*sigh*

Post from mobile portal m.livejournal.com

Note to self: you can't change the past and you can't control everything. Just. Let. Go.

Post from mobile portal m.livejournal.com

I'm desperate for human connection. The authentic kind. I feel alien in my own skin. Why can't I be okay? Why do I want so badly to do what I know what I know I shouldn't?

Post from mobile portal m.livejournal.com

More of the same. I've never felt more alone. Or depressed. I'm tired of feeling like this. Like I'm only good when it's convenient for everyone else, but not when I need friends the most.

I'm proud. I stood my ground on my belief. At the risk of making Nicole more mad, there were plenty of promises she never followed through on (cleaning? calling or texting when you'd be out late--like 8AM?), so don't hold me to a standard you won't hold yourself to. And unfortunately, it's MY bed, so it IS my business as to what happens with it ( Read more... )

I'm in a better mood. I have an HD DVR. It's nice to watch the stuff I usually miss... but for whatever reason G4 HD isn't coming in... I JUST WANT TO SEE OLIVIA MUNN IN HIGH DEF, IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK ( Read more... )

It's been a rough month and a half. I've come close to closing my Facebook account so I don't have to read updates from either her or my own "friends" who have taken to hanging out with her than myself. I see myself becoming a recluse... the only one who seems to care is Ryan, who texted me "U alive dude?". And yet I still haven't texted him back. ( Read more... )

Life goes on. And I'm starting to learn to flip the coin over when I've stared at the scarred side for too long. And with the help of my favorite Olivia Munn doppelganger, I know what I'm looking for, or rather, what to look for when I'm ready ( Read more... )

Fight or flight? It's hard to know what to do. Everything has changed since the break-up. I barely know who I am. I'm so tired of the emotional ups and downs. The start of the day is usually a battle within myself to just stay in bed and go back to sleep to not dwell on everything. Eventually at some point during the day I start to feel better but ( Read more... )

Working in retail is probably the worst thing to do when you come to the conclusion that you hate everything and everyone ( Read more... )