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Comments 34

ariake December 11 2011, 03:24:48 UTC
Please tell me you did not pay for this book. And if its a free ebook, please share your crack with me so I can follow along. XD

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xfortytwo December 11 2011, 03:26:30 UTC
Hahha torrents, bb!
But yeah, I do have a version but if it's for the kindle PC program thingy? I think Maya might have a better one if you don't have the kindle PC thing. I shall ask <.< >.>

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ppyajunebug December 11 2011, 03:38:23 UTC
Torrents ftw, for reals.

Yes, let me know if you need a format other than for Kindle. I can get it for you.

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cardiacattack December 11 2011, 16:57:02 UTC
I want in on this! I'm entranced. As I read your reviews I'm like "What? No. No, that's not possible. Surely not." I must see this with my own eyes!

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laurahonest December 11 2011, 03:34:27 UTC
how exactly did she get this published?

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xfortytwo December 11 2011, 03:35:30 UTC
She's Tyra Banks. And ... yeah XD

I think the better question is: how is this a New York Times bestseller.

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laurahonest December 11 2011, 03:39:36 UTC
I think that falls under "she's Tyra Banks" too actually. Similarly like how Snooki is an author......stupid people read shit by famous people because they are famous.

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laceymoibella December 11 2011, 16:36:46 UTC
My thoughts exactly.

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herbeautifullie December 11 2011, 03:53:21 UTC
Does the E-Book list the editor of this? Because, really, they freakin' suck.

"...his adoring, applauding, whistling, screaming fans"

I'm pretty sure most authors will tell you "two and go" because too many is just bogging down the reader. All I could think about when reading that line was, "OMG, two and go! Three if it's a really, really pivotal scene but otherwise TWO AND FREAKIN' GO."

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xfortytwo December 11 2011, 04:06:43 UTC
This book is FULL of Tyra drawing out descriptions with like 80,000 adjectives. She had this whole section on dresses in Chapter 6 that made me want to punch her face in. Let me show you:

"Dresses lay helter-skelter over the racks, on the counters, and on every inch of floor space: Feathered dresses; sequined
dresses; tiered, bustled, and ruffled dresses. Dresses with
sweetheart necklines, dresses with one shoulder; off-theshoulder, strapless, and open-backed dresses. Halters. Aline and asymmetrical dresses. Sundresses and cocktail
dresses. Prom dresses. Ombres. Metallics."

I found the editor in the acknowledgements. (And the acknowledgments as bad as the rest D:). Her name is Wendy Loggia. And the draft was apparently 1,000 pages, omfg. Also, Tyra at one point thanked HARVARD. the fuck.

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herbeautifullie December 11 2011, 04:12:41 UTC
JESUS.

1,000 pages? It's sad because now, I can't even bitch about the editor. She must have saved us from so, so much! D: Harvard, eh? Wow. They should be ashamed!

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xfortytwo December 11 2011, 04:15:08 UTC
She even named two Professors. I wouldn't wanna be them right now XDD

And yeah, seriously. This book is already like 600 pages apparently. But I'm guessing the editor didn't have a very good starting point to work with XDD

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pointblankdarcy December 11 2011, 05:02:32 UTC
Ing: SEDUSKHEEON USED HAIR-FLIP. IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE. THE CREEPY MAN IN THE FRONT NOW WANTS TO SIN WITH YOU. (He literally said he wanted to sin with her >.<)

I L U

"It feels like a little wormy man is crawling in your mouth, anyways."

D: I've never been kissed but omg what omg ugh never omg no i cannot

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la_loony December 11 2011, 13:06:32 UTC
"It feels like a little wormy man is crawling in your mouth, anyways."

D: I've never been kissed but omg what omg ugh never omg no i cannot

Maybe Tyra wants whoever reads this not to kiss because she thinks they get pregnanz from it...would fit in with her other biological missunderstandingsXD

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xfortytwo December 11 2011, 15:53:15 UTC
I can assure you that kissing is not supposed to feel that way. I mean, my first kiss wasn't omg amazing, but there was no wromy man crawling. UGH. Tyra must have some really bad kissing experiences XDDD

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laceymoibella December 11 2011, 16:39:20 UTC
She has obviously never been kissed.

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scatteredintime December 11 2011, 10:26:05 UTC
Hmm, I wonder if Fran Fine ever went to Modelland. She totally had the power of ThirtyNever.

Also, I hope you guys have realised that "Tookie" is not only maybe a play on "Sookie" but quite clearly Tyra noticed how witty she is, because if it weren't for the random T appearing, the girl could be called COOKIE DE LA CREME. Which somehow sounds better than Tookie any day. CREAMY AND COOKIE DE LA CREME.

Hmm, baby gherkins. Kinda craving them rn.

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la_loony December 11 2011, 13:07:27 UTC
Maybe Tookie will have a child called Cookie?

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laceymoibella December 11 2011, 16:33:48 UTC
Hahahahahaah!

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xfortytwo December 11 2011, 15:54:08 UTC
LOL FRAN FINE.

and yesss, we talked about the Cookie thing XD I was wondering if she meant for Tookie to resemble Cookie, but I don't think so. WHo knows anymore, though! ahha

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