runaway 001-007, onew/minho, pg
runaway 007
onew/minho
1,404
PG
previous: { 001 | 002 | 003 | 004 | 005 | 006 }
So. This is just something I randomly started to write. You could say I started writing it when I felt frustrated with many things and just wrote it for my personal amusement and with no real purpose. lol.
*
Jinki pursed his lips together as he studied the pastries in front of him, he could get a plain croissant or one with chocolate. Completely focussed on the trays in front of him, he stepped sideways to reach for tongs, and bumped into a stranger.
“Oh, excuse me!” Jinki immediately mumbled, tearing his gaze away from the buttery pastries to the man looming next to him. Jinki felt his heart stop dead as he saw who it was that he had bumped into, and Jinki wished he had never come out this morning.
“It’s okay, Lee-ssi.” Jinki cringed hearing the way Minho called him, he had never called him that before and the formality made his stomach turn to ice. Jinki knew he had made Minho wait too long, but he didn’t expect him to speak this formally to him.
“How are you,” Jinki swallowed as he studied Minho’s profile, regretting his words almost immediately. Minho looked good, with his short dark brown hair, a tan coat, and tight black skinny jeans encasing his slender legs. Minho looked as if he had walked straight off a catwalk and into the bakery.
“I’m good,” Minho nodded, and Jinki watched as he turned to look down at the blueberry danishes. “Hm, I wonder if these are good?” Jinki figured that Minho was probably talking to himself, but he found himself stepping closer and nodding.
“Yeah they’re good, but the apple ones are even better.” Jinki managed a small smile when Minho turned sharply to look at him.
“Thanks,” Jinki beamed, blinking his eyes rapidly as he watched Minho grab a couple of the danishes. Jinki opened his mouth to say something else but then he realised that Minho was gone. Jinki sucked in a deep breath, and he chose a croissant and one pain au chocolat, and then he headed out of the bakery. The warmth seemed to be gone and Jinki walked unaware of where he was going.
It was only when he found himself standing in front of a door, a locked and shut door that Jinki blinked and came to his senses. Kibum was at work, and Jinki himself was meant to be at work too, not staring at shut doors and traipsing around the city like a lost puppy.
*
“Was there something you wanted?”
“I was just uh,” Jinki paused glancing around his kitchen, “wondering how um Minho was doing?”
“Minho? Oh he’s great, hyung.” Taemin sounded so happy down the phone it made Jinki’s chest ache, and he wondered if he had missed his chance of that.
“Is he? That’s good.”
“Yeah, he’s dating a model I think? I think there is some talk of an engagement too.” Each word was a nail being hammered into Jinki’s chest, but instead of holding the framework together, it seemed to be causing his heart to fall apart around him. He hadn’t asked that, why on Earth did Taemin even think he wanted to hear that?
“That’s great, I’m so glad.” Jinki forced himself to smile even though there was no one to see it. “He deserves to be happy, to be with someone like that.” Jinki forced his lips to curve up even higher, still smiling as a tear slid down his cheek. He really was the biggest idiot in the world.
“How about you hyung? How are you?”
“Oh you know me,” Jinki wiped his tears away with his sleeve, “I’m just fantastic, really great.”
“He meant, are you seeing someone,” Jinki froze when he suddenly heard Jonghyun’s voice, and blinked realising that Taemin obviously had the phone on speaker phone again. Jinki wanted to groan, he hated speaker phone, the fact that Taemin was sharing his miserable life with Jonghyun just made him want to jump out the window. Like it wasn’t bad enough that Minho was fantastic and practically engaged and now he found out Jonghyun was listening in too.
“Oh,” Jinki inhaled slowly, “yeah, I am actually.” Jinki glanced around his kitchen, ignoring the gasps he heard through the phone. Yeah of course it was shocking, Jinki thought bitterly. Minho was the only person in recent years to have liked him.
“Really hyung? You didn’t tell me! What’s his name?”
“Eunsook,” Jinki replied when his eyes fell on the soft plush elephant that Taemin had given him at Christmas, too late he realised what he’d said.
“Eunsook? Wait hyung, you’re dating a girl?” Jonghyun screeched down the phone making Jinki wince.
“No,” Jinki smiled viciously at his refection in the glass, his puffy red eyes, and his stupid big lips, “I was joking. It’s none of your business what his name is.”
“Just like it’s none of your business who I see,” Jinki nodded and then hung up, giving no one the chance to reply.
Jinki stood up, still gripping the kitchen counter and then he walked through to the living room. Jinki flopped down onto the couch and pulled the elephant, Eunsook onto his lap. Why Taemin had given him a stuffed elephant, he didn’t know but it was comforting and Jinki treated it like a pet. It hurt to think he was just getting older and that he would always be alone. Jinki knew it was his fault because he could never let anyone in, but it still hurt.
*
Jinki sighed as he checked the time for what felt like the millionth time that night. It was 1:09am now, wow five minutes had passed. It was the longest night ever. No matter what Jinki did he could not stop thinking, he could feel his heart beating and his thoughts flickered faster and faster in his mind.
