has been shorter than something. And it's a kitten.*

I .. can see that. Why're you doin' that on my lawn?

*And why is he talking to a giant cat?*

[nyanpirenya]

[Nyanpire pauses in his grooming once again.]

Cuz this is where I felt all dirty.

[But only briefly. Then back to the washing up! He's a kitten. This entire town exists for his comfort, yes? That's how it works, right? He's doing nothing wrong.]

[bye_to_yer_head]

*Sorry Nyanpire, Sniper is more a dog person.*

.. and since when do cats get this big and talk?

[nyanpirenya]

...I dunnyo.

But I always talk! I'm a smart Nyanpire.

[bye_to_yer_head]

You're a ... what now?

*He's currently trying to edge around the giant cat to get back into his house.*

[nyanpirenya]

Nyanpire! Imma cat, and Imma vampire! Nyanpire♪!

[And this self-centered little unnatural creature does not notice at all that he's in Sniper's way.]

[bye_to_yer_head]

*He grimaces and tries to step over that gigantic tail.*

What's a nyanpire?

[nyanpirenya]

Me! Imma Nyanpire!

[He is at least polite enough not to flick his tail and send the guy flying.]

[bye_to_yer_head]

*Mission: Escape Nyanpire's Tail has been achieved.*

Okay then. How have I never seen a two story talkin' cat walking around before?

[nyanpirenya]

I... I only got this big this morning, nyaa...

[And the tail goes swish! So it can be curled around to be washed!]

[bye_to_yer_head]

*And everything in the near vicinity blows away in the sudden breeze. Sniper just braces himself and glares.*

Maybe you should go back to being little.

*that's totally how it works right?*

[nyanpirenya]

But... but I dunnyo how.

[He shuffles himself around so he's actually facing in the direction of this critical little voice. Have some Giant Kitty blinking at you!]

Do you?