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Florida
Off to visit my family in Florida, this will be the first time since March 26th, that Scott and I will spend a 24+ hour period away from each other. I'm sad about him not bring able to come with me, but I'm happy to see everyone too.
Posted via LiveJournal app for Android.
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frustrated
It's terrible to be happy and sad all at the same damn time. I'm in such a pathetic state right now, is making me crazy. Still though, I'm happy, I'm in love with Scott, and presently I just want all of his attention... I feel greedy, but I also feel a little like I'm possibly smothering him. I'm really trying not to. I just am overwhelmed with my ( Read more... ) -
Yearly update?
Looking back over the last 10 years of my life, essentially life since graduation: I have evolved (perhaps De-evolved) into another standard statistic in America. I'm a non-divorced, yet separated, parent, with more than 1 father of my girls. I've not completed college, I've worked jobs that I used to say; I never would. I don't have government ( Read more... ) -
Sharing the journal
Recently I've decided to share my journal with those that I hid it from the most, my family and more friends. I hope they all realize that nothing is intentionally here to upset them or cause any long term grudges between us. Every time I sought out help for my bi-polar disorder they always said one thing... don't bottle anything up. LJ Has been my ( Read more... ) -
Wow long time no updates!
I moved back in June and haven't had internet at home since. This is starting to get crazy lol. I can't stand to think that we're gonna bemoving again in just a couple months! I told James we're getting net service when we get to our new place. We've both been going absolutely batty without it. he's been having to use his parents computer to ( Read more... ) -
questions questions uncertainty
I'm terrified, alone, and helpless, I can't express the things that have gone on, what happened, and what is to come... I have no way of fathoming the next step. I need help, I hate him, I hate myself.... If it weren't for my children, I wish the sun wouldn't rise ever again. He's killing me, and I'm letting him. I DID try to escape. I failed... I ( Read more... ) -
headache
My mouth feels like it's full of that latexy dental moulding stuff ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
trapped...
i lied to get away and it didn't work...
plotting... to break his heart
i need out cause i'm broken -
O.o
My 2nd anniversary with James is coming up.
Is he THE ONE? No idea... but we've been pushing each other away lately, it's kinda weird.
Because only a few months ago I wanted to leave and part of me still says it's the right thing to do, and another part of me would truly miss him because I do love him but I'm not IN love anymore.
I know I know I'm a ( Read more... ) -
Ahoy
Things aren't great. I'd like to say so, but it's just not true. Things probably aren't as bad as I'm about to claim either ( Read more... )