He could remember being in high school, just starting boarding school. Jinki trembled slightly, he hadn’t thought about this for years. Why was it coming back now? Wasn’t he meant to be over this now? Jinki bit his lip remembering his so-called best friends, and how they had all confided in one super private secret from their lives. Jinki had felt so happy to have friends, to have close friends he could trust and tell everything.
“Jinki, what’s your secret?” Matt asked, blinking his eyes slowly.
“I… I don’t have one?” Jinki shook his head, biting his lip. What could he say?
“But… you must?” Ravi replied, with a frown and a shake of his head, “Something you didn’t dare to tell anyone.”
And somehow Jinki found himself opening his mouth and it all came bubbling up. Jinki felt horrified by all the words flying out of his mouth. How the previous year he had kissed a boy, how he felt attracted to boys not girls at all. It all came flying out, all of Jinki’s precious hidden secrets. And Jinki felt free, and happy and so close to his best friends.
But after a week, his best friends found him and pulled Jinki to a quiet part of the playground.
“Jinki, I’m sorry but we can’t be friends with you anymore.”
“Wh-what?” Jinki asked in shock, his eyes watering in surprise.
“Your secrets have been spread around the school, we can’t be friends with someone… someone like you.” Matt sneered and rolled his eyes, “You’re a disgusting faggot. You know we tried to stay being friends with you.” Matt laughed and just shook his head.
“But honestly, how could we stay friends with you?”
Jinki felt his eyes watering, someone had reached into his chest and crushed his heart. There was nothing left, just a thousand broken shards. His so called friends laughed at him as they walked off. After that Jinki had no friends, he was a total outcast. Every time he tried to get close to someone, it felt as if they laughed at him and ridiculed him once they knew he was gay.
Jinki opened his eyes and panted, no no he couldn’t think about that! But as if that wasn’t bad enough he began to remember his ex boyfriend. The one who had made him close his heart even more. Jeremy, the half Korean and half American boyfriend who had hurt Jinki by cheating on him. Jinki shuddered and opened his eyes again, getting up and heading to the kitchen. He couldn’t bear to think about him, if he did he would be sick for the next day. No matter that it was the weekend, Jinki couldn’t think about him.
*
NEW SHHINEEE JAPAN ALBUMG HFGJSG \o/ CANT WAAAAAAAAAAAIT EXDIGHgRjkghs :DDDDDDDDDDD
onew/minho
1,404
PG
previous: { 001 | 002 | 003 | 004 | 005 | 006 }
So. This is just something I randomly started to write. You could say I started writing it when I felt frustrated with many things and just wrote it for my personal amusement and with no real purpose. lol.
*
Jinki pursed his lips together as he studied the pastries in front of him, he could get a plain croissant or one with chocolate. Completely focussed on the trays in front of him, he stepped sideways to reach for tongs, and bumped into a stranger.
“Oh, excuse me!” Jinki immediately mumbled, tearing his gaze away from the buttery pastries to the man looming next to him. Jinki felt his heart stop dead as he saw who it was that he had bumped into, and Jinki wished he had never come out this morning.
“It’s okay, Lee-ssi.” Jinki cringed hearing the way Minho called him, he had never called him that before and the formality made his stomach turn to ice. Jinki knew he had made Minho wait too long, but he didn’t expect him to speak this formally to him.
“How are you,” Jinki swallowed as he studied Minho’s profile, regretting his words almost immediately. Minho looked good, with his short dark brown hair, a tan coat, and tight black skinny jeans encasing his slender legs. Minho looked as if he had walked straight off a catwalk and into the bakery.
“I’m good,” Minho nodded, and Jinki watched as he turned to look down at the blueberry danishes. “Hm, I wonder if these are good?” Jinki figured that Minho was probably talking to himself, but he found himself stepping closer and nodding.
“Yeah they’re good, but the apple ones are even better.” Jinki managed a small smile when Minho turned sharply to look at him.
“Thanks,” Jinki beamed, blinking his eyes rapidly as he watched Minho grab a couple of the danishes. Jinki opened his mouth to say something else but then he realised that Minho was gone. Jinki sucked in a deep breath, and he chose a croissant and one pain au chocolat, and then he headed out of the bakery. The warmth seemed to be gone and Jinki walked unaware of where he was going.
It was only when he found himself standing in front of a door, a locked and shut door that Jinki blinked and came to his senses. Kibum was at work, and Jinki himself was meant to be at work too, not staring at shut doors and traipsing around the city like a lost puppy.
*
“Was there something you wanted?”
“I was just uh,” Jinki paused glancing around his kitchen, “wondering how um Minho was doing?”
“Minho? Oh he’s great, hyung.” Taemin sounded so happy down the phone it made Jinki’s chest ache, and he wondered if he had missed his chance of that.
“Is he? That’s good.”
“Yeah, he’s dating a model I think? I think there is some talk of an engagement too.” Each word was a nail being hammered into Jinki’s chest, but instead of holding the framework together, it seemed to be causing his heart to fall apart around him. He hadn’t asked that, why on Earth did Taemin even think he wanted to hear that?
“That’s great, I’m so glad.” Jinki forced himself to smile even though there was no one to see it. “He deserves to be happy, to be with someone like that.” Jinki forced his lips to curve up even higher, still smiling as a tear slid down his cheek. He really was the biggest idiot in the world.
“How about you hyung? How are you?”
“Oh you know me,” Jinki wiped his tears away with his sleeve, “I’m just fantastic, really great.”
“He meant, are you seeing someone,” Jinki froze when he suddenly heard Jonghyun’s voice, and blinked realising that Taemin obviously had the phone on speaker phone again. Jinki wanted to groan, he hated speaker phone, the fact that Taemin was sharing his miserable life with Jonghyun just made him want to jump out the window. Like it wasn’t bad enough that Minho was fantastic and practically engaged and now he found out Jonghyun was listening in too.
“Oh,” Jinki inhaled slowly, “yeah, I am actually.” Jinki glanced around his kitchen, ignoring the gasps he heard through the phone. Yeah of course it was shocking, Jinki thought bitterly. Minho was the only person in recent years to have liked him.
“Really hyung? You didn’t tell me! What’s his name?”
“Eunsook,” Jinki replied when his eyes fell on the soft plush elephant that Taemin had given him at Christmas, too late he realised what he’d said.
“Eunsook? Wait hyung, you’re dating a girl?” Jonghyun screeched down the phone making Jinki wince.
“No,” Jinki smiled viciously at his refection in the glass, his puffy red eyes, and his stupid big lips, “I was joking. It’s none of your business what his name is.”
“Just like it’s none of your business who I see,” Jinki nodded and then hung up, giving no one the chance to reply.
Jinki stood up, still gripping the kitchen counter and then he walked through to the living room. Jinki flopped down onto the couch and pulled the elephant, Eunsook onto his lap. Why Taemin had given him a stuffed elephant, he didn’t know but it was comforting and Jinki treated it like a pet. It hurt to think he was just getting older and that he would always be alone. Jinki knew it was his fault because he could never let anyone in, but it still hurt.
*
Jinki sighed as he checked the time for what felt like the millionth time that night. It was 1:09am now, wow five minutes had passed. It was the longest night ever. No matter what Jinki did he could not stop thinking, he could feel his heart beating and his thoughts flickered faster and faster in his mind.
He could remember being in high school, just starting boarding school. Jinki trembled slightly, he hadn’t thought about this for years. Why was it coming back now? Wasn’t he meant to be over this now? Jinki bit his lip remembering his so-called best friends, and how they had all confided in one super private secret from their lives. Jinki had felt so happy to have friends, to have close friends he could trust and tell everything.
“Jinki, what’s your secret?” Matt asked, blinking his eyes slowly.
“I… I don’t have one?” Jinki shook his head, biting his lip. What could he say?
“But… you must?” Ravi replied, with a frown and a shake of his head, “Something you didn’t dare to tell anyone.”
And somehow Jinki found himself opening his mouth and it all came bubbling up. Jinki felt horrified by all the words flying out of his mouth. How the previous year he had kissed a boy, how he felt attracted to boys not girls at all. It all came flying out, all of Jinki’s precious hidden secrets. And Jinki felt free, and happy and so close to his best friends.
But after a week, his best friends found him and pulled Jinki to a quiet part of the playground.
“Jinki, I’m sorry but we can’t be friends with you anymore.”
“Wh-what?” Jinki asked in shock, his eyes watering in surprise.
“Your secrets have been spread around the school, we can’t be friends with someone… someone like you.” Matt sneered and rolled his eyes, “You’re a disgusting faggot. You know we tried to stay being friends with you.” Matt laughed and just shook his head.
“But honestly, how could we stay friends with you?”
Jinki felt his eyes watering, someone had reached into his chest and crushed his heart. There was nothing left, just a thousand broken shards. His so called friends laughed at him as they walked off. After that Jinki had no friends, he was a total outcast. Every time he tried to get close to someone, it felt as if they laughed at him and ridiculed him once they knew he was gay.
Jinki opened his eyes and panted, no no he couldn’t think about that! But as if that wasn’t bad enough he began to remember his ex boyfriend. The one who had made him close his heart even more. Jeremy, the half Korean and half American boyfriend who had hurt Jinki by cheating on him. Jinki shuddered and opened his eyes again, getting up and heading to the kitchen. He couldn’t bear to think about him, if he did he would be sick for the next day. No matter that it was the weekend, Jinki couldn’t think about him.
*
NEW SHHINEEE JAPAN ALBUMG HFGJSG \o/ CANT WAAAAAAAAAAAIT EXDIGHgRjkghs :DDDDDDDDDDD